I'm afraid to be 'brainwashed' in rehab.. should I still go?

Question

I'm supposed to go for inpatient treatment for depression and eating disorders and a suicide attempt. I know I need help on the one hand, but I don't want to go there and be brain washed by counselors and 'lose myself' in the process. I'm an atheist and don't want to change that. I also have a lot of anger in myself and I get angry at 'overly happy' people that just rub their exaggerated happiness in your face. I'm afraid I might have trouble to adjust in rehab.

A friend of mine had similar problems and just returned from a 3 month inpatient treatment. She changed almost ALL her beliefs and views, which may be good for her, but I am a little scared at that to be honest. She hated the 12 step program and is now its biggest defender out there. I find that too drastic of a change. It's good for her to have found the help she needs, but you shouldn't go from extreme to extreme. Also, I don't want to come out of rehab judging people or my friends. I always feel people are a tad bit precocious after rehab.

Any input/experiences? I know i need help so please don't tell me I'm in denial, I just don't want to have my whole personality changed by what other people believe. Last time I was influenced by other people I ended up becoming a binge drinker and I stopped that behavior by myself, so I do know what's good for me.

thanks.

Answer 1

being clean and sober does not mean you are brainwashed.  It means that your life is free of your addiction.  Some do that with 12 step while others do it with other means.  People who are actually happy have no desire to rub your face in their exuberance.  The more treatment you get and the more freedom you really get the less you will be interested in judging others. It will make you more interested in life and less focused on only yourself.  Thus, rehab in the end makes you more interesting as a person.  People who are not sober really are not all that happy or funny ya know.

Answer 2

You certainly won't be "brainwashed", but you will be asked to examine your behaviour, and beliefs, and helped to find out why you adopted these self destructive tendencies, It doesn't matter if you are an atheist.

Many people who have been through it are proud of the transformation they have made in themselves, and would like others to receive a similar benefit, which doesn't necessarily make them "precious". Some, on the other hand, are totally up themselves, and somewhat of a pain.

Just don't close your mind, and go in with the attitude that you refuse to be helped with your problems. Give it a fair go, and see what happens. View sections 2, (page R first) 56, 5, and 4 (page C first) at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris

Your fear of change is understandable, yet change is one of life's few constants, and is inevitable for all of us. Read section 28.

Answer 3

Not to be judging but God preaches free will; thus you always have a choice.

You have a choice to walk away, listen, and live your own life. No one can take this away except you..

Answer 4

Change is scary, even if it is change for the better. I don't believe you will be brainwashed. You may however get a clarity of thought that you never had before. Look where your current mindset has gotten you...a change is what you need. You can do it. It is a chance for you to start toward a life where you don't have to feel angry and hurt all the time. I wish you luck and success. You will be ok. You are brave for taking that first step.  

Answer 5

You definetly need some therapy. With all this anger and "jealousy" of happy people I wouldnt worry about getting brainwashed if I was you I would worry about how Im going to be years down the road. You should worry about how people are going to feel about you with this type of view. If you want to be successful in life go to rehab and just let what ever happens happen. Change is good and your eyes might be opened to what you thought you didnt want to be. Suicide will only show you were a coward! Face this and come out of it with a testimony and new life experience!

Answer 6

During my last deep depression I was hospitalised for 8 days with an additional week of outpatient day-treatment.  I felt much like you during the day treatment portion (ie. I thought they were trying to brainwash me).  I did not get brainwashed, but the treatment DID help me with the suicidal urges I was feeling.

Hospitals are there to help you gain your balance during a crisis, whether depression or eating disorders or drug addiction.  You say your friend came back changed - I'm not sure how she was changed, but it could just be that the treatment helped her come to grip with thoughts and feelings she always had - just hadn't been able to access or appreciate.  I say get the help you need.  And remember - if you go voluntarily to a hospital, you'll retain more rights than if you are placed there against your will.  

Good luck.

Answer 7

Of course you are going to have to change!  What you are doing now is not working for you.  I understand that you don't want to lose who you are but part of who you are is a person who is suffering badly.   Aren't you ready to let that go? You aren't going to "lose" anything that matters in rehab.   Please go.  

ps- you don't neccesarily have to believe in God to follow the 12 steps - your higher power can be whatever you want.   I personally believe if you ask God to help you that you will have the best possible chance at recovery, but it's up to you.  

Answer 8

Go... change can be good.