I Need Some Advice..?

Question

Two years ago, after completing community college, i transferred to a 4 year university and moved out on my own for the first time. However, the university that i transferred to didn't have many opportunities for socializing (most students commuted and lived with in about a 50 mile radius). So during that time, i was sort of on my own, wasn't doing much socializing, just kind of by myself for a year.

I didn't like that, so i moved back home and just decided to commute to a local university. However, since i moved back a year ago, i have still felt very isolated. I went from feeling like part of a group, like i was wanted and safe, to feeling very alone and just sort of out in the world on my own. Even though i hang out with my old friends, starting dating again, and spend time with my family, i still feel alone. I still feel like the world is sort of dark and cold and i am on my own.

Is there any way to get over these feelings and start to feel like i am part of the group again, that i am supported and not really alone?

Answer 1

i think u should hit the local clubs and check out the social scene. partying it up for a while might help. but do remember, u r in school and u do need to be focused.

Answer 2

In the end, we all feel alone at all times. It is a part of the process of separating from the place you call home to another place. You need to learn how to break free of your childhood home and start venturing out by yourself.

All of us feel sort of alone when we start living on our own. But continue to make friends, date, and spend time with the family because that way you will know that even though you are physically alone, you aren't mentally alone.  

Answer 3

Adjusting to change is often tough. I have felt that way before, like an outsider watching everyone else live. I found myself always comparing my life to what I thought other peoples' lives were. Then, I got into therapy & learned to stop that comparison. Most peoples' lives are not what I build them into. Try to see your life for what it IS & don't get trapped on the terminal " I am different" treadmill. Focus on as many similiarities that you have with people as possible. Seek help if necessary.  

Answer 4

Force yourself to get out there.  If doing your usual thing is no longer satisfying, try something a bit out of your comfort zone...go to a new coffee shop and chat up some people, patronize stores in a different part of town, talk to random strangers at the grocery store (no I don't mean stalker like stuff, just a quick line about the quality of the strawberries may turn into a pleasant exchange).  You are definitely in a transitional phase of your life, the familiar is no longer satisfying but the unkonown is scary...I have been there, just make yourself do it and it will get easier.  Good luck!!