How to stop being shy?

Question

ok iam getting tired of being shy at school all the time.

at home i talk to much but at school iam very shy and i dont know what to say iam trying my best not to be shy but i cant its hard.

i have been living hear for 6 years and i always been shy i did made friends but not that many but what i dont get is why am i shy now. i never been shy when i was a kid so idk

i sometimes feel like theres something wrong with me

so can any one help me

i feel so lonley =(

Answer 1

use the spine in your back and walk tall.  Body language and speech kid.  Not to mention self respect.

Answer 2

You got a million friends on here already. Perhaps you shouldn't be so hard on yourself?

Answer 3

If you join a sport or an activity i have found that this is the best way to meet people and make friends. Most school organizations try and help people to bond. Sometimes you need that little extra kick in the butt to get you moving and socializing.

I don't like camping, but I signed up to help with The Freshmen Camp at my school, and I bonded with a bunch of seniors and now i have senior friends! (I am a junior) I've always been shy to older people but school organizations kind of force you to make friends, which isn't always a bad thing! Some people need that type of encouragement.

Also another thing that could really boost your confidence and allow you to want to talk more is the way you dress. That silly quote "dress to impress" really works! People usually find that I look very young for my age, but recently i bought some really nice new clothes that were more "mature" for my age and i wore them when i went out to go and get a haircut. Later on my hairdresser asked me how old i was and when i told her i was 16 she said that when she first saw me she would've guessed 21! Now THAT boosted my confidence!

So to sum it all up. Find clothes that gives you confidence and join some type of sport/club/organization anything! It doesn't even have to be an organization from school. Join a local swim class or anything!

Just remember that you shouldn't let awesome opportunities slip by just because you're shy. Boost your confidence in any way you can!

Hope you get where you want!

Oh and be yourself, guys like cute shy girls ;)

I know it sounds so cliche to "be yourself" but I went through an experience where I wasn't acting like myself just to make friends. That point in my life was probably a time that i was most unhappy. So don't go through what I did! Just be happy....be yourself. It's ok to be shy.

Answer 4

you have to boost up your confidence, try starting small: just talking to some one you know, then get bigger.

Answer 5

you gotta beat, beat, beat.  

Answer 6

I have the same problem, but for me I think its more of a confidence issue...Just be yourself, people are people, they are all the same.  

Answer 7

i feel ya sweetheart. all of middle school i was like that. i had the "shy voice" i hated it. i would talk to people and absolutely cringe at myself. i know how hard it is. it's not going to be easy. but everyday pick out a new person and give them a compliment and smile. they will think you're nice [because you are!!] and they'll talk to you again. the more you do this the easier it will become. ask to borrow a pencil from time to time. raise your hand when you know the answer in school. join groups. i joined cheerleading, and i made friends with a lot of girls on the squad. it helps socially SO MUCH. the more you put yourself out there, the more people will get used to hearing you, and the more comfortable you'll become. oh, and something dorky i'd do every morning before school was listen to upbeat music and get myself pumped for school! haha try it, it helps!

hang in there! it WILL get better!

Answer 8

During puberty alot of people become more self concious. As time goes on people start to become more confident again. Getting a girlfriend would be a big boost to your confidence.

Answer 9

Run down the halls in your underwear. Seriously, then, they've seen it all. Nothing left to be shy about.

Answer 10

Try not to think so much about what others think of you. This is probably what is making you shy. So what if you say something silly, we all do at some point? But we all learn.. just try and speak up more in class/ around your friends.

Answer 11

join groups you can feel ok with

Answer 12

i am the opposite, so take my adivce, be random, wild, and crazy and pray to get caught, have fun and regret nothing, you'll have a better time.

Answer 13

Encourage yourself with something best in you about friendship and that's it.

Answer 14

you remind me of my (old) friend..  anyhow, just be like ME! don't care abotu what the h**l is gonna happen just do it!! really, itll work :P

orgthingy

Answer 15

lol im shy only when i meet new people but the more you talk i guess the better you will to talk to people and if your trying to make a freind then y ou got to get that fear over and go for it

hope this helped  

Answer 16

It could be that you are afraid of someone knowing something. It could be that you have to start small (keeping this in mind) just saying "Hi!" to someone to thinking about a general opening question to having a conversation.

Answer 17

That is so weird. That is like me too!! I am so shy at school but i talk like nonstop when it comes to a person i know very well.

What I do (coming from me) is that I just talk. Who cares what people think. What is worst thing that could happen? Be talkitve but nice at the same time though, because if you are loud and mean people will think your a jerk. I know that not being shy is hard thing to do because sometimes i struggle but you know what, what will they do? Nothing!!

Just be confident when you are talking to someone and sound friendly, so people may think that friendly.

Answer 18

I used to be in the same boat. I was shy throughout my entire child and teenage life. When I got in my twenties, I started to ask myself, "what would happen if I acted like myself ?", "Why do I care what anyone else thinks?" and "I love who I am so that's all that matters?" Now, no one can believe that I used to be shy.

Answer 19

being shy is your own decision.

tomorrow u should wake u pand make your mind decide today i would not be shy. but that doesnt mean going to school naked or anything.

just MAKE-UP your mind and set on it.

shyness is just a something of what u choose to be really.

start from tomorrow OK?

Answer 20

Go and talk to as many people as you can. I'm shy and I don't get noticed as much as my friend who is loud and brash. Sometimes being shy is better than being in your face. Theres nothing wrong with you so don't worry. Feel confident in yourself. Hold your head high. After a while of talking to people you will feel yourself start to ease and be natural. You will get over being shy :)

Answer 21

This is a regular phase everyone goes through while growing up.  The "shyness" factor, as I'd like to call it.

Here's a website that includes some tips that can help you with your shyness: http://lifeallows.org

From personal experience, I was shy when I was introduced into a new situation or I think that everyone's looking at me, but that's irrational.  I've learned that to get over it, you must get out of your comfort zone and just talk :)

Answer 22

hi,

being shy is something that i like in a person,but not toooo much..

anyway if you dont want to be shy no more just do these easy tips..

1.convinse your self that from now on you will not feel shy toward any one espcially in school.

2.try to talk with your best friend about this issue and i am sure that she will help you threw it.

3.When you go to school just walk to someone you dont know and ask him or her about anything for example:What time is it?

and while you ask this question just try to feel as much confident in your self.and dont forget to smile"only if you are a girl"!!!!  

Answer 23

You have to just be yourself.  Express yourself when you're around friends.  I used to have the same problem, being shy but now I'm not like that at all!  All you have to do is open up to some people.  You have to make some friends, its even best to be a friend to everyone, especially knowing what you've gone through.  Just be yourself and people will like you for who you are.

Answer 24

Sweetheart,  This all has to to with self esteem and how you feel about yourself.  Shyness is not having enough self esteem.  You don't want to call attention to yourself and are afraid you will say the wrong thing.  Believe this or not but shyness is a selfish thing, you are thinking about yourself not about what you have to offer to others.  You are obviously a nice person and deserve to feel better about yourself.

Think about the good things that you possess, trustworthiness, friendship, kindness, compassion the list can go on and on and you don't see it.  Make a practice of looking at yourself in the mirror and really tell yourself you like you.  I am serious talk to yourself and remind yourself that others need you if it is just a smile or a compliment you will be helping another person.  This in turn feels good to you and builds good feelings and makes friends.  Good Luck

Answer 25

theres no advice thats going to turn you in to an outgoing person, but just look at like .. what have you got to loose? go out there, be friendly and get people to know the real you. once you make some friends have some one on one time & your bound to let the real you loose! it takes time to be confident in yourself, but do things for you and boost your self esteem & your on your way! good luck<3

EDIT - waitress idea - really good!

Answer 26

start smoking!! i dont but i heard its a great way to meet and talk with people.  or try setting up a goal for yourself, like go to a new bar or club every 2 nights or so and plan on talking to at least 2 new people a night, start small then go bigger as you become more confident

your gunna have to force yourself to break away from being shy

Answer 27

Part of being shy, at least as I remember from school, was the fear of saying/doing something "stupid", that'd make you seem uncool. So the first thing is to not stress out so much about that. If you are so concerned about acting cool while talking to someone, you're gonna mess up and do something dopey, trust me. Just relax and be yourself. You're bound to have cool stories or experiences (even if you don't think so), so just get in on conversations, and when something you can talk about comes up, pipe in. DON'T force it. Just wait.

In the meantime, go around your neighborhood and talk to strangers (nice looking strangers, not creepy ones). Strike up random 5 minute conversations about the weather, bugs, flowers... whatever. Just get used to talking to people. It'll help.