I've changed but....I think it's starting to suck.?

Question

For the past 4 years I have been going to a therapy group. In that time I have found myself more and more. But my improvement has driven people away, I can't make friends now because I'm not into the whole get drunk and have fun because I see it as a self-esteem killer. I had to end a friendship because her friends thought I was awkward and whenever they would be around she would ignore me but still act like a friend.

And My family just kinda doesn't talk to me. All because I tell people my feelings now regardless of whether or not it agrees with them and I feel a need to help people with what I have learned.

I have improved sooo much, I have lost nearly 100lbs, I'm more confident (I used to be a total pushover) overall I feel sooo much better about myself. But it's begininng to get really lonely because I'm just not running into the people that are kind and considerate.

Is this path worth it?

Answer 1

I think that you are on the right path.

If people can't accept you for who you are, who cares?

They are the wrong people for you. Who wants to deal with that anyway?

Maybe you are trying too hard. Shallow people tend to push people away that are needy. They have better things to do-like going out and getting drunk and waking up beside some s***k they met the night before.

My husband doesn't party either. He's fine with the way he is and everybody has learned to accept him for what he wants to do.

We only get one chance in this world. Get on myspace. Network. Seek out some activities that make you feel good.

There are people out there with similar interests. Maybe they are looking for a buddy,too!

Answer 2

now that you've changed the people that you used to hang with, get drunk with were created by you and what your needs were based on that phase of your life. now your reaching for something different being courageous enough to change and so your "old" world is just that, base on who you used to be. "suck" is all relative because if you think about it your whole world has been re arranged turned upside down and it's really only just begun. you're finding yourself more and more the layers of your onion have only just begun to peel. look there's another layer...

whether it's "worth it" is for you to decide. you have chosen to do something different with your life. you have asked and are doing the "work"  it takes to change. go easy and if you can't go easy go as easy as you can. get a sponcer. go to a lot of meetings. get as much support as you can. there are a lot of people like you that are feeling the same way and a lot of people still getting drunk still overeating and basically altering their moods and to the latter you are no longer the same hence a stranger. plus you may be just figuring out who the h**l you are now and hence a stranger to even your self. you have chosen something different and now your "stuff" is bubbling up and sometimes it's painful to look at and that's where the meetings and talking to people who are going through the same thing is very helpful.

keep a journal. become your own best friend. don't isolate. keep coming back. you're worth it.

Answer 3

yes ,you are on the right track,stay there the rewards will come to you and you will wonder what you ever saw in those other people