I'm thinking about getting pregnant...I need someone to help me please?!?

Question

I am 22yrs old, never been pregnant, I have a 2 bedroom house, a great job...but I'm single, and have a relationship with God. Thing is, living in my 2-bedroom house has made me want to get pregnant, I know its against our religion but I can't help the feeling, and I don't want to get married, I just really want a baby, my ex is willing to do this for me, we are the best of friends and still love eachother and feel we can really raise a kid and not end up hating eachother...anyone think this is a good idea?

Answer 1

uhhhhh NO!!!!!!

Answer 2

Wow. You're young, though. I'm 21 and can't see me having a kid for another few years. But that's me. I think that what you want to do is a bad idea. You are probably going through some kind of funk where you want someone with you to feel loved and needed. And having a baby is a long term thing. You'd have to raise the kid and that's a lot of work from what I've seen. Not to mention the money that goes into that. I have two friends and a sister that have kids and are young. They are having a hard time with dealing with money issues. And all three of them have a "guy", but they don't do much. They said they would be there and help out, but once they are actually living through it, it's a different story. Look, you really have to write out your pros and cons. It's ultimately up to you, but make sure you REALLY think about it. Instead, why don't you join Big Brothers Big Sisters of America? You get to mentor, take care, and sometimes take kids out. You're assigned to one kid and you work with them. You should look into it.

Hope everything goes ok.

Answer 3

I think it would be common to want a child.  My girlfriend wants a child every time she sees someone else, but I think you are short-sighted in how you go about this.  Every child deserves a shot to grow up in a loving home with both parents present.  How the parents act toward each other is how the child perceives a relationship should appear.  If the parents' relationship is casual, then the child will likely have trouble getting comfortable in a deep relationship.  Anyway, food for thought.

Answer 4

i would wait till you get in a good relationship with someone you truly love and want to spend the rest of your life with.  i'm 22 and have a 6 week old, i am married to someone i want to spend the rest of my life with and its still REALLY hard, to be honest, a lot harder than i ever imagined.  i don't see how i could have done it on my own. make sure you are really ready, i noticed you said living in your 2 bedroom apt made you want to get pregnant, in my opinion, that is not a good reason to have a baby!   i wish both of you best of luck!!

Answer 5

Well, you sort of telegraphed the answer that you expected to get.  For my part, I don't think it's a good idea.  My 18 YO unmarried daughter has an 8 week old baby and she of course loves him like crazy; but still, she's 18 and not yet married (although they have plans.)

Babies - and children - are a forever commitment.   You may think you can raise a kid and not end up hating each other, but other than your "want" for a child I don't see anything that tells me that you view a child as a lifetime commitment.

I'm sorry to be blunt, and I may not have a complete picture of what's going on, but based solely on your post, my heart tells me that this is a mistake.

Answer 6

i can see the good and the bad that could come out of this.I think you're still young. Who knows in a year you could meet someone that you want to marry and he wants to spend his life with you too. Wouldn't you rather have that when starting a family.

  That is my own opinion but if you and your ex are willing to be there for the baby then  I guess you need to follow your heart. Good luck.

Answer 7

Once you do this, you can never go back.  If your ex is willing to get you pregnant, he should be "willing" to marry you because he will be the father of your child for the rest of his life.  It's not like he's just "doing this" and going on his way.  If you want a baby really bad and are VERY SURE you don't want a relationship, go to a sperm bank.  At least then you won't have the father constantly in your life.  If you don't want a romantic relationship with him, then you sure don't want to have a child with him.  Emotions are a big part of raising a child and you sure don't want a bad relationship between you and your child and your ex from now on.  Which, I can guarantee, it will be.  THINK, THINK, THINK.  If the empty bedroom bothers that much, move to a one bedroom!

Answer 8

No, I don't, because the majority of the work is going to land on you and you are going to end up bitter, because it is A LOT OF WORK! You are very young still, and have a great chance of finding somebody who you can marry and have a baby with. To fill the void for now, you could look into fostering a child, there are a lot out there who need the love and support of an adult.