I Dont Want To Move....?

Question

Alright. Lets start from the beginning. Im warning you, this might be long and might even extend into the additional details section. Alright, Im a country kid, well i had land, but no wi dont. But ive always been a country kid, i HATE the city. And horses, which are really the only thing that makes me truly happy are here, in the COUNTRY. well, my mom, who also hates the city wants to move to a big city/marina type area. We, dont have a lot of money. And she wants to just leave before our lease is up, and just ignore the rest because we're filing bankruptcy anways, and DONT say that that is against the law, i already freaking know. Anyways, i know she would hate it there but she says she hates it here, because we had to move into teh trailer park after she got divorced. Well, she is acting purely upon the fact that she got offered a house, not a trailer for cheap. The house is only freaking 800 square feet, smaller than our trailer. Well its actually a modular home. Anyways, she is

Answer 1

First - Get some help with your feelings.  This is a very difficult time and you feel helpless.  A school counselor or church minister or even a professional counselor may be able to help you with this conflict.  As for your mother,  she doesn't sound completely in control.  Having to declare bankruptcy is a very upsetting adult event.  It may mean less to country kid.   I know you can't fix things.   You can help your mother get through this particular time.  By helping her,  she may be able to see you're on her side and that your needs are hers too.  There are plenty of country places to live and it may be that after you've lived in city in a really lousy place, she'll see your side of things.  When adults have big problems, usually they have to work through the problems before they can deal with other matters.  So maybe you can be patient, help her and end up where you want to be in the end.    Good luck.

Answer 2

You can stay.  You don't have to move.  Look for the oldest neighbor you can find.  Ask her if she would let you live-in and work as a caretaker for her.  She would offer to pay you to shop for her.  We paid a young woman $250 a month and free room and all she could eat (mom didn't eat much when she was old).  Get to work.  You can make this fun.

Answer 3

You didnt say how old you were.  And yes, you sound like a whining immature spoiled brat.  However, that is beside the point.  Basically you dont want to leave your school or friends, right.

Unfortunately, If you are under the age of 18 yrs old, you have nothing to say in what your mother does or where she moves you to. By law, you will have to go with her.  $50.00 right now is alot of money to save.  She may have to do this to make ends meet.  If you and your brother are 16 or 17 yrs old, get a part time job after school and help out with the bills.  Then you might know the value of saving $50.00.  

Sorry to sound tough on you, but kids nowadays just dont know what is good for them or know the value of money.  Most take everything for granted and expect everything to go their way.  That doesnt happen in the real world.  All 5 of my kids learned the hard way, by experience.

Edit:

By the way, my kids lived in cities for most of their life, then moved to the country, where they couldnt stand it.   I grew up in the country and moved to the city.  I have moved around for most of my life since I was a kid, so I have had the benefit of both lives. So yes I do understand. You lose friends.  But you make new ones.

Give your mom a break!! She is doing what she feels is right and either way, you still have no say so in the matter.  Also, whoever said move in with a neighbor is very wrong.  The only way you could stay where you are is if a family member takes temporary custody of you and you live with them WITH your mothers permission.  You cannot just decide to stay.  You will be grown up enough to make your own decisions soon enough.

Answer 4

If you're a minor and your mom has custody then you go where she goes.  Parents often do dumb things - just like kids.  Maybe you can go live with your father.  If not, you're stuck.

Answer 5

I have a couple of daughters about your age, 14 and 16.

They do not often like the decisions I have to make  either.   They honestly do not fully understand the many aspects of some situations.

Do you have family in the country?   You sould mature enough to me to know what atmosphere you need to thrive, but your mother is not in a position to provide that right now.

Maybe the thing to do is stop fighting with her (trust me, she is stressed over this) and maybe look for a win-win solution for the 2 of you.