I'm 17. I want to get married a month after i turn 18.?

Question

people say I'm to young. They say to party but i don't like all that. I really love my boyfriend. we have gone thru so much and i think its our time to be happy. I will graduate from high school and keep going to college.

Answer 1

Yes you are young but if you and your boyfriend have been together for a long time and really love each other than it's your choice. I would just recommend getting engaged when you graduate then being engaged through your first year of college because it will put a lot of strain on your relationship. If you two can stay strong through that first year of college go for it. Just don't sell yourself short and make sure to live life whether its w/ him by your side or not. I didn't even find myself or truly know who I was until I was 20-21 and I had already been engaged and had a baby at 18. Now I'm 22 single mom the father is gone and I've just this year found that special man for me. I'm not saying he isn't "the one" I'm just saying think about all the things you might want to do in your life and if he is going to be ok w/ everything and support you then great! Just live life a little before you make that life altering walk. I hope it does work out!! High School sweetheart couples are the cutest especially when they have been married forever and beat all the odds!

Answer 2

I am not going to bring up your age but what have the parents said about the planned wedding? You are taking a lot on yourselves. Going to college and working to afford food, rent, tuition and books is going to be hard. I would ask you to continue to date but live at home.My son had friends who were engaged just out of high school but did not marry until they graduated from college. College is stressful enough without trying to keep a marriage going.    

Answer 3

You don't say how old your  boyfriend is.As long as you have your head screwed on right and like you said you will keep up school and studies and you truly know what love is and you are mature enough to be in a marriage and for it to last.Then by all means go for it and i wish all the luck and happines you deserve. All though you will be 18 when you get married so you don't need you parents permission it would nice to have them all on both you sides  and be supportive. if they aren't all ready.All the best.

Answer 4

Why rush to get married? You do not have to party. It will be nice to date as long as you can, go to college, save money, etc. I always tell my kids to do not leave until you are prepared. You can continue dating your boyfriend but marriage can put off a lot of things in your life. I am sure you both love each other and you will be there no matter what...so why the rush? It may feel right now but I always say people change and feelings change and it may not be right later. Also college will add some changes in your life as well as age and maturity. Good luck! Really think about it.

Answer 5

this is a big decision, lol i'm doing the same =]

i don't want to party, thats just wrong and uncalled for, just like my Fiance' believes in...

we talked to our parents and they are thrilled, because were going to be legal adults anyway, so no one can really have a say about what we want to do...

it's not easy starting out, after your out on your own, but me and my fiance' both have well paying jobs, we don't want children just yet, we have a lovely home to look foward too, just as long as your prepared and can handle adult duties, i don't think people should say a thing

goodluck =]

Answer 6

Go to college first, being to young isn't really the issue. Sometimes people that are 40 are to young to get married. There is a big secret adults don't want to tell you, sometimes, okay most of time, you don't know more because of your age. Sometimes adults of any age make mistakes, but they'd lead you to believe otherwise. If you have staying power in your relationship then you'll still be together when you get out of college.

Lots of things are going to change in the next few years, trust me.  

Answer 7

I got married at the age of 17, and have been married for 15 years, and love my husband dearly (and no it wasn't due to pregnancy!).  That being said, I do believe that marriage and life in general has been more of a struggle because of getting married at such a young age.  Not only are you learning who your husband is after marriage, but at that age you are learning who you are.  You think you have it all figured out when you are 17, 18, 19 years old, but once you hit about 25 you'll realize you really had no clue what you were doing.  Your boyfriend will feel the same way if he is also as young as you are.  I never had the chance to really get out on my own, have my own apartment, etc.  Those are all part of growing up and are things I feel I missed out on.  My husband is 5 years older than I am, and by the time we were married, he had been in the Navy and had traveled all over the world, whereas I was still living at home with my daddy!  

If you do decide to go against the grain and get married, please, at least go get some pre-marital counselling.  Also, don't have children for at least 3 or 4 years after getting married.  I recommend that to couples of any age, not just young ones.  You need those precious years to build a strong bond between you & your husband.  Having a boyfriend is NOT the same thing as having a husband!  Your relationship will have a whole new dynamic, and hopefully you will have a much stronger bond & committment to each other.  My husband & I waited almost 4 years to have our first child, and I am soooo glad we did.  We were more prepared financially, emotionally, mentally, & spiritually for a child at that point.

Good luck, whatever you decide to do.

Answer 8

i don't think it is wrong to get married at a young age i am 19 and i am engaged. We are getting married in 2010 so i will be 21 when we get married. But still one of my good friends got married right out of high school and she is doing ok. Yes it is hard and most people say it will not last. But if you have been with this guy for awhile and the two of you have been through the best and the worst i think you will be fine. The important thing is just to remember who you are, be considerate of each other, please don't walk into this marriage without reliable income and a plan of where you will live how you will pay bills, what will you do in case you get pregnant etc.  Please don't sacrifice your college, he should be right behind you from the finish to the end with your education it is so important. I know that you say that you are going to continue to college i am just saying no matter what happens stay in school! it is so worth it. Other than that honey people have been getting married at young ages for years so just have faith in your love and the strength of the relationship, make sure the both of you are mature enough and committed enough for this kind of 'permanency' and know that things change once you get married. Good luck and god bless, you can do it with the love and confidence in your relationship.  

Answer 9

I would say to wait.  When you go to college, you may change and want different things from a prospective mate.  The success rate is better if you wait until you graduate from college.  Here are some questions you both should answer.  Please also go for premarital counseling.  All the best.

Answer 10

I am 21, and although we did wait, I would have gotten married in a second when I was 18. You know your situation best and if you think you are ready then go for it. You can't learn without living, and sometimes that means making some mistakes. You are going to wonder forever if it would have worked out or not, so just try it, Honestly, worse case scenario, you get a divorce at a young age, it's not like it's a life and death decision!!!  

Answer 11

don't do it.. seriously  go to premartial counseling and see what will happen there if you get married a month after  your 18 then your life will be a living h**l, sorry to say it but it will.

Answer 12

You may not understand the complexity of being a military wife. You may be alone alot. You may have to travel with your husband or live alone to stay at the same school you choose to attend. He will be deployed. He will earn a military ranked salary. If you can handle that stress along with going to college then you WILL benefit from his military benefits. You can live in base housing (not luxury, but low cost), shop at the Commissary and be covered by decent health insurance. It's a toss up.

If you love him, you can wait until he puts his four years in with the Corp and is out of the Marines (unless he intends to stay in, after which you would be done school anyways) and you are out of school and then consider settling down. By then you will both have grown a lot and be a bit more stable in your careers and life directions.

My parents got married when my mom was 17 and my dad was into the Air Force. My mom had to give up school and get a job to help support them as they moved all over the country. My dad served in the Vietnam War, Operation Desert Storm and other deployments in peace time. My mom spent the majority of her time alone, working and far from her family. She and my dad never quite bonded like she wanted and being away at war changed my father. In those days they didn't ghave terms like Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder or psychologists who specialized in those types of issues so there wasn't much to be said for the man who returned from Vietnam cold, withdrawn and emotionless. They were married for 29 emotionless years before she was financially stable enough to keep the house and support herself and then they split up. My dad still sees counselors and therapists for repressed issues that stemmed from his days in combat and I am glad he is finally getting help. Make sure you think these things through before you make the decision to marry.

Good luck either way!!!

Answer 13

I got married when I was 20, and people said I was to young then too, but I disregarded what they said. I am happy with my hubby, and we had a really great time at our wedding.

If you think you are ready to get married, then do so, it is your choice.

People say that you are to young to be getting married, because a lot of girls that get married that young tend to get divorces later on down the road.

I had a friend who got married 2 months after turning 18 (and graduating) and then 6 months later she was divorced. Then again, I had another friend who was all but married to her boyfriend before she turned 17 (she was living with him and already had a kid) and she also got married as soon as she turned 18. She is still with him, they have another baby, and they are the most happy couple I've seen in a long time. (and no, it is not just a show, I stayed with them for 2 years and I only saw/hear them fight once)

So I guess it is really up to you and your boyfriend, just make sure that you really love him, and that you are ready to spend the rest of your life with him.

I wish you good luck with your decision. :)

Answer 14

my mum and dad were married when mum was 17 and dad was 18 years of age. they were very happy and would still be married if mum hadn't passed away.  they started their family quite young, mum was 19 when she had her first child, but both said it was hard.  mum always encouraged people to wait at least three years before starting a family, that gives you time to get to know each other, to get into routines and habits in your home, to put away a bit of money.  to have time to love each other, enjoy each other, enjoy married life before the little ones come along and turn it all upside down.  

so get married if you are very sure, just wait til you are finished college before you start your family. good luck to you.

Answer 15

do all of that and don't get pregnant. babies change everything & can put a hold on college. plus when you are 23 and figure out that your high school sweetheart wasn't the one for you as an adult, you won't have a complicated divorce. you are too young, but that won't stop you. have fun playing house :)