I'm pregnant & don't know if i should tell him! please help me.?

Question

My partner & i recently split up! We had a major arguement & he left! I found out that night what he really thought of me & it hurt me alot! We argued mostly over his ex partner (he has kids with her) & she thinks because they have kids together that she can walk all over him & treat him like a bank. He works & nearly every penny he earns goes to her! Which i think is far to much, especially when she is receiving income support! When i asked him for help, i get told to go for a bus or taxi, when she asks, he runs over to help her! She's never worked a day in her life & expects everyone to run after her! Who was he dating, me or her? I was left out of everything, he would even go spent the day with her, her family & the kids.

I have 2 kids of my own, which i love & totally i adore & i would do anything for them! But i don't know if bringing this little life into it, is it going to make things worse, should i tell him or should i just deal with it on my own??

Answer 1

You should tell him, and I would still bring this little life into the world.  Your ex at least owes your child suppport and there are many agencies that can help you out in the meantime.  The Department of Human Services has a program that will help you with low-income child care while you work or go to school full time, and there are agencies that will pay for all of your medical bills for your baby and pregnancy.  My sister went through this very same thing.  That was 12 years ago, and she doesn't regret it at all.  She even got help from the government to get low-cost housing and was paying something like $49 per mo. based on her wages, so help is out there.  Tell him and go after him for child support and get all the help you can from family, friends, and various agencies, and churches.  Good luck and God Bless you.

Answer 2

You know what you should do???.....

Tell him (you have to its his child too), but then treat him the way she treats him, an milk everything! He needs to learn and he needs to get his priorities straight!! Your (or were) is Girlfriend not his ex, if he doesnt wanna know after you tell him to sort his priorities then claim everything u can off him just the way his ex does!!!!!!! Hope that helps!!!

PS you would think i hated men!! but i am happily married and love my hubby to death!

Answer 3

Wow this is a tough one. If you are keeping the baby I would tell him. As far as he goes, he will run back and forth between the both of you if allowed. I would definitely when the baby is born go for child support. He will be court ordered to pay for your child and the rest of them.  Sweetie I know you are in a bad situation but you need some sort of a support system from family and friends. I would concentrate on the baby growing inside of you and your other children. He would be the last one I would worry about. If you need someone to talk to you can use my e-mail address and I would be more than happy to help you through this. Good luck and God Bless (by telling him he will be upset but he will have to get over it and no you shouldn't have to deal with this on your own you didn't make this baby by yourself)

Answer 4

Please don't act in hast. Don't do anything you might regret later. It sounds like he is really devoted to his other kids so

chances are he will fill the same way about this one. But it doesn't sound like you are very important to him. It sounds like

he still wants to be with his ex. You do need to talk it over with

him because this baby is his responsibility too. He helped make the baby so he should be included in all decisions. But talk it over with him and make a decision together that you

both can live with.  Good luck and God bless.

Answer 5

Either way he has the right to know his child is on the way. Tell him and then decide, depending on his reaction. It's not fair to decide to keep or get rid of the child without telling him.

I think the best way to find the answer is to think of the right question. In this instance you should ask yourself 'do I want this child if he is not going to contribute?' That would be the worst case scenario, so think about if you can handle it if that happened. Also ask yourself 'Do I want this child if we are not together anymore and he is only partially involved?'

The key thing here is I don't think this baby should be a reason for you to get back together, it sounds like the realtionship wasn't going well anyway, so look at it from a single parent point of view.

Answer 6

I think you should tell him, don't keep the worry all to yourself, this is his responsibility too. Whether or not you want another child can only be your decision, but do what you think is best for you.  It's a tough decision and you sound like your having a hard time as it is! Is there anyone you could talk to or get some advice from?

Good luck, i hope everything works out for the best!

Answer 7

i think you should consider what happen if you tell him that you're pregnant...i think this man wouldn't care for you either you tell him or not...

don't waste your time for this guy, there are still man out there care and willing to nice to you..

i'm sorry if my english was bad

Answer 8

I was in the same aboat 3 years ago, me and my ex had split up but i got pregnent at the end of the relationship. i told him as he had a right to no, when i got to about 3 months gone we got back together and we got on great, we had a stunning little girl and are family was perfect!! now 3 years have past and i ended the relationship, as i didn't love him anymore but he really tried to give it another go with me and he still did when i had moved on, and i think he was only doing it for my little girls sake...

Now we still get on well, and he has moved on, but he still dose everything for me! I dnt think that he is still in love with me its the fact he gets to spend the time with him little girl, so dont be hurt that he spend time with her coz really he just spending time with his kids.

I wish you all the best with your new child, tell him!! he sounds a good fella and a good family man what do you have to lose??!!! i

Answer 9

Tell him sooner rather than later

Answer 10

I feel that you should tell him so as to get it sorted at this early stage.  If you leave it and then tell him he will have an argument of 'why didn't you tell me before this'

Answer 11

Depends what you mean by deal with it.  If you mean dont have the baby and have an abortion.. then thats entirely your decision.  Maybe it is the best thing you can do.

But if you want to bring the baby up by yourself, then its a difficult situation, i believe the baby and its father have the right to know of each other's existance.  However, your ex partner may think that you got pregnant on purpose.

Whichever, i dont think you should be with this person, he doesnt seem to respect you and bringing up a child in this environment is not a good idea.

Answer 12

Who else will you tell my dear ? After all he is the father .

Answer 13

Tell him and get him to pay you child support as well. That will teach the jerk a lesson.

Answer 14

I really feel for you. I think you need to make the decision alone for you.

Some people will argue that he has a right to know but he doesn't sound as though he would be very committed to you or a baby.

Good luck. x

Answer 15

YES...let him deside if he doesn't want to be a part of the childs life or not.

Answer 16

It is his responsibility as much as yours.  Tell him and claim maintenance.

Answer 17

NO YOU SHOULD TELL HiM!! iF iT MAKES THiNGS WORST THEN DO WHAT HIS EX PARTNER DOES!! AND iF IT CHANGES THINGS FOR THE BETTER.THEN THATS GOOD HE MIGHT JUST REALIZE WHO HE'S DATIN..I WISH YOU LUCK TO YOU AND YOU KIDS..AND THE ONE ON THE WAY!!