I'm afraid my 4 year old is going to end up hurting one of my 4 month old twins. What else can I do?

Question

Ok. I have a 4 year old boy, a 17 month old girl, and 4 month old twin girls. My son is usually pretty good with the twins but he has gotten to where I am afraid he is going to hurt them. For instance, I had one laying in the floor on a blanket and he started piling the couch pillows on top of her. Just a little while ago he was watching a video before bedtime and I'd had one laying on a folded up comforter in the floor and went to the bathroom (remember, he usually doesn't do this stuff so I hadn't really worried about it), when I come out he had rolled her up, litterally like a buritto or something in the comforter. I have caught him trying to wrestle around with them like he does to a point with the older girl (trying to sit on them or something like that). Has anyone else had this problem? Usually he is a very well behaved and loving little boy. He'll lay in the floor on the blankets with them and play for hours, this is just a once in a blue moon thing. But I've tried explaining to him that that can hurt the babies really bad and make them really sick, I've tried punishing him, I just don't know what else to do. I don't want to have to leave the babies in their cribs 24/7. Any suggestions?! And please no hateful answers.

Answer 1

You just can't leave him alone with them or turn your back on him while they are around for even one second anymore at all.

Continue to punish him when he does something wrong, and also keep reinforcing the fact that he can seriously hurt them if he continues to do this. You can't stop doing that. It may seem harsh but if something happened to them you would feel guilty.

Sometimes younger children just have a hard time grasping the concept that babies are fragile and can't do all of the things they think are fun and while they are just trying to play with the baby it could seriously injure them. You may even have to talk to him or send him to counseling, he could be feeling like he is not getting any attention since obviously twins require a lot of attention and the other younger sibling and be trying to obtain your attention through the object that you are giving so much attention to. Try doing something with him everyday to let him know you still care.

Answer 2

pre-school

don't leave the babies with him alone

Answer 3

The first thing that comes to mind is:

try to involve him a bit in caring for the babies.

He may have a bit of jealousy here, but if you explain things about baby care and let him to small tasks, you have 2 birds with 1 stone.

- He gets more direct attention from you

- He will learn about how fragile small children really are

But, first thing - as the other person said - never leave them alone for now.

Answer 4

remember your son is just a baby too. try taking his hand and demonstrating how to softly touch the babies, showing him how to gently touch their heads. Instruct him that he is not allowed to touch the babies when you are not in the room and be ready to intervene if he forgets. Try not to punish him but the gently remind him what to do because punishment will cause sibling tension.

Good luck! and congratulations on your four wonderful children  

Answer 5

when he does this, show him you're angry and tell him you won't give him any 'treats' or 'play time'...he's gonna go to his room, or a certain place and stay there and realize what he did is serious . honestly, if piles pillows on top of their faces one, they could suffocate.

or take him to pre-school or daycare or something, but i think you should be firm with him and tell him NOT to touch them or play with them too rough

Answer 6

On the floor?!! What is the matter with you?!! You dont let a 4 year old babysit!! You need to be looking after those kids and spending all of your time with them. No, you dont put them in their cribs 24/7, you look after them. Teach them to walk, talk, how to behave, how to love and how to play with smaller creatures. Man!!!