Huge Famliy Problem...?

Question

My boyfriend and I are expecting our first child! I'm due September 3rd, and our families are so excited for their first grandbaby to be here. Only there's a HUGE problem for me,...I don't really feel comfortable with his mom's side of the family. I'm not a judgemental person or "stuck-up", but I was raised a completley different way. His mom curses at her children, the kids and mother are yelling and screaming all the time, the mom has drug/alcohol problems, and the list pretty much goes on. If that's the way they choose to live, well that's fine for them I guess, but I don't want to be around that and I def. don't want my daughter being around any of that. What do I do?

Answer 1

Your in a tough spot.

You didn't like his families behavior before you got pregnant but you still continued to become pregnant. Your going to have to tell your boyfriend that you don't want to bring your baby around his family. He probably won't understand because you obviously go around his family currently.

If you really had such a huge problem with his family you wouldn't have stayed together. Oh but you love him? When a relationship is serious and the chances of having to raise a child together increases most educated women look at the entire picture. Your stuck with a probably great bf with a low class family. Your going to have to deal with raising a child in that enviroment.

Also, what happened to getting married?!? Obviously your parents are such high moral people. Get married.

Answer 2

I have this problem with my fiance, luckily his family lives 3 1/2 hours away, so we go to visit only for 2 days max. and I try to keep her at his grandma's because she is a sweet old lady, and if they want to visit they come to his grandma's house so it is not as bad. And I stay there the whole time so I know what is going on. It is very hard when families are so different.  I just flat out told my fiance that I was not comfortable with some of the things that go on with his family and They could either come see us at my house for a while then go back to their hotel, or we can go there and visit while I monitor. I don't really like it still but I try to give as much as possible. Good luck! Oh and don't listen to anyone that says you should have thought of that, like you shouldn't love someone or have kids with them based on their families, what a stupid thought.

Answer 3

Talk to your husband... I mean boyfriends... s**t.  

He has a say in the child's life also.  The two of you together will decide how much his mother's side of the family will be seeing the child... and under what conditions.

Answer 4

I take it your not living with her , I try to raise mine as well as i can and there is a long road ahead for you to be able to do what you want , it isnt like its a daily basis is it? if it is move a little bit away ,it isnt just family that infulence kids its other kids and schools etc its too early to be worrying about that just enjoy your baby coming now

Answer 5

you should have thought about that before getting pregnant.  the kid will needs to be involved with all the family, so you might have to make quick short visits with grandma.