How to get 5.5 yr old to stop hitting his older sister?

Question

My 5.5 yrs old son will start Kindergarten soon. He has been to preschool, soccer and other camps/activities & playdates. Absolutely no complaints from anywhere. But, he hits his 9 yrs old sister. For silly reasons: "she was looking at me", "she was singing too loud".

We have tried everything - timeout, taking away privileges, toys, grounding, talking to him when we are all calm...

Nothing works. He continues to hit. There is no consequence that will really bother him. He is fine with spending time in his room (no playing), is fine with no TV, or missing a fun outing or dessert. He only hits his sister, no one else.

Any ideas? My husband says it is a phase. Maybe he is right, but I cannot just sit and wait for the phase to end.

I am a SAHM. The kids have no issues other than this. In fact, more than once strangers have commented on how well-behaved they are. Their friends beg for playdates with them.

Any ideas how to stop the hitting?

Answer 1

Spank Him!

Answer 2

I know this sounds crazy, but hold him down and have her hit him back, hard. Or maybe she could pull his hair really hard if you are worried that she is too strong to hit him. The point here is that she is defending herself, he is forced to be the victim and learn what she is feeling. Also, be VERY unemotional about it. He may be doing this just to see how YOU react. You must explain it to the daughter in advance and also to him (maybe together or separately, you know them best). Good luck.

Answer 3

I think you need to try a spanking. A lot of time this is the only way to get through to young child like this one. It may be a phase, but you need to end the phase as quickly as possible. If you spank, don't do it in fornt of anyone. (Like his sister) Do it in private and let him know there will always be punishment for this kind of behaivor

Answer 4

Um maybe give him a spanking? Then he would know that hitting hurts and stop doing it.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 5

ummmm, u might want to try counseling. this may be just a phase between ur son and daughter...

Answer 6

i would suggest get a nanny or something dont sapnak him that only shows ur hitting him so its ok to hit someone else maybe give him time outs and take away privalages when he samcks her

Answer 7

people are so ignorant. You don't teach a kid not to hit by hitting them. How absurd. It's common sense.

You have tried many things but how long did you try each thing? You have to be consistent and switching from one punishment to another is not being consistent. You need to make it a set rule...put it on the fridge even and then have a set consquence for breaking the rule. You have to follow through with the same consequence each time no matter what, even if it doesn't  "seem" to be working.

On top of this start a reward program for good behavior. Teach him what to do when he is angry. Give him some options like counting to ten, yelling into a pillow, whatever you think will help and then get a glass jar and draw a line about halfway up around the jar. Tell your son that everytime he makes the right choice he will get a marble in his jar. for example if he gets mad at his sister and instead of hitting her he yells into his pillow then he will get a marble. If he hits he will get the consequence and NO marble.

One he reaches the goal line (which you should set low so he gets it rather quickly and sees the benefit of it), then he gets a reward such as an ice-cream cone or whatever you think he will like.

Often reward programs work best for kids like this who resent punishment.

Answer 8

It may help if you tell the girl to hit him back. Not like just constantly hit him for fun, but just like when he hits her.

Answer 9

Try telling him if he hits he is to go to his room

***this is what i would do if you have stairs if hits her or he does anything wrong tell him to go sit on the ''Naughty Stair''put him there for as long as desired and when he is ready to come out have him appologize to her.