I Feel Like a Bad Parent?

Question

I have 8 children and have never felt this way before, but that may be because they were closer in age, so they didn't have way different rules. I feel like I am a worse parent to my 14 year old than to the 4 year olds. She is allowed to eat whatever she wants for snacks, whenever, while the 4 year old is not. She does not have a bedtime in summer, while 4 year olds do. She eats dinner with us, but she can eat snacks whenever. She is healthy and thin and makes good choices, but still. Am I a worse parent to her than the other 2? Or am I just over analyzing?

Answer 1

You're overanalyzing. Your older child has earned the right to more privileges. As you said yourself, she makes good choices. Instead of worrying about doing something wrong, you should be patting yourself on the back. Of course the rules are different for a teenager than a preschooler. When your four-year-olds are teenagers, they, too, will have different rules than they do now.

Answer 2

4 years to 14 years...what is the different...4 should have a bedtime regardless of the time of year. They need as much sleep as possible. Just because they are young does not mean they can keep on going. Having a healthy snack, food at a regular time is good for the young ones.

The 14 is growing up and as long as she doesn't fall off the edge let her grow, think of it as the 4 year old will see what she is doing and when she get that age, she'll have something to look forward to. As long as the 14 is doing right and help teach the young ones, there is know harm.

And until you really have a reason to think you have a problem, just enjoy much as you can. If you feel like you have done good with the older ones, what are you worried about? Just take a deep breath and relax.

Answer 3

I think you are over analyzing when i was 14or15 I didn't have a bedtime in the summer time but my younger siblings did. In my opinion as kids get older they get different privileges and when your younger kids get that age they will have the same privileges  

Answer 4

Depends, how was the 14 yr old treated when she was 4?

Answer 5

you're WAY overanalyzing, lol.

the changes just reflect your changing attitudes as you aged and got more experience.

Answer 6

your just over analyzing . The older kids get they should have more privalges  

Answer 7

Children of different ages need different rules, when your 4 year old is 14 they will have the same rules your now 14 year old has. I assume that your 14 year old did not have these rules when they were 4.

Good luck ( with 8 kids you deserve it lol)