How to discipline a 3-year-old daughter?

Question

My daughter always fights back whenever I tell her to do something. She has a lot of reasons and excuses. Imagine at her age, she reasons out just like grown ups...What kind of discipline should I enforce?

She even hurts other children, her teacher as well as other adults....

Can anyone help me?

Answer 1

Put her in time out.  She will not want to stay at first but keep putting her on until she stays.  When she does do something wrong like hitting put her on time out and tell her why it is wrong and that she wouldn't want someone to do that to her.  Also you need to be consistent when you say you are going to do something do it.  Don't let her get away with it one time and punish her the next.  She needs to know that when you say something you mean it.  Don't spank her because that will only make the situation worse. If  you tell her hitting is bad yet you are doing it to her when she does something you don't like she is going to do the same thing to others.

Answer 2

Be firm. Don't argue with her. Every second you spend arguing is time she is in control of you.

If she doesn't comply then she needs to go in time out. She probably won't stay there at first so you need to just keep telling her "You are in time out" and putting her back. Don't say anything else to her and don't let her see you angry. Just be firm. She can't see that her behavior is upsetting you or she will know she can keep it up and you will give up. She would be in control.

Set a timer and let her know that when it goes off she can get up but until then, she stays in time out. If she is still getting up when the timer goes off, start it over again. The rule of thumb is one minute in time out for each year of age so she should be there for 3 minutes. I would start with it set at 3 minutes and if she sets for even 30 seconds before the timer goes off, let her up. The important thing at first is to make sure she understands that time out means sitting in the time out spot.

As she learns, she should be sitting for longer periods of time until she actually is sitting for the whole 3 minutes. If she screams and cries, ignore her. Its a ploy to manipulate you into letting her get up.

If you notice that she does sit for 1 minute or 2 minutes, then gets antsy you can ask her if she will mind you now and let her up if she says yes. If she gets up and acts up again immediately, put her back in time out to finish the time she got out of.

Its hard. She is going to try to convince you that her heart is breaking but its all manipulation. She is very intelligent so she knows exactly how to push your buttons but remember, you are the adult.

When you tell her to do something, make it very clear to her what she is to do. You can't tell her to pick up her toys. You should tell her to put her dolls where they belong, then put something else where it goes, etc. When she has complied, tell her what a great helper she is, how proud you are, etc. Positive reinforcement it sometimes more important than discipline, especially if you are constantly on her case for all the bad things she does. She needs to know that you see and appreciate the good things about her. Praise and discipline together get the best results.

Answer 3

I think you need serious help when you're asking on yahoo answers.

Answer 4

Put her in time-out for three minutes when she acts up or doesn't do what she's asked. She will try to fight it at first- my son did. He'd wait until I would look up then get up, but I put him right back where he was. Then he'd try to get up and get a toy to play with while sitting down, but I'd go and get it and tell him he could have it back after time-out was over. It didn't take long for him to catch on. The most important thing is that you be consistant. If you put her in time-out for arguing- make sure that you do it every time she argues so that she knows that it's unacceptable. Another thing I would recommend- don't reason with her. If you ask her to pick up her toys and she starts to give you fourteen reasons why she can't or wants to do it later- tell her no, you asked her to pick up her toys so she needs to do it. If she continues, just tell her we'll talk later but right now you need to pick up your toys like I asked you. She may get upset, but she'll know when you ask her to do something, she needs to do it. It won't take long, she'll catch on and stop doing the things that she's doing! Three year olds are alot smarter than we give them credit for! :-)

Answer 5

Get out that belt now, or better yet get a branch off a tree and just beat her bottom with that. This is what's wrong with parents these days, they don't spank their kids! Did you ever hear of parents dealing with this **** 50 years ago, no they beat the c**p out of them if they even tried.

Answer 6

CALL NANNY 911 jk well first off don't hit her because that isn't necessary at her age .when she trys to reason with you don't give in or you will be screwed.try to not raise your voice and be as calm as possible and tell her no when she throws her tantrums and if she whines don't give her too much attention because if you respond you much often by yelling it only makes things even worse..you should reward her every time she has a good day at school though and even ask the teacher to send her home with a note saying how good she was . but i really think you should go see a child therapist they will truly have the answers you can even ask the doctor about her behavior and ask what to do