How to deal with an overly emotional mom?

Question

So my mom has for a long time now (I am 17, so not for that long) been so god d**n emotional. And she doesn't really see it. She knows she is emotional to the extent that she has feelings, but not to the extent where she gets really worked up. And by worked up I mean she gets all teary, talks really loud, makes small little things into huge bonanzas, she is way too persistent, says I blame her for everything (whenever I bring up how I feel). It makes me sad, because I don't know if she is sick mentally, or that I have some misconstrued ability at judging peoples reactions.

What is wrong with her?... Me?

Answer 1

First, I think you should discuss with your own physician/pediatrician. Perhaps a counselor at school to see what issues you have to tackle??? You could also open up a dialogue with her own physician as well. Seek help from those around you who has professional backgrounds where they could really help.  

Answer 2

My mom is like that a lot too. I usually just listen to what she has to say. I would try telling her how it makes you feel when she gets like that, so maybe she can try to adjust the way she acts so it's easier for you to help her. If that doesn't help though, maybe you can get another adult in your life like your dad or grandparents to talk to her about, that way maybe they can her the help she needs, if she needs any.

Answer 3

Nothing is really wrong with you or her. Humans differ greatly in their response to things. I am a pretty emotional person. I cry at movies and get teary very easily. My husband on the other hand, will not cry unless there is a death and even then, it has to be someone really close to him. It's just a difference that we have. I don't think either is wrong.

  My mother is also a worry wart. She cries very easily and sometimes over things that have happened a very long time ago that can not be changed. She worries about every little thing and turns a hangnail into a decapitation. I have learned there are certain things I don't tell her until they are over because it serves no purpose. It only stresses her out and she just doesn't need to know until things are finalized. I also have learned to be quite the psychologist in my own way because I have dealt with our families past problems. I can see how my mothers upbringing causes her to be the way she is.  She cries a lot when she talks about my being abused when I was young and how she didn't stop it. I have told her that I wouldn't have changed it for anything because every little thing that has happened in my life has made me who I am today and I like me. She still hangs onto the pain even though I try to get her to see that it worked out for the best.

  I am sure it wouldn't hurt for her to have some therapy to help her cope with some of her emotional issues but if you can't get her to see it, all you can do is see a therapist of your own to cope with the scars of your own childhood. I know you have scars because everyone has them. When you learn about human difference and what you can do for yourself, you might be able to help her with some words of wisdom in the future. One other thing to think about is that your mom is most likely in menopause at this stage in her life. this is going to make her more emotional and there really isn't much that can be done for it. For now, don't let her make you feel bad, just understand that this is just the way she is and do your best to work on your own issues.

EDIT: As for the shorts issue, what would it hurt to let her buy you a new pair of swim shorts? She wants to and it wouldn't cost you a thing. Let her do for you. She knows her time is short in being able to do things like this for you. It is very possible that she is feeling anxious because her role is changing with you. You are becoming a man and her "job" as mommy is coming to an end. It is difficult for mothers to let their sons go. Her anxiety about these things might be showing up as anger. Try to keep it in your head that she is having a hard time knowing that her baby is all grown up. She will eventually catch on and be ok with it. Until you are a parent, you can't explain how much your children mean to you...so much of a moms life is rapped up in their childs life. That has been her source of achievement. Being a good mom is a tough job and we sacrifice a lot for our children. (many times more than they know) Sometimes we might perceive something as not being thankful for all that we do, when in reality you might not even realize what she has given up to give you the things you have.

Answer 4

Omg dude im so in your shoes, im 16 and a half except my mom is a emotional acholic which is worse. But yea I would be brave and tell her to go to therapy it helped my mom. She doesn't have the money for it anymore though, omg she is driving me crazy.

Answer 5

Sounds like she doesn't quite know how to let you grow up.  You have to remember she has been your Mom for 17 years, guiding you, helping you, supporting you, and now you are growing up and don't quite need her as much as you used to, and probably feel you don't need her at all..which is not the case believe me.  I think your Mom needs some kind of direction in her life, such as maybe getting a job if she doesn't have one, or maybe volunteering somewhere, get more involved in her friendships, or create new ones.  Good luck to both of you.

Answer 6

ha- welcome to the process of separating from your parent(s)!

i don't mean to make light of it- but it sounds like she wants to hold on to you and know what's happening like when you were little, whereas you seek more independence..

if you want to work it out, go to a counselor together- i'd think she'd be all for it. they can help you get the communication thing working better

good luck

Answer 7

Comfort her she needs it

Answer 8

start making the coffee! put 40mg, nah makeit at least 60mg of valium in with the coffee grinds, she won't taste or see a thing. used to do that with my ex when we were together, we both felt better. ativan or clonazapam can be substituted instead, obviously adjust the mgs accordingly. 6-8 mg should do it.