How to get over abortion remorse?

Question

I had an abortion around this time last year--and I can't seem to shake off the depression that entails. I know I made the right decision, but I can't help but beat myself up over it. Have any of you had similar situations? How were you able to move on with your life?

Answer 1

if you never had that aborttion this question would never be asked..

that child is gunna haunt you for the rest of ur life..

that was a bad decision

Answer 2

Please don't beat yourself up.

I had one on June 4th of this year, and i cried and cried ... But then I remembered why i had it.

Don't get me wrong, I KNEW i didn't want the baby. My boyfriend was supportive of MY choice-but I knew he didn't want it either.

As it turned out, when i got the sonogram they give you right before the abortion, it had stopped growing and was probably deformed, so can you IMAGINE the life... throwing a baby out into the world with 2 young parents, probably handicapped... i believe if it witnessed my actions it knew it was the best one, and wouldn't of blamed me.

Remember girl, if you HAD the abortion, remember your reasons. Reinforce them into yourself and know that if you want to have a baby one day, you still can! and the time will be RIGHT.

I would love to talk to you ( i suck on these question things) my AIM is 'pajama x time' (dont ask..) ... i can possibly help you to feel better about  your situation, there's NO reason for you to agonize !

i have moved on 320% !

Answer 3

Ask yourself WHY you are sad! Is it from your religious beliefs? Is is from the loss of possibility?

I would say that you need to analyze the root-cause. If you made the right decision, you should not feel bad. If it is a loss of possibility, these things exist everywhere and everyday.

If it is from your religion - you need to examine your religion. Examine how it influences you.

My take = There is no higher purpose to anything, no reason - just events. We loose eggs every month. Get over it by realizing that if it were not for our past, our future would not be the way it is now. Try a therapist or counselor as a last resort. Speak to others. This is a good place for a bit of therapy - but there are nutbags on here too. Good luck!

Answer 4

first of all you didnt make the "right" decision.

no child deserves to die.

you should of put it up for adoption and gave it to a family that  would actually love it.

but thats beside the point. the past is unchangeable.

my best advice to you is to get some professional help.

dont go through this alone. You need to see and counsaler and see what they think you should do. dont beat your self up for it. you were thinking about yourself and sometimes you have to think about yourself first,

maybe you should try church.

prayyy!

Answer 5

I have never been placed in a position to get an abortion or feel that I should.

I have tried to put myself in your place before and I found that I would never be able to go through with it. I feel that I would have to kill a part of myself just to kill my child and I know many people who have done that.

I know there are women (and men) who have said they look at school yards and say "That could've been my child there playing" and many always feel that void.

I do know a place that could help you though and you will see just how many people are hurting after their abortions. They will not judge you and they are very compassionate and helpful. I'm sure with their help you will be able to find some solace in your decision.

http://www.hopeafterabortion.com/

Answer 6

Don't worry about all the discouraging answers. that is just there opinion. you did the right thing by getting an abortion. If you want to get over the blues just think about how much happier you and your bf will be and all the places you can now go and the good you did for the environment by not putting another consumer on the planet

Answer 7

It's hard to get over. The people I know that have had one regret it everyday! My friend remembers her due date and says " my baby would of been _ yrs old today" and gets sad! Just learn from your mistakes and don't make the same mistake twice!

Answer 8

I will not be judgemental, and I want to make you feel better. Think of it like this. When you go to heaven, your aborted child will be waiting there for you to give you a hug, forgive you, and love you.

Answer 9

i don't believe in abortion, but you already feel bad enough, so i'm not going to go off on you.

but, i think you most definitely need to seek counseling. it will help you get through everything.

Answer 10

I'm not going to give you the judeo-christian ehtic thing about  'murdering a child'.  Yuo already feel baad enough.  The only way you are going to get over this without anyone else putting your heart lower than it feels already is to find a good counselor that specializes in this type of depression.  I have never been pregnant, so i can t say i know hwo you feel.  I can understand depression, having to live with it all my life, and i can tell you a good counselor or therapist (TP) is the bes thing you ca ndo for ourself now.  Before you dismiss the idea, sit back and think about it.  It's not a sign of weakness to need help, it 's a sign of maturity and strength to ask.  You ca ndo this; asking us here wasthe first step.

Answer 11

Sorry to tell you but all the people I know that've had abortions still regret it and it'll probably hurt for the rest of their lives.  You ended a life that didn't ask to be created.  Now you'll never know what could have been.  It's only natural to feel that way.  Talk to a counselor if you can or try to find some support groups online.  Maybe find other girls that've had abortions to chat with.  All pain gets better with time.  Good luck.

Answer 12

I am sorry for your loss.  We all do thing that we think are best at the time and later realize maybe we could have made better choices.  Feel free to contact me if you want someone to listen in a non-judgmental way.