I'm 17 and in mo. its legal to move out now w/o parents concent. How do I go about telling them I'm leaving?

Question

MY parents have always been really strict on me. They have talked to me about moving out at a young age before and basically told me that if I move out before college than they arent paying for my college at all. Well I have a great job and make about 1500 a month. (Which is great for a 17 year old girl in missouri) Me and my fiance of 2 years already have an apartment. (my parents don't know) We've had it for about 2 months now and are doing great financially. We can afford it plus have money saving up for my college, a ring, and a car for me. (if I move out my parents won't let me keep my car they bought me) They don't want me to move out for one big huge reason...embarassment. They don't want to have to go to work and tell their work friends that their 17 year old daughter moved out because she didn't like her parents. Well, I love them, but I think I would get along with them much better if I was moved out and away from them. They don't see my point at all and are totally against it, but at this point I don't care. I turned 17 2 days ago and I don't want to break the news 2 days into me being legal. but at the same time, I want to get the heck out of here and get over with it already. Whats the best/most respectfull way of going about it with my parents???

Answer 1

$1500 a month is horrible pay, realize that if you move out you will have to start paying for a lot more expenses such as food etc. If you start college you wont be able to work your job anymore at all, and your parents offering to pay for it is a really good deal for living at home with them for one more year, even if you do find it hard to put up with them. It doesn't sound like they are as strict as you make them sound, because you have your own apartment at 17 years old without them knowing? You got engaged 2 years ago and you just turned 17? So you got engaged on your 15th birthday?

Your parents don't want you throwing your life away, I don't think it has anything to do with them being embarrassed.

Answer 2

if your mind is made up, then you should tell your parents CALMLY, what your plans are. Tell them you love them, but your decision is final.I'll make you a bet; That 7 years from now, you, and your boyfriend wont be together ! Those who do not study history, are doomed to repeat it !

Answer 3

Well if you can wait until your 18 and then move out..then there is nothing they can do about it. i know it a year away .. just look at this way if they pay for most of your college it will be well worth it..

if you cant wait check on the laws of your state in many a 17 yr old female can move out.. My sis did when she was(Illinois) and the police sad here there is nothing she could of done about it

Just sit them down and tell them the truth.. expect a lot of yelling and screaming.. put it all on the table..

hopefully you can work something out..

good luck

Answer 4

I think your very lucky to have what you've got. I'm 19 and still cant afford to move out though I know its what i desperately need. I think wait for at least a month, maybe say how well your managing with money etc on your own. then say how much you love them but that you think for the relationship to develop as your becoming an adult you think you need your own space.

Answer 5

I can understand your desire to move away from 'the nest".

Still, $1500 isn't that much money if something happens and you have to pay rent, insurances, utilities, food, car expenses.  I don't want to sound pessimistic, but few relationships made at your stage and age last for a long time.  Will you be able to afford the apartment and everything on your own?  What about car insurance - very expensive for a 17yo female, especially if under 25 y o male in household.

Additionally, I don't think your parents' reason for not wanting you to move out has anything to do with embarrassment.  I believe they are truly caring about you and your future.  I think they know the things I do about young relationships.

Honestly, I would reconsider.

I can't help but feel that your basic desire to move out has to do with wanting to "play house" with the BF.

Let me tell you something that it took me far too long to learn:

ONE HAS TO LEARN TO MAKE IT ALONE BEFORE ONE CAN SUCCESSFULLY MAKE IT WITH ANOTHER PERSON.

Answer 6

Say, "Mom, Dad, I love you guys so much and you've done so much for me.  I know it's early, but I think I want to try to live on my own.  I won't learn anything if you guys keep sheltering me.  I'm not looking for your approval, I'm looking for your blessing and support.  How do you feel about the situation?"

Answer 7

The easiest way to deal with it...Move your stuff out first where they will not notice too much, Ask them if you can have a family  meeting, or dinner or whatever. "Dad, mom, please listen to me, start by telling them how much you love them, that you are not doing this out of rebellion, you understand that they may be embarrassed, telll them you want to have a good relationship with them. If they put up too big of a fuss, say under law I do not have to let you know anything I can move out whenever I please BUT because I really love you guys I am telling you and trying to make it easier on both of us, I will not be too far away and my phone is open for you to call anytime if you miss me. However you can not try to control my life anymore. Put yourself in charge of the situation, be respectful and loveing and let them know your decision is already made, good luck hunny

Answer 8

Have you finished high school? If you haven't, you should do so before you move out. Moving out can complicate your life that you might not find the time to finish it.

Also, if your parents are going to pay for college, why not just go to a college where you can live in the dorm? Then you are out of their house, but still on good terms with them. They won't be embarrased by you, and you will be able to finish your education without the stress of having to pay for room and board, transportation, and school.

Answer 9

Say "I hate this S**t, I'm leaving!!" lol. But really, I would just tell my parents that I was tired of them being so strict, and it would take a load off my shoulders if I just went out. Say "It's not you, it's me". lol.