I'm 23, married and wanting a baby, I need your input-pros and cons, should I wait?

Question

Please share your own experiences (pros and cons) of having children in your early 20s and/or later 20s and 30s. I want to make sure I am making the right decision. Thanks so much!

Answer 1

the most important point to consider is do you AND your husband want to start a family now.  What he honestly thinks is very important.  Also, how is yor marital relationship?  It should be pretty stable before you have a child, because life as you and he know it will completely change - in a wonderful way (most of the time) - when you have a baby.

I was married at 20, and my wife wanted children, but deep down I really didn't yet.

Next consider your body.  It will change when you have a baby.  In general, the younger you are the less others will even know you had a child - depending on your genes and eating habits.

Answer 2

I am 22 haiving my first 4 months before I turned 23 I planned this baby and I am very happy I have been married for 5 years and just feel it's right I am financially stable have an AS degree so why not? If you can afford it and you both want a baby I say go for it! When your young like we are you have the stamina and humor that older couples don't always have and when your 45 or 50 you'll be able to have a whole secongd run with your hubby because you'll still be young travel the world etc.. and your kids will be off to college do it while your young!

Answer 3

Being a very serious mother of six, I would advice to have children only if you know that you and your husband are willing to LOVE and CARE for your children irregardless of when you have them. A young mother has age, youth and health on her side to deal with the rigours of motherhood. An older mother may suffer more aches and physical pains but the motivational commitment involved during chidbearing and child care has many pluses. You'll look and feel younger, will always be young at heart and the children will keep your mind very alert and active. Motherhood is very serious business.A rich and career stable lady may not necessarily be the better mum. The best thing any of us parents can give their children is not money or luxuries but a happy and wonderful childhood. So, are you ready for that?  

Answer 4

i am 23 years old when i got married and had my daughter and i am very happy to have her..its the most precious thing in the whole world..

my parents both have arthritis in their 30's and they said its genetics thats why i always telling myself ever since that i will get marry young (not so much young) so that i can have 2 or 3 kids because if i wait 30 i might have only one child and its not good because that child will become selfish and stubborn and always wanting to get what it wants and lonely and dont know how to care and love someone else =(..

go for it girl as long as your married and your husband wants it too and financially okay..dont wait 30 years old above because its prone of baby having birth defects (if its first time to have a child)

Answer 5

As a 23 year old, have you nothing better do do, nothing else you aspire to accomplish in life other than reside your life into motherhood?

If you're financially secure, why don't you see the world or something?

You can have a baby anytime.  You'll be physically able for the next 15 years at least...

What's the rush?

Answer 6

Hi im 21 and im getting married and we already have a 6 month old.. its the best thing that ever happend to me , and im young enough to play with him but yet old enough to be responsible for him. If you have career paths that you want to go down, id wait until you achieved that but if family is your number one priority, and you believe careers can wait, as long as tehres a roof over the babies head and enough to provide things he needs, and 2 parents that are BOTH ready to love and care for another human being (they are alot of responsibility) then go ahaed.. no need to wait! <3  

Answer 7

I was 34 and left it late I feel. 23 is a good age to have children, married and husband in steady job, perfect combination, go for it!. You will be energetic and young enough to be quite cool for your children.

Answer 8

Financially if you feel ready..do it. 23 is a perfect age for conception. I would say do it. All my friends had all their kids before age 25

Answer 9

If your ready, go for it! But it really is hard work! I have a 7 month old and they are very demamding, but it is also very rewarding to! I'm 28, glad I waited, because I had more partying to do! No worries, you have time either way....good luck!

Answer 10

That's a decision only you and your husband can make.  Though, since you do want kids, you will probably end up having them sooner rather than later.  I was very clucky for the last several months before I got pregnant (accidentally).  

I'm 24, and I wanted to see the world a bit more before having kids, but oh well.  I just figure I'll send them off to see the world and live vicariously.  :)

Answer 11

It depends on your lifestyle. Do you and your hubby enjoy eating out a lot, traveling freely, are you on the go alot? If so, an infant puts a serious damper on that.

Do you have family around to support you? If so, you'll have built-in babysitters who can give you some time to yourselves.

Don't forget to consider if you're going to stay home with your child or go back to work - many women who have to keep working usually find it extremely difficult to put their child in daycare.

Also keep in mind that having children changes your relationship, sometimes for the worse and sometimes for the better. Make sure your relationship is incredibly strong and can withstand the tough times.

I'm the happy mother of a 2-month old son, and while I adore my boy I also miss being able to go out for happy hour after work with my friends. And let's not even get started on the travel thing - I've been taking two overseas trips per year up until now... now I'm looking up Disney cruises and other places to go that are fun for children.

Answer 12

Assuming you are married, you should be talking to your hubby about this.  If you are not, you need to give it a lot more thought.  Having kids while you are young is tough, but you will still be young when they are on their own.  If you wait until you are 40, you will be so much better prepared, but you will be dealing with teenagers going through puberty while you are going through menopause.  Good luck!

Answer 13

I had my first baby when I was 23, and now im almost 25 and having my second! I love every moment of my son, and I can't wait to have my daughter. I don't think 23 is to early, Im happy with having my babies now, because then the husband and I can have our freedom earlier in life, and I like the fact that they'll be 1 and 1/2 yrs. apart. I think if your ready to have a baby, then you should do it, no one can tell you differently! I hope you get what you want, Im happy for you both!

Oh and if you wait to long, in your 30's you have a greater chance of having a down syndrome baby, or a baby with special needs!

Answer 14

I was married at 19, prego at 20, and a momma at 21. I am glad I had my son at a younger age. I think raising a child is a challenge at any age but as far as risk factors, being in your early twenties puts you in the lower end of the percentiles. I am 26 and prego with our second. I earned my degree in nursing while my first son was an infant and graduted when he was three. I say, if your in a healthy marriage, have steady income, and are both ready...go for it. There is no "right time" to have a baby because life happens. If you wait for the right time, it may never come. (there are exceptions to that rule though like teenagers and etc....) But, it sounds like nothing is holding you back. Go for it!!!