I Really Need A Mature, Realistic, Experienced Point of View?

Question

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AjalQUEFvJ.C3lAmznv3FQDsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20080829225710AArwBKT

Thank you for any input you can give me.

I asked this question once before in Senior Category but it did not post.

Answer 1

I was going to do the same thing that Sassy did, but she beat me to it, lol.

Now to answer your question. You did do the right thing. She should have been paying more money to you than she was. It does not make you a bad person at all.

Answer 2

I can't answer your question if you don't post it and I don't open links so sorry, but you really should post the question.

DeeJay.

Edit: Thumbs down - No answer - No star for you.

Answer 3

The original post was:

"Does this make me a monster?

Tonight I asked my sister to leave my house.

She is 50yrs old with no children and makes more money than I do. She has a serious spending problem

I am 34 with a teenage son.

She did pay a small amt of rent (nothing else) but she was invading my privacy and personal time. She is not disabled or otherwise. I let her live with me for six months. She was supposed to save money and pay off bills but...

So tonight I politely asked her to make plans to leave soon.

She got angry and began to pack immediately.

So do you think I am wrong. Does that make me a monster?

19 hours ago - 1 week left to answer.

Additional Details

19 hours ago

She does have a place to go. She is going to move in with another relative. Closer to her age & with more in common."

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You gave her a chance and she's old enough to be on her own.  She has to learn how to budget her money so she can pay for her own things, all of her things including food and utilities and all that necessary stuff--and she can't do that if she's living off of your generosity.  She'll be mad because you've just wrecked her sweet little scam.  Big deal.  Siblings fight, I fight with my sibs (one in particular) all the time.  Don't worry about it.  You didn't tell her she had to move out immediately, this minute; she did that herself.  You've been "enabling" her to live like a princess.  It's now time for her to grow up and I hope the relative she's moving in with knows what he or she or they are getting into (if they ask you, be honest; otherwise, just stay out of it).

Answer 4

Hello,   Siblings !  sometimes their needs seem pretty important to them so much that selfishness creeps in, unknowingly invading upon others goodwill. You have done what you think is right, above all part as sisters with love in your hearts for each other. Good Luck.

Answer 5

I went there and answered. Good for you to post like that. More ways to skin a cat then one. Right ?? Enjoy the peace & serenity but clear the air with a hug before she leaves, if you possibly can.~~~ Jill

Answer 6

Yes, you did the right thing. You need to do what is right for YOU. Good luck

Answer 7

No; your sister should help with living expenses. It would be a good idea for you and your sister to become legal partners in a home together. One where you and she had your own private living space. Separate entrances, kitchens and bath room. Like a two flat building.

Answer 8

You gave her 6 months. You told her to find another place. She started packing right away. Sounds like she was ready to go.

Answer 9

I am sure you will hear "am I my brothers keeper", in this case your sisters keeper? No you are not. In fact, letting your sister stay with you and be dependent on you is probably the worst thing you can do for her. Like the birds of the air, when the time comes, they push the fledglings from the nest. They know they have to fend for themselves. It is not like you sister is unable to care for herself. She is able but will not do it if she can use someone else as a crutch. Tough love, works on kids, works on adults.  

Answer 10

Repeat from other site . . .

Don't let the guilt pull you down ! you did the right thing !  you are a giver, she is a user !  I like your personality better ! Maybe she will get the hint when the next relative asks her to leave too !

Answer 11

You tried to help, if she is incapable of managing her money at 50 chances are she is not going to change.  Letting her live 'cheeep' just enables her to go further in the hole.  You did the right thing to ask her to move.  

Answer 12

Even family members can "forget" their obligations, and it sounds like your sister did just that. You took her into your heart and home, and she simply took advantage of the situation. After six months of things not changing, you had every right to take a stand....and it doesn't mean you don't love her. Don't let her or anyone else in your family make you feel guilty. She's most likely going to do the same thing to the other relative she's moving in with...and sadly they'll end up being in the same position you were in.

Sorry you're going through this. Just make peace with your decision and remind yourself that you've done what's best for yourself and your son.