I'll just state some facts and observations and you tell me how you would react:
- My friend of almost 15 years never returns my phone calls, all my voice mails are ignored. She only calls me when it's her idea to talk, if I call her I get voice mail.
- She rarely sends me a personal email, usually it's just junk she's forwarding to a bunch of people at once.
- She lives 10 mins from where I do but I see my friends who live out of state more often than her. I haven't talked to her on the phone or seen her since Christmas.
- She has 2 kids but she's not working. I understand raising kids is a full time job but wouldn't she like to meet me for coffee for some grown up conversation? If I email or call her and ask to get together I get no response. When it's her idea, I jump at the chance to see her and her kids. Well, up until 2 months ago when I started ignoring her in return.
- Since Christmas she sent me very few meaningful emails and I got no phone calls from her, yet she invited me to her one year old's birthday party. So I'm only invited around when it's time to bring gifts for her kids? I thought that was pretty gauche. Maybe I'm a high maintenance friend but I would hope she would have made time for me in the 6 months between Christmas and the kid's party. I didn't RSVP and I didn't go.
- I feel like she always meant more to me than I meant to her. I went to college out of state after high school and getting her to write me or email me was like pulling teeth. She would be out of touch for long stretches of time, and then I'd finally get her on the phone and we'd talk for 3 hours. But who has 3 hours to spend on the phone all at once? I can't do that anymore.
- Some of our friends in high school always said she likes to play hard to get but I never believed them until this past year. I think she likes to be chased, called, emailed, and asked out, and the less she responds the more persistent her friends will get...for a time...until like me they quit.
- At her other child's birthday parties I've been to, I'm the only non-family member there. I used to think I was privileged to be the only person outside her family that was invited, but once I thought about it I realized I may not be the only friend invited, but I'm the only one who shows up.
Now she's been emailing me (a few personal emails that I've ignored and a few forwarded stupid emails) and she leaves me voice mails and I haven't called her back. I'm really bitter toward her but if I tell her this I don't know if anything would change, I'm single and she's married with kids and a house etc so we have different lifestyles now. Should I be up front with her and tell her how I feel or should I continue to let the friendship die?
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