I'm a minor and my girlfriend is a minor her mom got a no contact order against me what can i do?

Question

I went over to my girlfriends house and she took a picture in her camera of me and her. Her mom snooped around in her phone and found the picture. So the next day her mom went to the cop station and got a no contact order against me. Later that day my girlfriend called me and told me her mom hit her on the side of the head so i called to cops and they went to check on her and didn't do anything because there was no bruise on the side of her head. I went to meet with the cops and they said they cant tell me anything bout it and we would have to wait for 19 months before she turns 18 to take it off what can i do someone please help me all i do is just sit around and cry all day and sleep and just waiting for her to call me i love her so much please someone help??????????

Answer 1

What that's crazy how can she get that order against you i don't understand how that is legal? If you were like 25 then ok your doing something wrong but the same age . I cant really advise cause i don't know the legal system in usa I'm assuming that's where you are from in australia different story ....Just sneakily meet up and if you get caught say you just ran into each other... you cant help that.

Answer 2

You are making things worse by calling the cops and such. Was this picture provocative or what? Just finding a picture is not enough reason for all of this unless they know you to have a bad reputation. Keep in mind that as parents we want the best for our children. The last thing these people want is for their daughter to become a part of the teen pregnancy or worse statistics. You need to be mature and find a way to show a more positive side of yourself. Be the kind of person you would want for your child. If the love is real it will stand the test of time. There is not a positive over night cure. Find a way to make your negatives positive so they can feel secure about you being with their child. No matter how much you love her, they love her more.

Answer 3

First of all you seem to be a really responsible and caring boyfriend; so good for you. As for your situation, i wish i knew what to say to make it better because you must really be hurting and i'm sorry you feel this way. My boyfriend and I went through something very similar when we were your age, so i know how angry and frustrated you must be. What you need to remember is that if you are really determined and really love each other you can get through this. I would speak to your parents or older sibling or a teacher; someone who knows her and her family and you, because it seems like her mother is one of those overprotective unreasonable creeps. You need to talk to someone that knows a bit about everyone involved and who is a figure of authority. They might be able to calm down her mom or give you advice.

updated later: also, maybe you could send her mom a letter explaining how insensitive etc it was to let her see the photo and tell her how much you respect her and her daughter and reassure her your not only in it for the s*x. I think she would appreciate your bravery, honesty and commitment. it would be more effective if you went over and told her this face to face, and also tell her that by saying these things you are not asking for anything, but merely apologising to her and telling her how much you respect her daughter.

She just wants what is best for her daughter, and even if she is a little extreme about it; you can probably appreciate her reasoning. It may take some time to earn her respect but keep up with random acts of kindness, and do bold things to earn back her respect.

Answer 4

Wow -- all this over a PICTURE?  Good heavens, were you naked or something in the picture?!

Unfortuately, there's not much that you CAN do -- she has a legally enforceable restraining order against you.  She may be wacky, but unless she is actively harming your girlfriend, then she can deal with her child as she sees fit.

Sorry . . . maybe she'll cool down and be a little more reasonable.  

EDIT:  Well, if you guys were naked, then it's going to take a LONG time for her mom to cool down!  She's 16 now -- her mother is obviously unwilling to become a grandmother at this early age, and is taking steps to prevent it :-)  

For one thing, STOP CRYING.  It doesn't do any good, and just makes your eyes red and your nose run.  If you're reacting like this, I can sorta understand why her mother is afraid of you - she's heard too many stories of psycho boyfriends who think they're acting out a scene from Romeo & Juliet.

Calm down, and if you want, write a letter to her mother, in your best handwriting.  Do NOT send an email, ok?  Don't make excuses, don't beg to see her daughter -- just apologize for your behavior, acknowledge it was wrong,  apologize for abusing her trust in both you and her daughter, and end with saying that you understand that she is only protecting her daughter, and you respect that.  Don't say anything MORE than that, because I suspect you'll just get yourself in more trouble -- the more you say, the deeper you'll dig your grave!  Keep it simple, keep it honest, and KEEP IT SHORT.  

That's the best you can do right now.  (Do you go to the same school?)