How to get out of a confirmation?

Question

I'm a huge member of my church. I do practically everything e.g., I acolyte, I read the bible readings every Sunday, and I attend the youth group every week.

This year they're confirming kids (its like being baptized again in your teens). I know that I will be expected to do it, but I don't want to. I'm fine with doing readings and stuff, because I believe in the theory behind Christianity, but I don't believe in God.

I don't want to be confirmed because I don't want to commit to something I think is fake.

How do I tell my parents, fellow church-goers, and friends that I don't want to get baptized? I don't want to be kicked out of youth group or looked at differently.

Answer 1

If you don't believe in God dont go to church tell your parents and go to h**l.

Answer 2

your pastor should reinforce the idea that your conformation occurs at your will, when you are ready to accept God, they should be the last people to judge you. a church full of judgement is not a church you should be at.  

Answer 3

i was confirmed at 13, and i dont believe in anything.

at the time i thought i was more confused and did it xause i thought if i didnt i may of regretted it, and i did it alot for my family.  its a choice, i mean, you may change your mind as its a personal choice that may change over the years

Answer 4

You've already been baptized -- so a confirmation is simply an adult agreement with something that was done TO you as a baby when you weren't able to give informed consent! :-)  

However, no one can force you to go through confirmation.  That is an extremely personal decision.  You're the one that has to stand up there in church and agree to a series of questions regarding your belief system, and it shouldn't be done simply to satisfy someone else's expectations.  It's perfectly fair to simply say, "No, I'm not ready."  You don't have to go into a big discussion of your beliefs, etc.  Just being honest and saying, "No, this is something I repsect too much, and I don't want to just do it because it's a social expectation -- I will do it when and if I feel the time is right."  NO ONE can argue with that.  It may not be until you're 25 -- it may be never.

They won't kick you out of youth group -- if anything, they'll figure you need it more than ever, now! :-D  

Answer 5

well, talk to your parents first then tell them to talk to the head person of everything. maybe you can keep it a secret so you wont be looked at differently

Answer 6

This is hypocritical.  By participating in the church rituals, you are expressing your belief in God.  Structured religions like yours do not give you the option to hand-pick the elements of the religion that you wish to follow, and deny other elements.

If you really want to stick with the church for all of its social aspects, then just go through the confirmation ritual. Due to your lack of belief in God, it won't mean anything to you anyway so there is no harm done.

Answer 7

I would sit down and have a serious heart to heart with your pastor and parents. I understand completely where you are coming from, because I was the same way, only I went through with the confirmation because I thought there was something wrong with me. You can still continue in the youth group and being active in the church without being confirmed. My only food for thought is that maybe you have been "desensitized" to the wonder of God and His love. It is entirely possible due to the fact that you were raised in the church (I am assuming). Have a talk with your parents and your pastor, get yourself straight on what you believe, they will understand and will help you make a decision that is right for you!  

Answer 8

This is a toughy. I don't completely understand why you are an active member of the church if you don't believe in God. Basically you are worshiping someone you don't believe in. I don't know how you are going to explain that to the pastor, parents, etc.