I'm 13 and i had s*x a few months ago and my partners pregnant?

Question

what should i do should i just bail on her or actually do something for her and the kid.

but ive told her just to get an abortion but she wont.

what do i do.

plz. message me.

Answer 1

You are young it wasn't smart to have s*x without protection but it was a mistake.

You can't bail on being a father. You and her have to take full responsibility for your actions. What kind of guy would you be if you bailed on a baby. That's what gives men bad reputations.

Now you really need to tell your parents. The longer you wait the harder it will be to tell them. If you do you are already taking responsibility.

You have a few options.

Have her have the baby and put it up for adoption. Lots of families can't have children and you will be giving the baby a better life.

Have your parents help you on supporting a baby. Of coarse you will need to get a job too.

Get an abortion. I don't think you should resort to this one. Are you that afraid of being a father that you will kill your own baby.

Those are you options. Choose wisely because they will all haunt you for the rest of your life. P.S. est you don't have s*x until your older.

Answer 2

You were to immature/young to have s*x, you should take responsiblity. Abortion isnt the one way ticket to making everything better.

Answer 3

You are 13 so you should buckle down at school and work on getting a good education - this should be your total focus.  

Financially you cannot do anything for the baby until you start work and anyone would understand that.  

You will need to think about doing a job which will be in demand and should pay well in the future.  Try talking to the careers office and being realistic about your skill set and what you are interested in.

She has chosen to go ahead with the baby without you.  She has to take some responsbility for that and cannot have high expectations of a 13 year old in terms of financial assistance.

In future you need to use condoms - you cannot afford to make this mistake again.  

You parents will hit the roof but you need to tell them and her parents ASAP if she refuses to - the sooner you act the sooner you will both get the support you need with these decisions.  If neither sets of parents are approachable go to the school for help.  ACT NOW!!!!

Answer 4

I wouldn't say you had to stay with the girl but you should be there to help out.  

Obviously there isn't much you can do financially but she is going to need someone around her to a whole lot of support.

You really do need to tell your parents. They won't be happy but they are going to find out eventually so you may as well be honest and you might find they will be there to support you! (It will be their grandchild after all!)

Answer 5

this is comin from a 16 year old male

***** run like the wind LOL naw dogg ask for abortion she say no scare her a bit still dun work tell ur parents but pack ur bags jus in case they kik u out good luck

Answer 6

Wow that sucks for you man...

You need to get parents involved with this ASAP

If you dont things will get worser

Your parents need to talk to her parents.

You cant ditch her...you cant get away, as soon as you turn 18 your time to pay up for child support

If i was the girl id get an abortion but idk she might really want one..

I know you made a mistake not using a condom but i understand..

Probably the most hardest thing ever to think about at your age..

Anyways good luck make the right decision

Answer 7

You need as much help and support as possible - from parents, counsellors, and your own friends. If you can't face telling your parents, perhaps someone you trust could act as a go-between?

Abortion is a difficult decision, but in this is a situation it might be preferable to giving both of you the responsibility of a baby at the age of thirteen.

Think positive - it is still possible to rebuild your lives and go on to be positive and happy - it will take time, but you'll get there.

Answer 8

its yoour mess just as much as its her mess! being pregnant at 13 is one thing, but forcing her to have an abortion is another. it should be her decision 2. if you do decide to support good on you if not then i think u should be more carful next time! especially i your not going to face the consequecnes. whatever you decide good luck but dont forget only you and your girl will know what is the right thing to do!

Answer 9

you need to realize that she is going through a really tough time now.  she has to face it.  if you care about her at all them you need to support her.  ask her what she wants to do and help her anyway you can.  if she wants to keep the baby don't try to talk her out of it.  if she gives it up or has an abortion because you talked her into it she could end up regretting it (and resenting you) for the rest of her life. you both made this baby and you should both be held responsible for it.  maybe think about getting a part time job to help pay for things that she will need.  both of your parents (hers and yours) are going to have to help out a lot cuz you definitely don't want to drop out of school.  if you want to give you kid a good life then you need to at least finish high school.  not only will you be better equipped to take care of the child but you will also be setting a good example for when the child grows up.  no matter what you do from now on you need to think about your baby and what is best for him/her.  it's a lot of responsibility for two 13 year olds, but it is not impossible especially if you have your families helping you guys out.  good luck and always be the best daddy you can be to your baby.  you want to know how to handle your girlfriend walking down the hallway w/ a baby?  just remember that it's harder on her.  she's probably wondering how she's gonna walk down that hallway with everyone staring at her and talking about her.  try to think about how she is feeling more than how you are feeling.  teen pregnancy is usually much harder for the girl than the guy.  walk down the hallway with her, holding her hand. and if you think that she could have been sleeping with other guys then you could always go on maury and get a dna test after the baby's born.

EDIT

i'm sure your parents would have some suggestions on what u can do to support your baby.

Answer 10

You are absolutely not ready to have a child and neither is she. I hate to be the one to suggest this, even though she does not want to, she need to get an abortion.

Look, on the bright side, she may not be. Trust me, i knew alot of girls like that in middle school, that love attention, she could be faking it.

Bottom line, tell her She does not want to have a 4 year old running around while she is getting ready for the Junior Prom!!!!!!!!  

Answer 11

It is no use all these guys telling you how stupid you were etc . The thing is you and this girl have started the creation of a new life and you arte both much too young to make a responsible position on your own

I know you are both feeling sorry for yourselves and worried about what will or might happen , but no 1 priority is the unborn baby

So the first thing you both do is get together for a chat , and then you go and tell both sets of parents , probably better to tell the girls first as they will probably end up with most of the responsibility

Only the parents can really make andy real decisions because neither of you is going to be in a position for several years on being able to financially support any child

Sure you have both made a mistake , like 1000's of others . You need to grow up fast now in terms of maturity and this can only start after you involve parents

I hope both sets of parents can accept the situation and work with both of you to help make this issue easier all round . I think you will find after the initial anger reality will kick in

Best of luck

PS

Suppose I don't need to tell you but make sure you find out where you can get some condoms before you have any sexual activity in future

Answer 12

aww that reaallyy sucks!! you deffinetly should not just leave her. that isnt fair. what you should do is tell both of your parents and decide what is best for the both of you. if she decides to get an abortion, respect her decision, and if it to keep the baby, go with and do the best that you cna. do you really wanna live life knowing that you left the poor girl ??

Answer 13

Abortion is horrible, but it's her choice

you have no say in it at all anymore

tell her you'll be there for her

don't ditch her

your kid will hate you if you do

Answer 14

God get some s*x Ed.

Right firstly don't you dare ask for a blood test to check if it's yours, that will only make everything worse both for you and the poor girl.

Secondly, go with her to the hospital or a clinic to find out the basics, then they can give you some imformation on how to deal with it.

Thirdly I suggest you get some sort of job to help support it, but as you are the kind of person who gets a girl pregnant at 13 I doubt you will get a job, you'll probably just start theiving and taking benefits and generally being a drain on society as a whole.

And lastly, FOR CRYING OUT LOAD GET SOME s*x EDUCATION, LEARN TO USE CONDOMS!!!

Answer 15

i think you know how foolish you have been - if you were mature enough to have s*x you should be mature enough to face the consequences.  talk to you parents.  be sensible and supportive.  there is no way you can financially support your baby at this age, but maybe your folks can help.

face it like a man.

Answer 16

And sadly you are reproducing well aleast you can teach your child about the wonders of condoms

Answer 17

I CAN PREDICT YOUR FUTURE YOU WILL BE ON THE JERRY SPRINGER SHOW WHEN YOUR SIXTEEN HAHAHAHAHAHA

Answer 18

Dude, if it were me. I'd probably bail. It's not the right thing to do, but it's going to be hard on you to get a job at 13. (But it's F$#%ed up making her deal with it alone though. But she'll get over it. Besides unless she's old enough to get a decent job to support herself plus one, she shouldn't have it. And she shouldn't pressure you, a 13 year old, do man up and be a father)

But who knows, I'm just some random guy online. Try talking to your parents about it or something like that.

Answer 19

This is why it's illegal for you to have s*x at your age. The worst thing you could do is run away on her. I personally think she's far too young to have a baby and perhaps an abortion might be better but if she's determined to keep it it's going to be hard enough without you running away. You've made your bed, now you can lie in it (oh no, woops you already did that).

You can start by telling your parents. And I hope she's told hers.

You can support her by offering to go to doctor's appointments with her and being there for her during her pregnancy. I don't know what you're going to do about money because you're not old enough to get a job.

Next time, use a bloody condom.

Answer 20

Well if she's pregnant because of you, you really need to take responsibility for it!

Answer 21

oh son ,the first thing you need to do is sit down with a neutral person and explain the problem to them be it a teacher a priest a councillor or even a grandparent you can't hide it for long because in most houses a mother knows her daughter is having her period so that's the first problem you need then to discuss it with both set's of parents it's no good pretending to be a little boy now you've entered the adult world with a shock whatever the parents decide you have togo along with because in the eyes of the law you aren't old enough to make decisions ,if you are in ant doubt that you are the father you should insist on DNA test however remember if you do this you are calling the mother of the baby a slapper who sleeps around and that could make the situation with her parents even worse ----so think through every move with maturity and logical thought -----good luck son - you have to face up to it now---always remember that in a lifetime this is only a hiccup

Answer 22

How old is yr partner? If she is over 18 then she could be prosecuted for child abuse. If she is under 18 and round about your age then she should get counselling to work out what is best for her. If she gets the abortion she may never recover from the trauma and feel a deep guilt for the rest of her life. There is the adoption angle as well. It may be hard to give the baby up, but in a few years time when you have had time to come to terms with it the child might want to find you and then you would have time to get to know him or her. It is better than looking back on the anniversary for years to come wondering what could have been

Answer 23

you know what you should do. you should go on google.com type in condom with all capital letters.(ex. CONDOM) scroll down to the before to last link on page 74. click it and once the page loads x it out

Answer 24

u caused this problem u should sort this out u need to stand by her and do whats right for her and the baby if u wasn't ready for a baby then u should have kept it in ur pants or at least used protection. everyone is nervous about becoming a farther but u will get the hang of it just be with her and make sure u help her out when she needs u

Answer 25

if u're 13 then she wont be pregnant because the pressure of the s***n getting out of ur p***s is not high to reach ur partner's uterus

and ur p***s wouldnt be large enough ..

so im sure she's not pregnant

Answer 26

I think you know that it would be very unkind to bail on her. This is much harder on her than it is on you.

Be kind - telling her to get an abortion isn't all that helpful, as it's her body and her choice and you need to be supportive. She must be scared like crazy right now.

You will need to give financial support later, but for now the best thing you can do is to give her reassurance and friendship.

You have to tell your parents - it's not easy, but you can't keep a thing like this secret - they'll be grandparents, after all.

Answer 27

you are both underage, suggest you get the parents involved soon as possible. This was more than irresponsible, considering that at 13 you are still a child. Both your parents will i am sure be livid, i know i would be.

You basically had s*x with an underage girl, suggest that you start growing up, if she can't/won't have a termination, then you have to be a man, and take responsibility, and there is no such thing as getting pregnant by accident. Having s*x is a two way street, suggest parents are the ones to advise, but don't expect them to be very happy about it.

Answer 28

erm.

wel your ****** basically if she dont get rid.

sit her down and have a proper chat, try and drill it into her head that your both too young and you havent got the finances to bring up a kid.

your both 13, so ya shouldnt really be having s*x anyway, but its too late for that now.

seriously man, try your hardest to pursuade her to get rid, and say you will support her whatever she decides to do (this might make her feel more comfortable knowing that you care etc)

but it might push her to getting rid of it, without you being forward about it, your kind of like coming round the side.

hope this helps mate

its not a nice feeling when this happens.

i know exactly what your going through. but i done all i can to pursuade her to get rid, the above is pretty much what i done. (although i was 17 at the time and i did have the finances, but didnt want a kid lol)

Answer 29

put yourself in her position. Would you want to be left alone? I mean, you are the one who got her preggers so its basically your fault too. I'm 15 and still proud to say I'm a virgin :)

Talk to your parents. Sorry to say, but honestly theres no other way to handle it.

Answer 30

i have an idea.

im almost 14, and if you keep this kid, your screwed. and if she WONT get an abortion, then be like, okay fine. but were putting it up for adoption.

there, give it to a couple that wants it.

Answer 31

I think you should stay with her - possibly tell her that you cannot commit as much as you want to now, but promise to look support her and look after the child when you are responsible enough.

GUYS STOP BEING SO HARSH - HE'S 13.

BE ENCOURAGING - CRITICISM WON'T HELP.