Hypnotherapy & anger management - success stories?

Question

My husband is taking the step to have hypnotherapy sessions for anger management. It is an issue that has ruined our marriage & his relationship with our kids. I want to be supportive but I know he and he alone can only make the changes to get better. Has anyone here had experience with this (or had a partner who went through it?) How successful was it & did it change the ways & behaviours of the person?

Answer 1

It is great that your husband is taking the steps to overcome his problems with anger. Many people with issues around anger will continue to lash out at the world. It may take many years for such people to acknowledge that the problem is not really “the world” or with the family or spouse. It is more of an internal issue that needs to be addressed. Sure, there are problems with the world, but we don’t need to be always dealing with it through anger.

It’s VERY important for your husband to work a therapist he feels very comfortable with. Also, he should trust that the therapist is very good at what he/she does. If that bond is there, really positive changes can happen.

Hypnotherapy can certainly be helpful for anger management. First it is important to find the right kind of hypnotist. Although many therapists blend one technique with another, there are 3 basic ways of doing hypnosis for anger issues. First is direct suggestion in which the hypnotist puts the client into “trance” and gives him suggestion after suggestion to relax and stay calm instead of resorting to anger. This can be helpful but, in my opinion, it is unlikely to lead to permanent change.

In the 2nd approach, the client is led back to the original event or events that caused him to have problems with anger. This could be a traumatic event or living in a family where anger was used frequently. Children generally learn by example, so they can learn that the way to deal with unpleasant events is to show anger. I can’t get into detail, but when a client discovers the original events that caused a problem, the doorway is open to make significant changes.

The last form of hypnotism is taken from Dr. Milton Erickson, a leading pioneer in new ways to do hypnosis. Briefly, Ericksonian hypnosis involves making indirect suggestions and using metaphors. For example, instead of yelling at your kids to clean the room, you might say, “Well if your room was cleaner, maybe we can do something special this weekend. Have you heard of any good movies?” That’s not a great example of this type of hypnosis, but it gives you a general idea.

Probably, your husband would benefit the most from the 2nd approach of going back to the original event that caused the problem with anger. Ericksonian hypnosis would be my 2nd choice, and last would be the direct suggestion. However, as I said before, one of the most important things is to work with a therapist you trust and feel comfortable with.

I hope this points you in the right direction.