How would I improve this sonnet if needed? Opinions please, be harsh!

Question

Across the night sky, in the pitch black, was laid,

She was set against the backdrop of the sky,

He in the ocean of the unknown pooled her to fade,

Her light burned bright, his pupils pierced to stay.

The distances of the galaxies whether far or near,

Meant to him a vast nothing. She belonged to him,

From some life earlier, image of her brought a tear,

He knew they were linked in love from that dream.

He'd place a wish once night fell, hoping for their love to be uncovered,

Yearning she would descend from the sky for everyone to see, promising of becoming more,

More than just star-crossed lovers.

For her to land in his outstrectched arms for ever eternity.

He longed for this wish to come true, as for her to be his one true mate.

He having faith this would be, his eternal fate.

the lines are messed up, but they are right, the copy and paste messed it up.

Answer 1

select the subject matter for your sonnet

divide the theme of your sonnet into two sections

present your first section as a thought to the reader

in the second section present the climax or conclusion

compose your first section as three quatrains,3 stanzas of 4 lines each

write the 3 quatrains with an a-b  a-b c-d c-d e-f e-f rhyme scheme;

a/and with old woes,new wail my dears time past

b/i sigh the lack of many a thing i sought

a/.and with old woes new wail my dears times waste

b/then i can drown an eye,unused to flow

c/for precious friends hidden in deaths dateless night

d/and weep afresh love longs cancelled woe

c/and moan the expense of many a vanished sight

d/then can i grieve at grievances forgone

e/and heavily from woe to woe  tell o'er

f/the sad account of fore bemoaned maon

e/which i new pay if not paid before

compose the l;ast section as a couplet,this time use a g-g rhyming scheme

g/but if the while i think on thee dear friend

g/all losses are restored and sorrows end