I'm really dreading going back to work.?

Question

I just went through years of graduate school to get a PhD, which was stressful and torturous. But the idea was that it would get me a better future.

Instead, I took what I could get because the market is so competitive, and landed in a job I dislike. Whereas at my graduate school, I was awarded teacher of the year, at this University, the students complain about me incessantly. Whereas I had friends and colleagues at my old University, here I am looked upon suspiciously and am close to no one. I have so much work piled up ahead of me, and no motivation whatsoever to do any of it. My love for learning and teaching is fast fading to dread in this environment.

I'd quit and try and find another school to teach at, only that's not the way it works in academia. There have to be job openings, and all offers are for a year in advance (starting NEXT september), and it's highly, highly, highly competitive. I'm probably lucky to have a job at all, as it is. So saying, "just quit!" or "find a new job!" won't be helpful.

What should I do? How can I make myself want to be here? Should I chuck it all and do something else with my life? I've always wanted to be a teacher. Should I just waste my PhD and go be a waitress or something? That seems wrong. At least now I understand why women sometimes give everything up and marry someone who just takes care of everything for them. But I'm not that girl, either.

I don't even know that there IS an answer to this question. I suppose I find myself feeling a bit depressed, and was hoping that shouting into the giant chasm of the internet might bring me back some comforting echos... any thoughts?

Answer 1

hi , if this is of any comfort to you -- there are many ladies who give up everything up either for a marriage/for kids / or cos the family has moved. There are many others who are itching for such a situation so that they may give all these hassles up  and enjoy............. But after sometime, one does miss the satisfaction of having finished a job , the sense of responsibility ....................

Anyway persevere --  i am sure things will get better. Apply for the other jobs which anyway will not be effective till next year. Persevere till then -- for all u know by the end of the session -- the environment may have changed. Self motivate and keep teaching for your own satisfaction...................

Answer 2

If you're getting complaints from the students, that's a GOOD thing!  LOL.  As for the colleagues, that's a different story.  Many good teachers only have bachelor of education degrees.  By going on and getting your Doctorate you have taken the steps needed to jump ahead of them and they know it!  Don't make them be formal about your degree.  Let them know you want to be called by your name, not by Dr. Betternyew.  By getting that PhD thing out of your way, you can build a better relationship with them.  Let them know they are your equals by rank, and that the PhD is what you did before you started teaching so you could get that stuff out of the way early.

As for teaching, I salute you.  However, nobody teaches.  Everyone learns, though.  Teaching is simply presenting the facts and making students absorb what they must.  However, education is teaching students to think independently, questioning incomplete information and finding a way to quench a thirst that is called ignorance.   If you can challenge your students to better themselves by thinking independently you can turn out a lot more straight-A students who actually earned their marks in school, just like you earned your degree.

As for the new job, look for next year, and take the lumps for this year.  You might just find that things get better pretty quickly, once the school year really gets underway.  After all, the glamour parts of the job come from getting gritty in the trenches and working day and night.