How would i tell my baby about his daddy?

Question

im 16 and got pregnant by my boyfriend of almost two years, as soon as he found out i was pregnant he wanted nothing to do with me if i didnt abort and his family felt the same way. then he got another girl who hes still with! this upsets me a lot. we havent talked in months when i called him last week to tell him the baby is healthy he hung up and told me before he wants nothing to do with the baby or me and even one time said he hopes me and the baby die in labor... i dont think hes going to change, especially since his family supports his idea i abort... when my baby goes.. wheres daddy with his little noddle fathers day card.... what do i say?!?! i was thinking of saying daddy lives far far away, but he doesnt he lives less than ten minutes away... but i dont want to be like daddy didnt want you either...

Answer 1

BOYS this age are just scared and dont know what to do. They dont want a child interfering in their plans. My mom got pregnant with me when she was 14!! she kept me and raised me on her own. I met my father when i was 8 we havent  spoke aince then when he denied paternity, (he was 99.9% the father) To this day my mom and i have a strong bond. I am so grateful that she had the strength to raise me. Someone else will come along and be willing to love and support that baby as their own. The love of a child is more powerful than yhe love of any man, it's life should never be put to test just because a man isnt ready to stand up..  I am now 21, and  have 2 kids they mean the world to me.Good luck

Answer 2

First thing you need to go after your ex with child support. They do a dna test and then court order to pay child support. No matter want he can't get away with responsibility of that child. Tell the child the truth when your child asked about where it daddy. I have a four year old son that his father has nothing to do with him. But he got court order to pay child support  He doesn't ask about his father at all. he a mommy boy..

Answer 3

Be honest with him/her without being negative.  You are young and will meet someone that will take care of you and your baby.  I was 17 when I had my daughter and her father was 22 and didn't do anything for her.  I started dating someone when she was 2 and that's her daddy.  you will do fine with out him.  Just don't bad mouth the father in front of your baby, they could resent it later.  Good luck

Answer 4

okay first of all, don't let him get off the hoook that easy.

you go file for child support and it doesn't matter how old he is, he made that baby and he has to take care of that baby. he's young right now so of course he's ignorant so your job as a mother is to stand your ground and right now your like what the h**l do you do, what are you suppose to do and my best advice to you is live each day of your life, as if your living for your child. call and talk to him and let him say thoses ignorant words to you and record his dumb self and take him to court and file for sole legal and physical custody of your child. and i guarantee you that you will get that. as far as a daddy goes. girl your going to have to be mommy and daddy. its not easy believe me when i say that but its a part of life when we choose to have children without being married. we have to make that sacrifices. above all don't lie to your child because they will eventually find out the truth. tell your child about they're father.

DONT BAD MOUTH

just  explain it to them that daddy loves him/ her very much just can't be with them right now and that they're thinking about him/ her every moment of the day and as they get older just ease the situation onto them that some familes have just mommys some families have just daddy and some families have both and he's just a part of a family that has a mommy.

Answer 5

tell your baby when he gets older the truth

Answer 6

I agree with teh second poster, don't even mention 'daddy' if he doesn't want to have anything to dow ith the baby, he's not the baby's daddy. Just don't even bothre.

Answer 7

You tell him "some families have one mommy and no daddy, some families have a daddy and no mommy, some have a mommy and a daddy, some have 2 mommies, some have 2 daddies."

He wont be the only one by FAR, so don't feel like he'll be singled out and alone!!

And I really really hope you're going to file for child support!!!!  Or kick him in the balls, one or the other!

Answer 8

I had my son at 17 and at the time there was no daddy around. When he was about 4 months my gorgeous partner stepped in and my son now knows him as daddy :) I will tell him when he is old enough to understand that he has two daddies but the other one went away before he was born.

Answer 9

i'm in my 40's with a teenager.  we have been dealing with this for the last 15 years.  he dad has never been a part of her life.  this is what you do.  say some good things about his dad.  like my daghter got his eyelashes.  never speak evil about him.  never talk bad about him.  tell him the truth.  hold him when he crys and tell him that we all have a father up in heaven.  buy the time my daughter was in middle school she had kids comming up to her telling her that their parents were divorcing and their dads didnt talk to them anymore.  she basically dont care for her dad but she understands that God dont give us anymore then what we can handle and she has been a very emotionaly strong young lady and i am very proud of her.

Answer 10

A lot of people are saying to not let him off the hook and to make him pay child support.  But do you really want this man being involved in your life for another 18 years.  What people don't think about is that if he is court ordered to pay this money to you and is put on the birth certificate then that means at any point in his life he can decide he wants to start seeing the child... and by that point it might not be in the best intrest of your child or you for him to become involved!  You will more than likely have another man... who can adopt your baby and then when your child gets older you can have the talk with him about his father.  My sister in law was in your exact position when she was 18.  The father wanted her to abort she said no way s***w you and is now married to my brother and they have three other children.  Her son calls my brother dad he is 8 now... and still hasn't even asked about his real father... they will tell him soon though.  She didn't get child support and she had him sign over his parental rights so that he could be completly out of her life and her sons life forever... since that is what he chose!  Leave the guy on the curb... raise your baby or give it up for adoption... they have wonderful programs where you can get to know the family before and choose who you want your baby to go to.  Only you know what is right for you so do your research and good luck... pray pray pray and God will guide you!

Answer 11

Firstly, this guy is a major jerk.

Secondly, I wouldn't even mention the word 'daddy' to your baby, unless he/she brings it up when they are older, when you can say the 'he lives across the other side of the globe' thing.

Good luck to you, I wish you all the best.

Answer 12

Be strong! Get child support! Love your baby with your whole heart! Pray and ask God what to say and what to do, so that everything will work out in the best way for you and your baby! I will pray for you! Continue to be strong and don't let any one or anything get you down! GOOD LUCK!