How would you handle this with your boss?

Question

My new boss called me into her office yesterday and said that she doesn't feel she gets respect from me(yelling) and that if I am so unhappy with my job I should quit. That I have an attitude and that if I am going to walk around like a b**ch and I said did you just really call me that and I left her office. she ran after me apologizing saying she was wrong-she just heard some bad news about her mom-and she know she shouldn't say that. blah blah.....I am in a union. They said that I would have to go to the police(university) and file a complaint which I don't want to do. Do I talk to her boss.confront her and tell her it is not acceptable. Need advice....

Answer 1

This is a union, document it, write it all down, date, time, witness, it is a violation.  

Answer 2

You file a grievance with the union.  You have to get it on record.  No going to her boss.  Follow the procedure.  It is there for a reason.

Answer 3

You need to raise this with HR. Get it on record.

Otherwise it will be your word against hers.

Do it now. If there were witnesses, so much the better.

Answer 4

Sounds like she needs some supervisor training. I would document that on paper and keep it. Everytime she acts inappropriate document it. If they try to fire you, you will have good records to show them and fight it. I would speak now with my union rep. Being called names is inappropriate and unprofessional and creates a hostile work enviroment. You need to tell her to stop, this is very important and document it when you do. Documentation as you can see is very important. Respect is something that needs to go both ways. You should respect her position and she should have the people skills to be a supervisor if shes going to be in that position.

Answer 5

if ur in a union then u should file a grievance for harrassment thru ur union rep..

Answer 6

no....forget the whole thing....she did apologize...have a heart....ive had bosses who would never do that!

Answer 7

I would take it up with the union.  If you let it slide she might do this to you again.  Let her get the punishment she deserves.

Answer 8

First of all if your boss tells you this, then you should step back and see how you act at work. If you do act like this at work then you deserve it and should take it up as a warning to change. I worked with someone who always had an attitude, very rude and always caused problems within the department, and it made everyone else uncomfortable at work. Your co-workers do not deserve that kind of treatment from you or anyone that acts like that!  

Answer 9

I would document everything she said to you....dates and times...Then speak with a higher manager then her...This is not acceptable at all and she should be fired for the way she talked to you not to mention highly unprofessional...

Answer 10

if you are able to let it go. you shouldn't confront her because you already made your point clear by walking out of her office. i would give her a chance to start over with you. if she makes the same mistake, then go to her boss.

Answer 11

1 word.

Blackmail.

okay...2 words.

Raise & Blackmail.

This "boss" is in total violation and the company could be sued for that behavior.

Answer 12

I don't know how you are treating her for he r to confront you like that..  Are you respectful?  

Either way, I would take the matter to her boss 1st.  let her handle it.  Your boss was way out of line.  No one deserves to cursed out at work.

And it doesn't matter why she did it, the point is that she did it.

But I wouldn't confront her, it could make it more messy.  

Answer 13

Talk to your boss.  Tell her you are sorry she feels disrespected and ask her for examples of how you have shown her that.  Tell her you do respect her and her authority and would really like to know how you can improve.

But also be clear with her that her actions were wrong.  We all have things in our personal lives and you want to support her, not be an outlet for her frustrations.  Ask if she really feels disrespected, or if it was based on being understandably under alot of pressure from the bad personal news she received.  

Just have a mature adult conversation with her.  Make it clear you don't want to go to the union, or police.  You want to be able to work out the problems between the two of you.

Answer 14

Handle the situation with tact and diplomacy. Sit down with your new boss and discuss the matter seriously and honestly. In any given workplace there is such a thing as "organizational hierarchy" but there is also what we call the "equal employment opportunity". So, somehow you are both in equal footing... Harmony in a workplace should be everyone's concern like a team with one goal.  

Answer 15

You can and should report your boss's behavior.  No matter how bad of a day she is having, she doesn't have the right to take it out on you - it's unprofessional.

Go ahead and write a very neutral, factual, non-emotional, non-subjective report.  Just stick the facts and use direct quotes when possible.  (and please, use punctuation - run-on sentences are very hard to follow.)

Then talk to her boss (your boss's boss).  Repeat exactly what you put in the report.  Do not view it as a "confrontation" or "demand" anything - you're simply informing her of the details, and requesting that she respond in accordance with the company's harassment policy.  Ask to be informed about what steps she will take to resolve this situation.

Your boss probably won't get fired, if this is her first offence.  But she will get a warning, and a note of it will be made in her record.  Be careful about putting anything in writing yourself (in a report or email) - this can sometimes come back to haunt the innocent party.  Be very careful to stay neutral - you can say that you were upset, uncomfortable, thought it reflected poorly on the company... but if you make it personal you lose your credibility.

Answer 16

Go to HR and file a complaint.

Answer 17

She apologized.

Keep it documented but cut her some slack.

If she does it again go further.

Right now you have her "over a barrel" so to speak.

You can turn it into a good relationship or you can blackmail her with it.

She didn't call you in the office and fire you for what she thinks is a bad attitude or whatever.

Give her a break too but take care not to let it become a cycle of outbursts and apologies.

Answer 18

If you like the job... I would go talk to the boss and straighten things out... but if you are planning on changing the job in the near future... write her up... obviously she was trying to be a ***** to you, why dont you be a ***** to her too... :)  

Answer 19

For now, I would accept her apology, but since you do have a union rep., I would let him or her know of the incident to "go on record", just in case there is any further action needed to be taken later.  

Answer 20

tell her how you feel, how she shouldnt take her personal problems out on you. also tell her that you will try yo be better and do this in a good manner. just talk to her and be nice to her, she is going through a ruff time.