I'm getting really tired of this...?

Question

I am 14 and sometimes have this horrible feeling my "friends" don't care about me. They never call me, I am the one who calls them. They make excuses not to hang out with me even if they were the one to make plans.

Also they act embarrassed and don't say much when I invite them to eat lunch with me at school during the school year. A lot of times people say something like "we'll email over the summer" or "you should play softball with me and my friends" and then don't follow through.

I've tried slipping my friends my phone # or something and saying "I haven't heard from you in a while, maybe you should call me sometime" and even talking to them when that didn't work.

This isn't just with one group of friends but almost every friend I've ever had. I'm not sure why because I would consider myself to be a very good friend, and people have even told me so. I don't understand what I'm doing wrong. Do you guys have any advice?

Answer 1

I don't think it's what you're doing wrong. I think it's their problem! I have the same or very similiar issues...

I think teens have so much on their minds, its kinda difficult for us to just like chill out and be bffs and leave the rest of the world behind. We forget to call/text people on time. We forget times/dates/people/ect.

I know this can get annoying and it sometimes feels like you're the only one that cares about the friendship, but usually they care too. I think that when people get older and are adults they are able to handle friendships better. I'm sorry that you have to deal with friends that don't appreciate you right now, but one day you'll find a friend or friends that will. i'm sure of it. just keep being a nice and caring person.

good luck;] xo

Answer 2

are you sure that it's not you ?

because by the things you are saying.. it seems like this is more about you than your friends

i mean if they were your friends they would keep in touch with you... and they would hang out with you...  

Answer 3

those are not the types of friends that you should have, they dont deserve your time, try making friends through school clubs or youth organizations where you are, maybe strike a balance between anti-social and clingy when meeting them (i dont know your personalitiy but those are common reasons why people may not be receptive), but dont change who you are just because you want to approve to others.

Answer 4

your not doin anything wrong my friends do that to me soemtimes to but just not as bad but like i'm always the one calling them they never call me but then i just realzed i like to talk on the fone way more then my friends do,but ya to me it sounds like they aren't really good friends hun you don't deserve to be treated like that especially if you say that you are a really good friend maybe its time for new friends because real friends would never leave another friend hangin!

Answer 5

Confront them. Go up to them and be like, "What's the deal, guys. You never attempt to hang out with me. Is it something I do? Is it something I've said? Is it the way I dress?"

There has to be a reason that no one will hang out with you. Do you dress weird? Do you cuss a lot? Do you act really loud and obnoxious in public? Has someone spread a rumor about you? Think about the way you come across to other people. You may be doing something embarrassing that they just don't want to tell you about because it would be awkward.

You could be doing everything right and it's just your friends that are being jerks to you. You'll never know until you talk about it with them.

Answer 6

You should really get out more and see that they are not real friends and that they are enemies that know all your secrets. My advice to you is TO GET NEW FRIENDS. good luck!! B-}

Answer 7

If the people you are calling your friends are treating you like this then they are not very good friends.  But I know thinking about trying to start over in making friends is scary.  High school can be full of drama and challenges.  Remember sometime people get wrapped up in their own problems.  And your friends also have to obey the limitations put on them with their family.  So they may just have schedules that do not allow them to  spend as much time with you as they would like to.  Maybe they are embarrassed, to tell you the real reason they can not do things or maybe they are just plan rude people.  Just try communicating as best you can.  If they don't respond then maybe it is time to move on to some new friends.  I'm not saying to be mean or rude to your old friends, just let them come around when they are ready.  They will realize what I good friend you are if they are smart.

Answer 8

they are not good enough to be your friends. find some people that are worthwhile

and they are not even close to friends if they act like that.

Answer 9

Sounds like a lot of my friends...Why are you still friends with them? I left a lot of them in this past year. Why was I friends with them? They were beeotchs. So why did I hang out with them if they were beeotchs? Because most girls at my school are popularity hungry beeotchs.

Answer 10

I think you should quit calling them friends because those aren't friends

Answer 11

You sound like such a nice person and a great friend!

First, I would have a talk with a few of your "closer friends" and just ask them why you don't hang out more and if they are embarrassed to be seen with you. Maybe they don't realize they are doing it.

Otherwise, they are just bad friends, ditch them.

You need to join other groups at school and meet new people. You will find people who really appreciate you and share common interests. Hang in there, high school isn't for everyone. Most people who aren't really popular as teens turn out to be really successful, well liked and ambitious adults. Good luck!

Answer 12

ughh. In high school i had a similar problem until 11th grade, just wait it out and make new friends-even go for a boyfriend or somthing.

Answer 13

i don't think that they are your real friends get new ones