Husband found pictures of myself I sent to another man on email. How can I bounce back from this?

Question

I know it was wrong, and they were not nude, but they were in my bathing suit. He is mad, but has yet to really express his anger. He says he just doesn't understand it. I didn't plan on hooking up with the guy, i think i did it just to get attention. My husband provides that ,but you know how a man likes to get complimented by other women, i feel that was the same reason. I have remained calm, he too, and i have answered all the questions he asked. My question is, how do i bounce back from this. Have i messed up our trust forever or will he be angry for awhile. I know you don't know him or our relationship, but how would you react in this situation and any women been through this? I am such and IDIOT!

Answer 1

u made a real bad decision and i think if the oppertunity presents itself again you wld do something like this AGAIN. this is because you clearly dont take your marriage seriously which is the only reason you did that in the first place. there is no excuse for it, it may seem minor to most but realize that this is actually a GATEWAY to larger things. to now close this gate you must tell your husband the truth and try to change ur outlook on your relationship with this man. if he is a truly great husband he wld respect you telling the truth after realizing it must have been hard for you. also, realize you made a promise to god. IT IS BETTER NOT TO VOW THAN TO VOW AND NOT PAY - biblical extract.

Answer 2

I wouldn't trust you after that. He is probably thinking you cheated on him, and in a way, you did. You will be lucky if he doesn't give up on the marriage and forgives you.

Answer 3

Everyone on here should stop beating you up, EVERYONE makes mistakes and we all do irresponsible things at times. Just take it day by day, time is the best healer. Sit down and tell your husband why you did it and how it made you feel doing it. Assure him it was a huge mistake, tell him how bad you feel and let time heal all your wounds. Good luck. And don't take anything personal anyone on here has to say, they don't know what you are going through. ♥

Answer 4

Oooh I'm tell-in ... oh he knows already.  Well Ms. Send your picture to another man, you are doing the right thing by taking responsibility for your actions and remaining calm.  Now you need to communicate with your husband and perhaps just be honest and tell him you are not sure why you did but you feel you need someone to tell you "hey babe you're hot!" - I don't know how long you have been married but maybe all the stuff your husband and you did to get each other came to a stop.  Do you plan trips - I think a short romantic get-away would be a great start.  If you stay at home find a way to pay for trip yourself and plan it according to his schedule.  I'd ask him what can I do to help restore his trust in me and refrain from arguing and agree to put this 1 small incident behind you.  Maybe you wanted to get caught because you really do love your husband.  And, most of all "Step away from the Computer" --------- (after you read my answer of course)  - good luck Sweetie, I think you be fine.

Answer 5

first of all put yourself in his shoes.  how would you feel.  

Answer 6

You need to tell him why.  Why will always be in his head.  He may not trust you as much, but lets hope he doesnt try to get you back. I believe you need to show him your feelings for him. He's hurt and possibly insecure.  He may feel he isnt doing his job well.  Keep reminding him how much you love him . give it time...

Answer 7

My husband did the same thing to me.  I just wish I could know 100% that that is all he did.  I don't think he cheated but now I don't trust him and I check up on him frequently.  I assume that your husband is feeling the same way.  Stress to him that you were only looking for compliments and that it meant nothing.  Tell him you know it was stupid and you will never do it again...and then DON'T do it again!

Answer 8

I can tell you from experience that he will probably forgive you, but every time you argue, he will bring it up.  He might not tell you, but it will bother him for a while.  My boyfriend had pictures that I found that some other girl had sent him (her in lingerie).  I was devastated.  I totally didn't see it coming and I never thought he was the type of guy who would do that.  I know that he never slept with her, but for her to have sent those pictures, I am sure that they had some inappropriate conversations.  This all happened back in February, and it still comes up.  It has taken away part of my trust, and sometimes I feel like I sort of let him get away with it since I have forgiven him and did not break up with him or leave (at least for the night).  But I guess he will just have to make a conscious decision to forgive you and to not bring it up in fights after he does.  As for you, you will have to comply with his requests not to talk to other men online, and so on.  I know that ever since this happened, it drives me nuts always wanting to know who he is talking to online, and I just want to go through his computer searching for more pictures.  It helps that he always tells me who he is talking to.

Good luck and don't do it again!

Answer 9

I'm sure he will be mad for a long while.  You will have to earn his trust again.  Don't ever do any thing so foolish again.  If you want attention, get from your husband.  If you have a need to e-mail a picture of yourself to some one, send it to your husband.

Answer 10

Well.. I'm going to have to see these pictures in order to give constructive advice.. jk

Okay seriously.. trust is something that can be regained if you show remorse and actually commit to not doing something like this again.  It will take time and he may be a little cold at first, but it is something that you can move past.  It's just going to take some time.

Answer 11

A man likes to get complimented by other women, but he's not going to go fishing for compliments if his wife/gf gives him all the attention he wants (assuming that he's the GOOD kind of man).

As repentent as you are and as calm about this as the both of you seem to be, I think that you might be able to get past this.

I'm getting an idea here.  What if one day he's at work, and you send him an e-mail saying that you're so, so sorry, complete with NUDE pics of you looking both apologetic and seductive? ;)

Answer 12

You wouldn't feel so bad if you were not caught.  I'm sorry, but you deserve whatever you get.  Hopefully you husband is a very forgiving person.

Answer 13

well i'm glad that you've realized where u went wrong, and thats the first step, some ppl don't reach there ever, so that's good for you, but in terms of him forgiving u, i have no idea if he will, b/c i d k ur man, but if he's the forgiving type, he may, but i suggest that u learn from this mistake, and don't repeat them again! He may not be this forgiving the next time around!

Answer 14

Throw your hand in is face and just say "whateva" over and over and over.......................................

Answer 15

it's over.............this will haunt you for life........

get out..........better yet, let him out........

divide you assets by 2 and get out.......

you have  torpedoed your own boat.......you haven't drowned yet........but your relationship is on life support.........

don't try to patch it up.......it's over.......

this will bite you in the a$$ time and time again.......

for the rest of your life.........

pull the plug........move on.........

i'm not judging you.........i'm telling you, your relationship is terminal........

don't turn up prego either.........

Answer 16

How many accounts do you have?. It seems that you have enough accounts to give everyone thumbs down. That's NOT cool at all. Just  like what you did to your husband wasn't cool at all either.  

Answer 17

Yeah, I dunno, it would have been pretty embarrassing if my husband found any of my private e-mails or anything like that. I guess I would just talk about it with him and explain the best I could, then hope that he will not make it a bigger deal than it really is.

Answer 18

I would have you pack your stuff. Who am I to stand in between you and your desire...I would say...see ya and don't let the door hit you on the way out! Take Care

Answer 19

you remind me of my ex..... i really look down upon people like you. shame!

i feel for your husband i really do.. i can feel his pain,.. and you guys are married too that makes it so much worse... the pain that he must be carrying around in his heart must be heavy,.. you see, this is how guys end up getting run over or hit by buses ,.. this is how it all starts.  

Answer 20

Girlfreend, thats so wrong....You cant be sending pics to other men. You so crazy......

Answer 21

Keep your legs closed.

That makes you real bouncy.

Answer 22

You made a mistake and it seems that you are stepping up to the plate.

Just reassure him (and yourself) that you will steer clear of the internet (where men are concerned) and that you will work on your self esteem issues.

Good luck.

Answer 23

this is how cheating starts, you find what you want and are not getting in someone else, i think you should be glad you got caught. if not- would you have stopped? you need  to let your man know that you are missing something in the relationship...... attention!! and you know- if you are nothing getting it from one, you will go to another, get  some help- marriage counseling might do the trick,its going to be awhile until he comfortable trusting you, but maybe never fully if you are on the internet, he may always be prepared now.but don't feel so bad, it had to happen.maybe you two will get closer now that the truth is out, he now understands you are able and willing to find a man who will give you the attention you need, if he is unable to provide. so its telling you both to step up your games if the relationship is going to be long term. good luck, and remember -you didn't cheat, but could have, not make the same mistake twice, it sound like you want this to work, so do that,

Answer 24

You need professional help - what a sick thing for a married woman to do.