I'm pregnant. I need support. Are there any preadoptive people out there who will support me...?

Question

instead of following your own dream of adopting your own children? I just don't want to go to the states or 'rents for help.

I'm already pregnant and need money and other support to help me and my child stay together. Preadoptive people have teh money and time since they have no children of their own yet. You should help me because I already have a child on the way.

Answer 1

Sure, let me quit serving my community

There are plenty of resources to keep you and your child together. I gladly pay taxes. I won't complain about it, because I know how important public services are to families.

The following are just a few resources to help keep your family together:

WIC

Medicaid

Food stamps

Hannahs closet (provides the essensials for a new baby to come hme)

Food pantries

Section 8

Income based housing

AFDC (cash assistance)

Help me grow (Early intervention for at risk children)

Babysitting assistance

WIA (assistance to school tuition, books and gas to get there)

Federal financial aid for school

If you need any help find these resources feel fre to e-mail me.

If there is a will there is a way. There is no reason that money alone should keep you and your baby apart.

Good luck to you.

Answer 2

I wish I could give bonus points to JoHnS on this one.

Answer 3

It's so cute how you have already learned to "work" the system.

Answer 4

You need a rude awakening...get a job...and if you cant afford your Baby now imagine what having no diapers feels like...since they go thru about 3 bags a week at about $15 dollars a bag...and a jar of baby food is 89cents and formula is what these days $6 a can...not to mention the worst ....child care...sorry sweetie unless you get a sugar "daddy" or in your case find baby daddy you need to do this on your own.   Get off your butt and get busy.  p.s.  "YOU SHOULD HELP ME"  omg did yu really say that?????  You should help yourself..no pity party here.

Answer 5

You should at least sound a little more humble and appreciative when asking people you don't know to support you.  You shouldn't tell someone what they should or shouldn't do for you.  You don't mention what you have done for yourself first, before asking a stranger.  Have you applied for government assistance??  Is the father in the picture....his family...your family.  You sound very selfish and self centered.  Hopefully you aren't using your pregnancy to tug on childless couples heart strings.

Answer 6

Help yourself by getting a job.

Answer 7

I wonder why you're only asking this of parents who are considering adoption. There are many successful couples and single adults who haven't had biological children yet, why not ask them to postpone or put aside their dream of having a biological child and support you instead, since you already have a baby on the way and they don't?

Someone metioned hypocrasy earlier, but I'd like to pont out that none of the people who post regularly about the importance of family preservation have stepped up and said that they would help you in anyway. No one else said that they would give up having anymore biological children, or get a second job so you can raise your child without having to apply for help. Why is it that PAPs and APs are the only ones expected to help ot in this type of situation, especially when  others have such strong feelings about keeping bio families together?

I also wonder if the intent of this question is to make a point, especially since this is the first one you've asked or answered. But if this is your true situation, then you need to apply for government assistance. If you are in the US then there are enough programs available to allow you to raise your child on your own, without having to ask strangers to support you with their own money. Not wanting to bother your parents or spend time filling out government paperwork is no excuse. If you really want to be a parent then you need to show you are willing to put forth some effort, and make sacrifices, and not just expect someone you don't even know to take care of you because you think they "owe you" in some strange way.

Just on a side note, I have helped several single and young mothers who were working very hard to raise their children, and were not to proud to ask for government assistance.

Answer 8

Jackie,

I have 5 kids, if you don't mind that, you are welcome to my home.  I help many single mothers by watching their children for free so they can go to to college.  You won't go hungry or need for clothes.  You have to have goals.  If you are working to better your life and keep your child, i'll be there for you.  I'm in Wisconsin just email me if you need me.

Done having kids no worries there, just a helping hand.

Answer 9

I agree that your question seems suspect but oh well...

Look for a Gabriel Project in your area.  It is a program sponsored by the Catholic church.. it's not enough to be pro-life... you also have to be pro-active.

http://www.thegabrielproject.com/

If you question is in fact legitimate, good luck to you and your child.  I hope for the best for both of you.

Answer 10

"Pre-adoptive people have the money and time since they have no children of their own"

WHAT? Maybe for some, not for most.

"I just don't want to go to the states or 'rents for help."

WHY? but you can go to a stranger?

Quit trolling with your ignorance.

Answer 11

Dear "Jackie",

Sure. I'm not a PAP or AP but I have housed two other young women in crisis (as well as an entire family) before you so it won't be the first time. I have enduring friendships and three lovely Godchildren as a result.

I am also a very active volunteer for my community so if you are in need of resources, send me a list of what you need and I direct you to the proper agency, club, organization or whatever to assist you on getting on your feet so you can be SELF-SUFFICIANT AT SOME POINT.

E-mail me if you have any questions.

Or just visit this web site and help yourself:

http://www.keepyourbaby.com/alternatives...

***Funny how "support" for an expectant mother in crisis is treated as if it must be always be financial and forever....***

PS These kinds of Qs are getting old, do not make their intended "point" and quite frankly are insulting to all of us.

Answer 12

I know that this is a ridiculous idea...  yet people in here say adoptive parents should do it.  Yes, I've heard them too.  But, come on, already.  If  you will post your point in another way, you will come across much better; more intellignet.

PS- I am so "for" your opoinion...  but I reported you anyway.  Don't try to make PAPs and AP look ignorant.  :-)

Answer 13

YOU got pregnant not ME, so why should I help YOU raise YOUR child?  I took the necessary precautions to avoid having a child because I didn't want the responsibility (financial and otherwise) of having a child.  

You obviously weren't old enough to do the deed or you would have been prepared for the result...pregnancy.  Get off you lazy A S S and get a job!  YOU got pregnant. YOU can raise the baby ON YOUR OWN.  YOU shouldn't need any help.....did you need help when you decided to have s*x and risk getting pregnant?  Did you need help when you were having s*x?  NO!  Then you shouldn't be asking for help now!  YOU made your bed, now lay in it!

I am tired of irresponsible people like you procreating!  People like you breed more people like you...ignorant, whining, spineless, moochers!  Take responsibility for your actions and quit expecting other people to clean up your mistakes!

My sister made the mistake of having s*x without using protection and she got pregnant.  She graduated from High School and she got a job (actually, she got a job when she was 14 and worked for 3 years before she made her big mistake).  My sister never asked anyone for help, except when she needed to talk.  She did for herself and her child.  She went to college several years ago and just graduated with her teaching degree.  If she can do it, so can you!

Answer 14

There are numerous support agencies out there...but you will need to ask for them to be able to help you. I figure this is a 'joke' question anyway, but I might as well answer it. You could try your local DHEC....they will give you access to medicaid and food stamps....if you 'don't want to go to the ' 'rents' for help, then you will need to move out of their house....as they are 'helping you' by providing you a place to live. I strongly suggest that you lean on them for as much support as possible. While you are there, however, you need to check out freecycle.com and other such locations. I have received formual, bedding, clothing, coupons, furniture, etc from that one site.....all for free. You just need to be willing to ask for help.

I wish you well.

<<adoptive mommy through foster care.

Answer 15

Good for you.  I see paps all the time asking about how to raise money to adopt a child; so why not ask how to raise money to KEEP your child.

Hold your head high and proud and watch out for the hipocrisy that's gonna come flying your way!

Good luck

ETA:  They won't help you unless it means they can help themselves - to your baby

ETA for John and Ted, I would offer Jackie help via my family preservation organization but, alas it is based in the UK and Jackie is in the USA where such things appear to be non-existent without shame and riducule, sigh.

Answer 16

I think you came to the right spot, because I know I have seen some posters claim they want to help keep all families together.  And considering how much time some people spend on here, they have the time to help you as well.  Bonus.

I don't think they are PAP's though.  Does that matter?

ETA:  Heather B, there's always that nifty thing called a personal check, or money order, which can be sent across the pond, due to something called a post office. That is what the PAP's would be expected to write when helping out.  Afterall, it's from the heart and not for a tax break, right?

Answer 17

You could go to a church and ask them if there are any guys there that are not deadbeats. Tell them some other parent failed in raising to there son to be a stand up guy (which is a problem in the US)  and now your forced to raise your baby alone in society filled with self serving infertile people that just want to get there hands on something that money shouldn't be able to buy.   There's hope for the future though. Maybe if enough mommy's get dumped by their bread winning husbands and are left to fend for themselves, they'll wake up and start demanding our govt force the deadbeat daddy's to be responsible. Good poorly worded question but too bad its coming from someone thats trying to take advantage of someone in need.