I'm curious to know how others would feel in this situation.?

Question

Yesterday was my birthday. 30+ something b-day. I didn't get a cake, just a card from my mother. Now like two months ago, I came home one day and she was planning a trip to Legoland for my bday. Ok I have never, EVER expressed an interest in going there. I have no idea where she got that idea. Then two days before she suggested we go to Denny's, a place I am not a fan of. I told her I don't want to go there. So the day of, I just get this card and nothing else. I was hoping for at least a cake, which is all I ever want and I didn't get that.

Background on her, she is a woman that thinks once a person is an adult they shouldn't care about their birthdays anymore. I told her flat out, not everyone is like that, and I am one of those people. This person does nothing for me on my birthday, but helps plan parties for the neighbors. The only reason my bday last year wasn't a complete loss. Is because my son who was 3 at the time, demanded his grandmother get his mommy a bday cake. It was the best because he picked it out himself.

Would anyone else feel depressed after this happened to them? Also, what would you do in this situation?

Answer 1

i know how you feel my bday was aug 13 and i didn't even get a card.i try

not to let it get to me but it really does.it got worse after i turn 30. so i know how you feel.you think the one person who would get you something would be your mother,but guess not!tell her you love to have

cake for your bday i guess that's all you can do.good luck and happy bday to you and many more

Answer 2

I just don't understand the whole birthday thing.  Who cares, 47 million people a day have a birthday.  It means nothing.

Answer 3

It really sounds like she made an effort to find something that you would want to do to celebrate your birthday. I would forgive her and move on.

Even though you were not interested in the places she chose, she was trying,. Give her credit for that.

Answer 4

Well you could have a Mom like mine who took me to Happy Joes ( a kids b-day place) on my 40th B-day

I would have rather gone with out.

It's all hit and miss hun hang in there

P.S. Happy Birthday

Answer 5

I am probably not the right person to answer this question.  I am older and there is nothing I need or want.  My daughter does get me a bday cake and a card every year and my son sends me one from the family then he chooses a card for just him to send me.  It is always a very special card.

I could do without the bday cake since my granddaughter's is two days before mine and we usually have bday cake left over from her bday.

My children would like to give me something on my bday but I tell them it would just be a waist of their money since I don't want anything.

I am sorry you didn't get your cake this year.  Some people think that Santa Clause and birthday days are just for children.  Yet these same people will dress up for Halloween and go all out (can't figure this one out because Halloween is my least favorite holiday of all).  

No cake no ice cream -  sorry!

Answer 6

Honestly I think you broke her heart cuz she wants to do for her grandson but she probably felt like your trying to stop her so I can understand why she's get upset but as your mother for her not to acknowledge your b-day sucks.  I would be upset if I were you as well but don't make a big deal.  I think she wants to be involved with you and your son but whatever she suggests you say no to.  I think she's hurt and I don't blame her, you guys need to sit down over a cup of coffee and have a good mother daughter convo, I'm sure if you open the lines of communications everything will be ok.  

Answer 7

Your mom wasn't doing nothing for you, She probably thought the trip to legoland would be something fun for you to do with your son, she tried to think of the trip to Denny's which is also a kid friendly place and you shot that down too. So she made sure to do something and gave you the card. You expect your mother to know what you want but, you seem to have trouble communicating that to her  Why don't you make a plan for your b-day next year including making your own cake with your son? In the mean time try talking to a professional about your feelings of disappointment and resentment toward your mom and they can help you learn  how to communicate with her.

Answer 8

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Darlin, sorry I'm late I really had no Idea it was yesterday, You certainly don't look any older.

  Your mother probably isn't as heartless as you think, maybe she is just cheap. was it a HallMark card . (I crack me up)

  Really it is sad when no one appreciates your birthday no matter how many you've had you still get only one a year, However you are old enough to make your own party and thats what you should do, invite a few friends that you would like ti know disappointed you yesterday, have cake, ice cream , and buy yourself something nice.

  I will watch for my invite I know just the shirt to wear.