How would a dad get full custody of his son?

Question

My friend's wife just left him out of nowhere for another man, she got a new job and now has an affair with her boss. She has a 1 year old baby with my friend, now she abandoned him for 1 week so far, today she checked herself into a hospital saying she was depress and wanted to kill herself.... He works, he is putting in more hours to support the baby, the baby is staying with him, he doesnt make a LOT of money but makes enough for him and the baby. Her family wants HIM to get custody of the baby, What can he do to start? He will be consulting a lawyer soon. But is there a way he can get additional help? He is also a legal resident of the US, he has a green card. She is an American citizen. Today she said she has a history of depression when she tried to kill herself, so they checked her into the hospital.

Answer 1

am a dad who recently was awarded custody of his son under somewhat similar circumstances.  there is only one way, he must file for divorce and go through the courts.  if he has concerns about his child's welfare, his lawyer can request a judge to perform certain actions (such as a protective order or temporary custody order).  It is a little better for men than it used to be and the courts are very sensitive to about protecting the child.  if she has committed herself recently, that would be important to a judge.  divorce is a painful and lengthy process, but it is the only way for a dad to assert his rights in protection of a child.  as the child's mom, she could take the kid anywhere, anytime as long as they remain married.

Answer 2

There you go, the lawyer will tell him everything he needs to know. We arent lawyers (for the most part?) so we have no idea. Tell him good luck.

Answer 3

He needs a good family law attorney.  The atty may suggest getting an emergency temporary custody order in light of the severe depression, leaving the child with him, and her other issues.  Obviously *she* thinks he's a good parent or she wouldn't have left the baby with him.  He needs to do everything his lawyer says, including telling about any depression she had during the marriage.  And if his family wants to help, they can be free child care and take up a collection for the lawyer.  He needs to get a copy of her med. diagnosis and a copy of her hospital admission since somewhere on there it will say that she's 5150 (CA code for "danger to self or others") and if the court sees that diagnosis it shouldn't have a problem giving dad custody.  I'd also tell the court in my declaration that I did a lot at home, I helped care for the baby (fed/bathed/all the stuff) so the court knows he's a hands-on dad.  You can say that as her depression worsened, you did more and more at home thinking that maybe she was just overwhelmed, and you wanted her to have less stress.  

Right now dad's stable, mom isn't and doesn't know what she wants, so it's better for the baby to be with dad and have short visits with mom.  The lawyer can tell you whether things are so bad that you should ask for her visitation to be supervised, since depressed mothers often take the kid with them when they commit suicide.

Good luck to dad and the baby!