I'm moving to Milan! How difficult will it be to make friends?

Question

My Italian will be challenged at first, but I will be taking classes!....Is there any cultural knowledge that would be important to know before arriving? (I am 24 yr old female and defientely will be going out on the weekends....)

Answer 1

I lived in Italy for 3 years, just a few observations:

Italians in my experience are very helpful and patient with foreigners trying to learn the language because at least you're trying.  They seem to be very appreciative of the fact that you're learning their language and not just shouting at them slowly and loudly in English.

Italians are not big drinkers, especially the women, and most of the Italian women I knew would not have had more than a glass of wine or half a beer on a night out.  They smoke a lot but they don't drink.  Drinking is not really frowned upon but they don't have much of a drinking culture, pubs are very new to Italy.

In many ways it's quite a conservative country and their ideas can be very backward despite a misconception almost internationally that they are very laid back.

They have more than 3 police services - the Carabinieri (Military police), the Polizia, and the Guardia di Finanza (Financial Police), and lots of provincial and regional police services as well - all of whom are heavily armed.  Why a policeman needs a machine gun in a country that is not even vaguely at war is beyond me.

Bureaucracy is what the country is founded on and if they can make anything more difficult for you they will.  The huge number of forms that need filled out are for the most part to ensure that civil servants will have jobs to go to.  It is not in the interest of public servants to facilitate your needs either efficiently or helpfully so don't expect any dealing with public offices to be easy.

They have lots of rules as to when certain food can and cannot be eaten so expect to be ridiculed when you break any of these rules; drinking a cappuccino after 10am, it is only a breakfast drink and should NEVER under any circumstances be ordered after a meal; sitting down to drink your coffee, it is to be drunk quickly and while standing at the bar; eating lasagna in the summertime, it is a winter food because it requires you to use the oven thus creating what is essentially a radiator in your house, not what you want when it's 40 degrees outside; walking around barefoot, you just never make direct contact with the ground, wear slippers or flipflops at all times when not wearing shoes... the list goes on :-)

You must register where you're living at the police station (questura) but be careful to check that your landlord is "in regola" because a lot of apartments are not legally registered i.e. the landlord is not paying tax on your rent so you can't register that address with the police.

This brings me to my last point - There is a wide spread problem in Italy with tax evasion, a huge percentage of the population do not pay tax and work "in nero" as they put it.  It's an accepted part of Italian life that lots of people simply don't exist and on record have never actually worked in their lives.  It makes a lot of things difficult because you can't open a bank account without a work contract and without a bank account you can't have a mortgage.  It's hard to get a job that's "in regola" because the government gives very little incentive to employers to do things by the book and so many others are getting away with it, so why not? For the employee it's not a simple matter of not taking that illegal job because it's not like there are hundreds of jobs just sitting there. If you're not prepared to take the job there are lots of others who are. It's one great big mess.

Salaries are very low in most of Italy, I'm not sure about Milan but it's where all the Italians from other areas flood to looking for work so I would imagine that they must be higher there.

This all sounds very negative but it's probably important to be prepared beforehand.

Italy is also an extremely beautiful country, the people are lovely, the food is amazing and it's probably the most consistently beautiful place I know.  The train system for all its flaws is also fabulous, every tiny little town in the ******** of nowhere has a train station and it's very cheap to travel by train.  I loved my time there and if I could get a good job I'd go back tomorrow but it does have its flaws, lovable flaws like an eccentric old uncle or something.

Good luck with everything or as the Italians say "in bocca al lupo".

Answer 2

your very lucky.  im sure if your outgoing you will make a lot of friends!  I was thinking of moving to rome for a little while to learn italian.  Have fun!!