I'm 4 weeks pregnant and my partner doesn't want to continue our relationship?

Question

I've been dating this guy for 6 months, i recently got pregnant. I'm 21 and he's 22 and the day i found out i was pregnant we both went through a variety of emotions. We were ONLY dating, so i decided to ask him if he sees our if relationship going anywhere (because i'm having his child) and he said that he wanted to end it.

I don't want to be selfish but i did want our relationship to work out even more now that I'm having his child. He simply says he does not want a relationship right now, but in my argument, this child was unexpected and i did not exactly plan on having a child at this age. I know i should try to suck it up but i'm not sure what to do. He says he doesn't want to be in a relationship with me because of this pregnancy and the child, but at the same time i feel like he's not giving it a chance and is fixated on not being in a relationship.

Answer 1

men can easily walk away I dont know why or how but they do.  Im lucky and have a partner that usually does the mother figure better than i do it.  You will have to really think about what YOU want and how YOU feel! Pegnancy is an emotional rollercoaster and when the baby arrives it doesnt get any easier.  I personally could not do it alone but many women do! just weigh up your options you are only 4 weeks but decide quick the further you are the harder to let it go :-) good luck everything always works itself out :-)

Answer 2

If u want the baby then have it and he might come around but time will tell. If u don t want a baby then u could put it up 2 be in a foster home.

Answer 3

you've gotten a lot of responses on here. Some I agree with, some I'm a little leary about. But, since you asked...here's my opinion.

Your first priority is you and your child. I was a single mother of two toddlers. So, I'm not going to preach about how to be strong, and it's easier than you think. It's not. But it sure is a character builder! I was married when I had my two boys. MARRIED, not dating. Children are not a reason to stay together. I have known my ex-husband for over 13 years now. 6 months, 13 years, it doesn't matter...sometimes, it's just not meant to be. However, my boys are my reason for living. I wouldn't trade all the heartache, financial issues, and tears for anything. It has made me a stronger person. Now, I have an amazing boyfriend going on 2 years that is the BEST dad in the world to these boys. (their 'real' dad/sperm donor could care less about seeing or taking care of them) SO, even if you end up being a single parent, don't worry for a minute that your child will not have a father....there are WONDERFUL men out there that will love you AND your child unconditionally....to the point that no one would even be able to tell that he/she wasn't his....mine get mistaken for my bf's all the time, and he loves it! Good luck girl! Keep your chin up and take care of yourself!

Answer 4

whether he likes it or not, you two ARE in a relationship for life if you have this child, even if you never talk to each other again.

how amicable that relationship is depends on your respective maturity levels.

and may i also suggest you use one of the number of fine methods of birth control available for women out there?  trust me, you NEVER want to rely on the guy to do the responsible thing.

i've been with my bf for not even three years and we're expecting our second child already (i'm one of a freakish few who can only use condoms and i told thim that from the start but he wanted to whine about "showering with a raincoat on" and i didn't mind if i had more kids so... here we are).

Answer 5

Well it's pretty normal for a guy to freak out when his brand new girlfriend springs pregnancy upon him.

The sad thing is that the guy can walk away. You need to make choices for you because you can't count on him being there. Don't bank on getting him back or having his support. Sorry but it's the sad reality.

Answer 6

leave him. mine told me the same thing, and we stayed together anyways, now i am leaving my daughter is 18 months, life would have been so much easier if i had figured it out sooner.

Answer 7

At the risk of sounding judgmental, if you were having s*x, you were doing more than "only dating".  In 6 months time, there has probably not been enough sharing of other things to truly establish a lasting relationship.  If his reaction is any indication, it would seem to be this way.

If all that is true, you need to understand that if he decides that he wants to have a relationship with you and/or the baby, you are all starting over at square 1.

You need to make plans for a future without him.  You can always change those plans later, if need be.  But, right now, you are planning (and eating) for two.  You need to be more concerned right now with proper care for yourself and your child.

I am assuming that a doctor has confirmed the pregnancy.

Answer 8

Maybe its better to be away from each other for a  couple of weeks

Easier said then done

But it will give you both time to get used to the idea and decide what you want to do about your relatinship or not if the case and the baby

Its probley a lot  too take in at the moment for you both i expect

Llet you both clear you head and ask him to meet you in a netural space in aweek or so so you can have a decent talk which you will need to do for the babys sake

Does he want to see the baby ?

Answer 9

Just do your own thing for a while. Concentrate to eating right and taking care of yourself so you will birth a healthy baby.  He may change his mind once things sink in.  If not, you have to take care of that baby and not worry about him.  Some guys just dont step up to the plate, and that is the danger of having s*x with someone that you are not married to.  bc pregnancy is always a possibility, but their commitment is not always there for the long run.  Good Luck honey.

Answer 10

im sorry to hear that. hes just stubborn i guess.

if he doesnt want to be in a relationship thats fine. just tell him you will move on. i know its going to be really hard raising this baby by yourself (without the babys dad). but both of you brought this child in the world, now both of you should take care of. thats what i think. but if he doesnt want a part, then go on and take care of yourself and the child.

DO NOT ABBORT, that is killing the baby. sum people dont know that the baby already has arms and legs and formed when they get an abbortion. how horrible.

just talk to him and ask him if wants anything to do with the him and the baby (not a relationship) but like wants to see the baby or wants to take care of it or something. you really need to figure that out.

good luck

Answer 11

A big question is, would the relationship have continued to go on if you didn't get pregnant. Having a child should not be the sole reason for staying in a relationship. If he did not see your relationship getting serious, he has the right to leave, but he should take responsibility and support you, even if he chooses to end the romantic part of your relationship. Good luck. Pray a lot and get some counselling to help you get through this.

Answer 12

First off, Congrats to you. I feel your pain and I sympathize with you. One of the answerer's was correct, the guy can just walk away. The only thing you need to focus on right now is you and your unborn baby. He has made his decision, and you never know, maybe he will change his mind later on. Just don't spend all of your time stressing out about it. Deal with it now and get it out of your system, then jump right into taking care of YOU so that YOU can take care of baby. That is the most IMPORTANT job you have right now.... GOD Bless and I will be rooting for you!!

Answer 13

he does not care for you or the child.drop him.now:what will you do about this unwanted child?