I'm going through a long anti-social phase. Is this normal?

Question

I'm 17 and for a while now I haven't been wanting to hang out with my friends. I only have a few close friends, which is fine, I don't need a lot and I value quality over quantity, but for a while now I haven't really been wanting to hang out with anyone. I see them once in a while for lunch or a movie or whatever, but I never want to hang out with them when we're going to hang out with a bunch of other people. I feel like I'm so anti-social sometimes, but I know I'm young and that teenagers sometimes go through different phases in their lives. I've only been wanting to hang out with family lately, and when I do see my friends I never want to hang out with them for a long time. I hardly see them anyway though. When they try to make plans I always come up with excuses and I don't know why. I wish I knew why I didn't want to hang out. It's not like I have bad people skills, I still get out of the house and I'm not a shy person or anything. Is it possible to not be shy but to still be anti-social? I don't want to be a loner my entire life. I'm scared that one day I'm going to end up all by myself. Obviously I'm young so my life is not set in stone. I'm just worried about myself.

Answer 1

I think you're just going through a phase where you want to have family time instead of friend time. Sometimes being with friends can take a lot out of you, and maybe you just need a break from all that.

Teenagers do go through phases, I bet you've gone through the phase where you didn't want to hang out with your family or talk to them, and now it's the other way around. It'll pass =)

Answer 2

It probably is a stage of where you find it better hanging out with the family rather than friends. plus some things your friends might do you may see there is no point. you might be growing up wanting to move on, but now your probably experiencing the value of family and enjoying the company you have. Just enjoy it

Answer 3

you might have the early stages of anxiety/ depression. you may also have a fear of going out, which has a name, i cant remember it though. or like you said, you could just be going through a phase. try and talk to your family, as you seem close to them. try doing things with one very close friends and building up. if you can, talk to one of your friends. remember you dont have to go out every day! give other situations a chance, try and not refuse an invite, and if you do out of habit, ring your friend back and say you think you can get out of it. you don't have to be out for long, just make an appearance. however, if you really do fancy some alone time, take some! just do whatever feels best for you. good luck.

Answer 4

yeah i feel the same exact way and im 17 too.  i dont like to hang out with people and i dont really know why.  i like to hang out by myself in my room or just do stuff on my own.  i have always been really independent but i am afraid i will be lonely my whole life too.  i am outgoing as well so i dont know why but i just dont really feel like dealing with all the c**p.  so dont feel bad your not the only one.  i hope i grow out of it cause i feel bad when i see people that have like this huge group of friends and hang out all the time. you can email me if you wanna talk.  [e-mail]

Answer 5

Well I went throught that and looking back on it I have a couple of ideas - but they are not exactly pleasant.

It may be that you have outgrown your friends. Look at your first sentence "...I haven't been wanting to hang out with my friends." It says it right there. You're 17 and ready to move on experience bigger and better things. There is nothing wrong with your friends of course - it's just that sometimes a relationship end naturally or take a long break. There is an instinctive feel that you want to move on and make new friends, change your life. That is what I did, and looking back on it I found it was exactly what I was going through - and it was the best choice I had made. I still keep in touch with my old friends after a year or so, and it was like meeting an relative you haven't met in a long while. It'll all work out.

So no I don't think you're anti-social, just ready for a new life.  

Hope that helps.

Answer 6

wow that sounds just like me

you just made me feel so much better now at least i know that therw are other peopel who just like a lot of space, almost nobody i know wants to be alone or at home as much as i do