How to deal with being impatient w/ my daughter?

Question

my patience is so short...when i help her with her homework i expect her to catch on fast and when she dosen't my patience run short......i want ti be a better mother...how do i develope patience???

Answer 1

When your patience starts to run short, just walk away. Tell her you two need a little bit of a break and you'll come back to it. It'll give you time to calm down and will give her a chance to get her anxiety under control. While you're taking a break, see if you can come from it another way that she might understand better. It's not that she doesn't get it, it's that you haven't explained it to her in a way she can understand. May take a few tries though, so try to understand that her brain is wired different.

Maybe even go so far as to take it and break it down into very simple babysteps.

Answer 2

With my 3 older children, I was like that, Now I'm older and have another child I looked back, And realize that I was so wrong, stop your self and remember children remember too, RELAX and make your self realize you are creating a memory for her and your self, make life as sweet as you can with her, She will remember it and you will too.

Answer 3

You only get one shot at being a good mom. Making memories for both of you to look back on is what is happening now. Do you want your daughter to see your impatience and even deeper than that, her feeling like she is lacking in your eyes? Find humor when you can, and don't be in any hurry for life to pass on by. My kids are grown and we had wonderful memories. I'm not saying I was perfect, but life is waaaay too short to get upset over the small stuff.

Answer 4

sometime their little mind just doesn't grasp what you are trying to get them to do. grandson used to be same way. walk away and let them figure out problem, then check it to see if they are right. it'll also lower blood press.

Answer 5

Pay attention to what is happening in your head when you are working with your daughter and you start to lose your patience.  

I'm guessing that somewhere in the background someone (your mom, your sister, aunt lucy) is saying something like "See what a bad parent you are, can't even teach your daughter math"  Tell that voice to shut the h@!! up and focus on your kid.

Answer 6

Games.  I had the same problem with my kindergardener (whom is very advance).  I realized I was taking her work too seriously and needed to lighten up.  I turn on soothing music when we go to sit down at the table and do my best to make it fun for both of us.  On the days I'm not up to the challenge and know it'll be bad for both of us I get my husband or brother or mother to pitch in.  I don't want my lousy attitude to ruin her learning experience.

Answer 7

Oh, I'm right there with you....I lack patience too, in just about every arena in my life, I struggle to hold on to 'it'. LOL

What I have found that helps is to have an inner dialog running that basically is constantly reminding myself HOW I want a certain scenario to play out.  IN this case, I would be telling myself "I am such a good Mom, sitting down with my sweetie to do homework.  This means so much to her education & self confidence, I know I will be calm and encouraging."

Also, run the scene through your mind ahead of time.  Put a vision in your head of how it will turn out.  Put a vision in your head of how you will react when she is slow.  What will you say?  Will you put a hand on her shoulder and give her a smile?

GOOD LUCK!!!!!  I know you can do it, because I finally figured it out too!

Answer 8

This sounds like an average night in my house. I have a 9 year old daughter and I too get so impatient. To the point that I get angry with her. I personally think that it is the age we are going through right now...it isn't that she isn't getting the work she needs to do but that she just isn't focused at the task in front of her. I remind myself of this daily. Your not a bad mom...I don't believe for a second that any mom and/or dad has not lost a little composure with children. Parenting isn't easy.

Answer 9

Oh...For a minute I thought I might have asked this question =)  I go through the same thing all the time.  Things that seem so easy seem so hard to her.  I will try to tell her different ways to remember things and she still doesn't get it.  I have to walk away and tell her to work on it herself for awhile.  After I take a break from the situation then it is a little easier to go back and start again.  I do know what you are going through.  It is very frustrating and I feel like I need more patience to become a better mother too!  I think in such a fast paced world, we are expected to do everything fast and the slow thinking of a child slows us down.  Maybe that is good in a way.

Answer 10

Kids get frustrated too. Just take a deep breath, if you stay calm she'll stay calm. Once you start freaking out, she'll get nervous and it'll be harder for her to grasp the homework, which in turn will cause you to get more frustrated. If there is someone else to help her, maybe they could step in for a few nights to give you a small break. You are her mother, and everything you do or say is like a blueprint for her future. She sees how you react to certain situations and she will then see that "oh, so that's how I'm supposed to act, also". Teach her by example, you CAN do it. Everyone loses their patience, but the way you handle it can also be a teaching tool. Good Luck!

Answer 11

just keep telling yourself just to breathe and relax.  life's too short to get worked up over small things and know that your are raising your daughter the best you can and that she is a very bright girl and will catch on.  have faith in yourself and just try to relax and enjoy the moments spent with your daughter rather than worry about if she'll catch on to something  you're showing her.  good luck.