I'm 17 but my mom still sets curfews?

Question

10.00 during the school week and 11.30 at weekends. If I break them, she grounds me. I think that's too strict.

Answer 1

I don't think it's strict at all.  Coming home at a reasonable hour is about having respect for the people you live with, weather you are an adult or not.  Lets say your parents were out, and you wanted to go to bed, wouldn't you like to know when they are going to be home?  Also, my father always told us "Nothing good happens after 12:00".  We always had to be in by midnight.  And he was right.  Whenever there was any kind of trouble with our friends, it was always after 12!

Answer 2

I know how you feel cause when i was 17 I had to come in way early then you but when i turned 18 and became responsible and mature she let me stay out longer then my curfew

Answer 3

You need a curfew at 17.  Are you a wild child?  I think it should be 12:30  or 1:00 on the weekends.  Sit your mom down and say look, I'm going to be 18 soon and need a little bit more freedom so I don't overdue it when I'm on my own.  Can we bump up the curfew?

Answer 4

WOW

that is a lil harsh i think !!!!!

i have never had a curfew in my life!!!! if u come home late and my mum thinks that its not right she will tell me and then i will come home earlier.....

i make my own times when i come home!!!!!!

on school days i come home by 10:00 if i come later then i dont get enough sleep then my day is messed up !!!

on weekends i come home when ever i want!! but i jus come home at 2 am and the latest 2:30 ....i know my limits !!!!!

ur mom is way to strict i think !!!!

Answer 5

Well, she could just not care about whether you actually showed up at the house.  And not worry if you disappeared one night.  

The rule is Under their roofs, their rules apply.  When I was in my 20's I had a curfew because I lived at home.  No calling in and saying I would be staying over either.  I had to be at home.  Did I like it?  No but I came home.  Most of the time.  It wasn't fun when I didn't. Things got and stayed tense for a couple weeks.  I wasn't exactly grounded but I sure got the evil eye.

Your mom is doing you a favor.   She may be saving your life.  We are not the best judge of character when we are 17.  or even 24.

Answer 6

I had curfews until I was 18, and your mom is doing you a favor.  Seems rediculous now I know.    

Answer 7

Seems a bit strict to me, at 17 I was working and had my own car so I guess my parents felt it would be a bit harsh to expect a 'young working adult' to be in at a certain time.

That said, I was usually in around midnight during the week.

Maybe you should just try explaining to her that you are old enough to have s*x, have a baby, get married, drive a car, you should be old enough (& sensible enough) to decide what time you come home on an evening.

Answer 8

Good for her! Sorry, but that's how I feel. My parent's had me on curferws when I was that age too. I didn't lose it until I went to college, but when I moved back home for a time period, the curfews went back into effect. I did find a way around them, if I knew I was going to be later than the time alloted, I always called them at least 30-45 minutes ahead of the time and explained where I was and who was with me, as long as I did this, they would extend the time out. If I forgot to call, then I was busted. Make sure your mom knows who you are with and knows the kids and has phone numbers for everybody. We didn't have cell phones when I was growing up (they were just starting to come out and you needed a breifcase to carry it-ya, I'm old) but my parents knew all my friends and had their parent's phone numbers so they could call and check on me anytime. I found just being honest with them worked and they rarely checked up on me. Try doing some of what I did and maybe your time will be extended. Just don't do it all the time (like every weekend, but maybe once a month) and before you now it, it will be extended permantly.

Good luck to you.

Answer 9

you think that's strict. strict is when your an engilsh student like i am burn you frigging books and happy you leave school at sixteen like we all do in the uk. go to live in the usa as a reward freedom and achievement till you find out the school age is 18 there and my mom says your not going back to school until some officer in the city tells me i am a skiver and will be prosecuted if i don't get to go back to a school , so then i now have a school there. and back at school feeling weird like i am 2 again trying to make friends till i leave in  six months.   as i am 18 now. i really need to go to collage now or uni not stupid school i guess it is American through lol  stupid easy work do they all think i am retarded or something !! lucky for 18 yr old and 17 yr old Americans coming to live in the uk that's all i can say !!

Answer 10

sounds reasonable to me. of course you want to stay out later, but its about trust.  she's only looking out for you.  in less than a year you'll be 18 and will be able to do what you like.  

Answer 11

No it's not too strict.  You are living under her roof aren't you? You are still a minor aren't you?   You have your whole life to stay out as late as you want after you move out.

Answer 12

It's interesting because I came across a dilemma similar to yours a few weeks ago from a young lady across the Atlantic (at this point I'm making the assumption that you are from the UK?)

Perhaps it might help to post it here. Take a special note of the reply from bud 2192 (8th answer from the top), and you'll get a very sincere view of the parent's perspective...

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 13

I had a 10pm cerfew after graduation and after giving birth while I lived with my mom.. her reasons were that she had to get up and go to work and couldn't stay up all night worrying about where I was. Being a mom now and working full time.. I understand but then I thought she was just evil and didn't want me to have any fun and even told her anything I can do after 9 or 10 I can do before ... hense the pregnancy. I didn't win that argument.

Answer 14

im 14 and i dont have a curfew but im not allowed uptown after dark but i could stay in a friends house until whatever time i wanted but as long as i dont walk. its only for your safety and i no it sounds strict but its all our moms jobs to look out for us.

Answer 15

if u dont like the rules move into ur own place and pay rent, bills ect then u can do what u like simple, parents set curfews for a reason not to be spiteful.

Answer 16

I think its pretty fair at that age my curfew was at 9 on weekdays and 9 r 10ish on weekends and i could not have a date with any boys! just obey the time she has set and maybe once she sees your doing that she may lighten up, i know it kinda sucks but shes just trying to be a good parent and make sure her kids are okay hang in there!  

Answer 17

She has every right to do it, whether you agree or not, until you are 18 at which time you are a legal adult. It might suck, but she is doing what she thinks is best. In 10 years you won't even remember, or care what your curfew was at age 17 anyways.

Answer 18

Well 10 on a school night isnt that bad since school should be your first priority. And what is there to do past 11:30 on the weekend?

Answer 19

my parents were still like that when i was 17, yet my brother gets a much better deal at 14 than i did at 17!

i think it will probably get better when you're 18 and are an "adult", can go out drinking etc.

my parents also relaxed alot more when i passed my driving test.

and it will improve even more when you move out!

Answer 20

sounds like a normal 17 year old cerfew.

at least you can tell your mom cares about you though.

if your breaking the cerfew they aren't going to get bumped up either.

also some cities have city-wide cerfews set for teenagers anyway.

Answer 21

She is probably just worried about you. Talk to her about it, my friend had a curfew and she used to lie and tell her mum that she was staying at my house which put me in an awkward situation. As long as you are honest with her and maybe compromise she should come round.

Answer 22

Your mother is setting curfews which I believe are reasonable.The world has changed a lot and she wants to try her best to keep you safe.If you show maturity in respecting the household rules ,if a special occasion comes up you may be entrusted with a slightly longer curfew or more priveleges,If you cannot respect your mom and the house rules without giving your mom grief she will think you are not mature enough to handle more responsibility.There may not be danger lurking behind every street corner and so parents are left to try to at least keep you as safe as they can.Trust me, your mom loves you.Parents aren't in your life to be popular and your buddy.Give your mom ahug,tell her you love  her and thank her for caring enough to do the right hing.Take care.

Answer 23

I agree especially for a 17 year old, you should talk to her & say if you do all your school work before you go out then 11pm on a school night and say 12.00/30 at the weekend (unless you are somewhere special etc)

Im 16 and i dont have a curfew but obviously i am in at a decent time just explain that you will tell her where you are going etc and wont stay out for all hours (3am etc)

(: hope i helped

Answer 24

Why is it too strict?  Are you 18 and totally responsible for your own actions?  I always had a curfew until I turned 18 AND graduated from high school.  My mom was responsible for me and I lived in her home, so it was not only her right to have rules, it was her responsibility.

Answer 25

Sorry, but you're only 17.  It sounds completely reasonable.  Maybe 11:30 on weekends is a little early, but I'm sure if you told her what you were doing and why you wanted to stay out later, she would compromise.  Stop complaining about the rules, and prove to her that she can let up a little bit.  Act like an adult, take emotion of it and don't give her reason to suspect you are doing things you shouldn't be.

There is nothing for a 17 year old to be doing after 11:30 at night anyway.  And 10 during the week is completely reasonable.  You have to wake up in the morning for school.

Answer 26

im 13 and ive gotta be in before 11pm on school nights then on weekends or holidays to be honest they dont reely care, their too busy with their new families but my brothers try and get me to get back earlier

she's doing u a favour, the amount of gang crime there is out there, be thankfull she cares about you!

Answer 27

That is perfectly acceptable.  Be grateful that you have a mom who cares about you and your well-being.  In a few years you won't even care about what your curfew was when you are 17.

Their house, their rules.  They probably want you home early for a couple of reasons:

1.  You'll be well rested for school the next day

2.  You'll be in before all the real trouble starts (and it can start early in some places)

3.  They won't be woken up at 2/3 in the morning by you coming in...and trust me, parents sleep light until their children come home.  So it's a respect issue too.

4.  They are your parents and have every right to set your curfew based on what they think is the best time.

Your mom probably pushed your curfew to the latest possibile for her sanity.  Be grateful that you have a mom that actually cares about your well-being.

Answer 28

Heya

Unfortunatly , whilst your under their roof you abide by their rules. when your 18 you can do what you want. your cerfews alot better than some i know. i dont personally have one because i havnt lived with my parents for about a year now. but my friend who is also 17 has to be in by 11 even if its a party.

=] x*x

Answer 29

i'm EIGHTEEN.

and my week day curfew is 9:00 unless i'm at work

and my weekend is 10:30.

parents suck.

Answer 30

It may seem unfair to you but your mum is doing this because she is keeping you safe, also you have to respect others in the house so if you were allowed to come in whenever it suited you that means your mums on tenter hooks waiting for you and can't lock up and go to bed because she's constantly waiting for you to arrive hme safely. So I'm afraid her house so her house rules you will have to wait until you have your own place to set your rules !

Answer 31

Your mom is a good mom.  I had the same curfew until I graduated from high school.  You are fortunate that your mom cares enough to set boundaries.  It shows that she loves you and cares about what happens to you.  Trust me, you will understand better when you are older and have children of your own.