How young is to young to get married?

Question

I have been told I'm way to young to be thinking about marriage/engagement? I'm 3 months away from 21 and my boyfriend is 22. Is that to young? Been together almost 5 years. Living together 1 year and about 8 months. Wedding wouldn't be for 2-4 years after he asked no matter when that is....

Answer 1

so you've been together almost 5 years and living together. i say you get married soon. because what happens is that you just get used to living together and playing the husband and wife role and you'll end up dating for years and years before you know it you'll be dating for 8 years. i'm a firm believer in not living with the person and not having s*x with them till marriage. because it adds value to ur marriage once u do get married. okay so i assume ur paying bills together, cooking for eachother, having s*x etc. then when u get married, you'll just go to the same life. it wont be any different. just the title of mr. and mrs. i dated a Marine for 2 years, we broke up for 4 months because of some drama and straightened out our walk with Christ, and got our priorities straight. he proposed last night and we're saving s*x for marriage. its harder because we were having s*x for 2 years but we know its an investment into our marriage. he's leaving for iraq in a few weeks and i'm visiting him and we havent had s*x at all! and for those who think he's getting it from somewhere else, my man is a God-fearing man who puts God before anyone and anything. so he knows not to be sleeping around. not just because of hurting me but mostly because of sinning before God. anyway i dunno what ur beliefs are but thats what i believe. get married. even if its in court then u can plan a big wedding. dont let it draaaaag on for years.

Answer 2

i say as long as you are old enough to legally drink a glass of champagne at your wedding and you are willing/ready for the life long commitment of marriage, then you are ready

Answer 3

Your not to young but since your not going to get married for 2-4 years why even get engaged. I does put a little more pressure on your relationship. Just wait. Good luck to you both.

Answer 4

"Too Young" is hard to put a number on.  If the would be bride or groom is not ready for that kind of commitment, then it is to young.  I was married when I was 20 and my husband was 22.  We were both mature enough and ready for marriage.  Don't let others tell you what is too young, you and your boyfriend have to decide that for yourselves.  

Answer 5

There is no age limit.

You just both have to be mature enough, and ready for marriage.

After five years and living together for nearly 2 years, I don't think that it's to early for you two to decide that you want to be together.

But I think that before you have an actual wedding, you should be sure that you are able to deal with things like planning a wedding, buying a house together, having kids together and all that.

I think that if you feel you're ready, then you probably are.

I don't think 21 and 22 is too young. It really depends on the person. My parents were married at 17 and 18, and have been together for over 30 years (actally i think it's getting closer to 40, but i'm not keeking track). I am 19 though, and I haven't ever been in a real, serious relationship.

I think you're being very sensible waiting untill you're sure you have enough money.  

Answer 6

as long as the wedding isn't rushed...and you take premarittal counseling...then i think there isn't an age that is too young.  I'm thinking under 21 is kind of young though...But you won't get married for 2-4 years so you are fine.

Answer 7

Age is nothing but a number, but looking at your situation I would say that you're not too young. The fact that you're even questioning it shows your maturity. :)

Answer 8

20 is too young, but 21 you are officially legal to purchase anything in the United States (thats legal) lol. So I figure thats the age to atleast turn to get married. Just be prepared, have a good reliable career set up, something to fall back on incase you get into trouble, and be mature. If not.... DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT

Answer 9

I've known forty year old's "too young".

It's whenever you feel like you've lived enough life being single that you are ready to accept the responsibilities of married life.

Answer 10

There is no problem with being engaged at your age, If this is what the two of you want than do it.

My aunt got married at 16, my mother got married at 19, both still married for more than 20 yrs and happy. Im planning on getting married soon too (18). As long as you havent been fighting and constantly breaking up than do it.

Answer 11

Some people will always be too young to get married!  :-)

I know people who have gotten married at 35 and it didn't work out, and I know people who were 19 and it did work. (and the other way around, too).

As long as both parties are legal and consenting, it's really your business. But please make sure that you're ready..jitters are normal, all-out fear is not. And planning/thinking ahead like you are now is definitely a good thing. Good luck to you!

Answer 12

I don't think it's to young. I've been dating my fiance for five years. I'm 20, about 6 months away from 21 and he's 22. were planning on getting married May 2nd of 2009. People will always have their two cents. Just do what you think is right in your heart and you feel comfortalbe with :) Seems to be your going about things well.  

Answer 13

It really depends, every person is different.  Some people at 21 are mature enough to get married.  Some are not.  One thing I will say, is don't listen to other people, you and your boyfriend are the only people who know if you are ready or not.  

Answer 14

If you are looking for an age as an answer, their is none. "Too young" can only be defined as a maturity level. I have known some people to get married at 18, be mature & know exactly what they want. Then again, I have known some to get married at 35, but be totally immature & not really know what they are looking for out of it.

If you have been together for that long & loving together for a year, then I would say that you are definitely mature enough to get married. Some people rush into it without realizing if the person they are with is really the right one for them & also without finding out if they can deal/live with them on a day to day basis.

I believe that these people have told you that you are "too young" soley due to your age and not realizeing that you both know you want to be with eachother & do not have to go out & see what's out there first. Don't listen to them. If you are ready, you are ready. Also, do not feel like you HAVE to wait that long after getting engaged to get married. It's your life & if you want to wait then let that be your decision, not one that you feel you are doing only to please others.  

Answer 15

It's a bit of a cliche but age is just a number, some 21 yr olds are very grown up whilst others are laughably juvenile. I would suggest that you forget your ages, and instead basically try, as best you can, to forecast how you would consider your first 5-10 or so years of marriage [probably not practical to look much further ahead than this] panning out if you did tie the knot.

People do inevitably change over time as their circumstances change, meaning that two people who are extremely compatible at 21 may be much less so at [say] 25. The sorts of things that might commonly lead to you growing apart or falling out are:

(1) one or both of you wanting to make a radical change in career;

(2) similarly one of you wanting to move to another [part of the] country;

(3) you having different attitudes towards bringing up kids & so on.

Answer 16

I personally wouldn't get engaged now if you're going to wait 2-4 years. But that's just me - why not wait until you're actually ready and able to get married?

I do think 21 is young... The reason I say that is because I've changed SO much since I was 21 (I'm now 28) and have done SO many things since then that I never would've done if I'd been married.

But, if that's what you really want, then do it. Just make sure you've done everything you want to do before you get married. My best friend got married at 22 and she's now getting divorced because her husband feels he missed out on "life" and is leaving her to "do his own thing." (His words.)

Good luck!

Answer 17

people are never too young to get married as long as they know what is right. Back in the old days (my parents) both got married at 17 years old and are still together.

You are also both living together so the only thing that will change is a piece of paper