How to get over hearing about my ex flirting with and dating other girls? ?

Question

My ex and I were together for 10 years. We have a young son together. About 8 months ago he decided to end our relationship after we'd been agruing quite a bit. Later I discovered he'd probably been cheating on me, at least emotionally with a very young woman.

He has since moved on with his life, coming around to help with our son ONLY when I ask. In 8 months he's never called just to see him and has gone from being a very involved father to maybe a 1 day a week Dad. He seems to be enjoying his freedom and lack of responsibilities now. I'm still resentful and angry and am having a hard time getting over it as I'm now raising our 2 year old while he plays single bachelor now.

I hear about him flirting with people and going out with people and it makes me sick to my stomach. the idea of even dating anyone makes me sick at this point and I'm so stretched between school, work and our son I really have no time.

I am having a very hard time letting go of this man even though he really hurt me. I am still greiving the death of my son's family and he's off having fun with no apologies.

How can I truly get over this? Prayer isn't really helping. It's been 8 months and I'm still wondering why this all happened.

Answer 1

My God, I know what you are going through, I really do.  The best way to get over the troll is really try and not know what he is doing or dating or anything about him.  I had to tell my ex-husband that I didn't want anything to do with him ever again.  We do have a child together so I will have to deal with him sometimes, but we live very far apart and it helps.  Time does heal all wounds, but a lot of work and keeping yourself busy helps.  Just tell people that you do not want to know anything about him.  I promise, things will get better.  Take care.

Answer 2

Go directly to the source that continues to tell you about the ex's flirting and point blank tell them that it isn't necessary for them to tell you this because that chapter is closed and you would feel better if they would respect you enough to KEEP IT CLOSED.

Answer 3

It's worst now.  Unfortunately, grief has a way of coming back again and again over time.  But each time it comes back, it's not quite so bad.

Answer 4

This may sound funny, but a good way to forget about a man is to get another one.

Seriously! You spent 10 years doting over this one single person, and it'll be hard to turn your attention away from him now, even though he's not around. You can fill your day with school and work and your son, but none of those relationships give you the same sort of satisfaction as romantic love.

I'm not saying to fall into bed with the next nice guy that comes along, but being able to focus on another man will help the old one fade into the background.