I am 18 years old and my mom is pregnant and I want to adopt her baby. I am still going to live with her.help!

Question

I love babies and I told her I wanted to "legally adopt" he baby and she said if it was possible it would be ok with her since she knew that I would take really good care of the baby and besides it wouldn't really make a difference since I am going to be living with my mom so whether I adopt the baby or not we will still both take care of the baby. help! Is it possible to adopt your baby brother/sister? Will this affect the baby in any way? Like will he/she feel unwanted because my mom gave him/her up for adoption to me?

Answer 1

You're saying that YOU want to adopt your mom's baby...you are saying nothing about that is what your mother wants.... Besides that it "would be ok with her" since she knows you would take good care. Does that not sound strange to you? And YES it would make a difference...and you're not going to be living with your mother forever. You're not going to college either?

What's wrong with being a Big Sister? It is going to be way confusing to the child.....is the child going to call You mommy and your mom grandma? It doesnt seem to make sense, with the explanation you gave. You pretty much said my mom is pregnant and since I just love babies I wanna take hers and adopt..... Where is the father in all of this?

Answer 2

uuuum  crazy thought here but maybe your mom should be a mom and you should be a sister?  I don;t know maybe I'm way off base here..... anyone?

Answer 3

you are only 18 years old,  I understand loving babies and all but you have your future to think about, not raising your baby brother/sister.  My opinion, Your mom needs to raise her baby, she got herself into this situation.   Go to college or whatever,  get a decent job and then think about having kids.  In order for you to prove that you can care for this child, you need to have a suitable place to live.  I'm not sorry with your mom.  You need to think about this more.  I am sorry if you don't like my answer but think about your future.  Are you planning on getting married?  Not saying that all guys are this way but, I think it would be harder for you to find the right person with baggage. (per say)  But this is your decision,  Good luck in what you choose to do.  I just ask that you think about this more.

Answer 4

there is no reason for it. so why do you want to do it. i could see if your mom was saying that she didnt want the baby and you did that but that doesnt seem to be the case

Answer 5

From a mother who had a child at 18...please don't adopt this baby. It is one thing to be "good with kids" and another to be a parent.

If there is a reason your mother can not take care of this child, then maybe adoption to a different family might be the better option.

Another thing to consider...the child. How is it going to feel, knowing that Grandma is really Mommy. Something like that can really s***w up a kid's head.

Live YOUR life first. Go to school, find a spouse, get married, and then think about having children. Like someone else just said, babies are just puppies you can trade off, they are a lot of time, love, work, and patience.

Please, for the baby's sake, rethink this.

Answer 6

The most important thing to remember is that the baby feel loved 100% and for you to love him or her unconditionally...as a parent should.   You must understand and be willing to make the sacrifices needed to raise children.  You must also be able to provide safety and stability.

Yes, you can legally adopt the baby.  You will need to find a good lawyer to handle the adoption procedures.  The lawyer will explain everything you need to know and guide you and your mother through this difficult albeit joyous time....

Good luck.

Answer 7

Why would you want to do that??

Answer 8

i am sure it is possible, but in alot of states you must be 21 to adopt.  also, the father has a voice in this too. There's always guardianship.

Answer 9

Not sure what the point would be since you all live together.  The father would have to agree with the adoption as well (assuming you all know who he is).  It is possible but kind of "different".

Answer 10

i think thatd course alot of problems for the bab n u n ur mum  now n wen the kids older

r u sure ur mum was seriouse bout lettin u adopt her baby

if u reli wanta baby y dont u have ur own

iv neva heard of sum 1 lettin herr child adopt there other child 4

no real reason  n if it wouldnt reli make any diifrence y dost  ur mum keep the baby n u help look afta it

i dont reli c a good reason 4 u 2 want 2 adopt the baby  or 4 ur mum hu is willin 2 giv the baby 2 u

y dont u try 4 ur own baby or study child cae so u can take care of children being  a parent is a hard job

Answer 11

why would you want to adpot ur own brother or sister? either way you are going to be there to help take care of it and participate in raising it...the only reason why u would want to do this is if your mom is unfit to take care of it...and why would ur mom want to give you legal rights over her child? your only 18 and taking care of a baby is a lot of respondsibility

Answer 12

Maybe it's just me but that is so strange. Why would you want to do this??

That is you brother/sister. Once you have children that child will get put on the back burner... and what will happen when you move out? Who would she call Mom? What the h**l, what is the point of your Mom doing that unless she is unable to care for the child....

sooo strange.

Answer 13

Im not sure I understand why she would want to let you adopt her baby. But yes it is possible.

Answer 14

well... im not sure why you wanna adopt your own bro/sis... kinda wierd... but whatever..

unfortunatelly, not sure if that's even legal... sorry!

Answer 15

Pardon but are you sick, first what makes you want to adopt a baby, i dont buy the LOVE of BABIES c**p, secondly what makes you think you can do a better job then you mom, love alone does'nt raise children (well it does, it raises ustable criminals ) and you want to be the mother of a crook then go  ahead, but seroiusly no matter what you think this isn't about the baby, you are looking for something else be honest with yourself and find out what that is and the look back ad see if you still want a baby

Answer 16

I'm confused, how old's your mom? Is she sick, why would she want to give up a child to a child. No offense.

Answer 17

the baby may feel unwanted later one, but you never know. I think you should let your mom keep the baby for a couple of months, and then decide if you are ready. since you are still young

:)

Answer 18

Yes that would be possible and yes it does affect the child.

My husband and I work with youth and kids who have been adopted or who are unadoptable state kids and they both alike run into the same problems.

They can have attatchment disorders and such things like that.   Why would you want to adopt your sibling and yet continue to live with your mom??

Why not let your mom raise her  baby and you just help and then one day when you are ready have one of your own.

Answer 19

its your sister so you already have a relationship with the baby -why is that not enough?

I think its wierd to adopt your sister (unless you are orphans or something) but is it just to play 'mummy' ????

just be a wonderful big sister to her I cant even believe your Mum would agree to such a strange suggestion!

Beside the poor kid will be calling its sister 'mum' and its Mum 'Grandma', poor kid will be very confused

its unnecessary to adopt someone who is already a family member!

Answer 20

I'm wondering why your mother wants to allow you to adopt her baby, but she will still be providing a home, living with, and taking care of the baby. I'm also concerned by the statement "besides it wouldn't really make a difference since I am going to be living with my mom so whether I adopt the baby or not we will still both take care of the baby". If you adopt the baby, then you will become her mother, for the rest of their life. You will be soley responsible for her including financially. When you move out of your mothers home, your child will go with you, and when you meet someone and get married this child will be your husband's step daughter.Yes, it will affect the child in many ways. I imagine that she will have a difficult time understanding the reasoning behind her adoption as well.

Adopting is a perminant decision, not just something to do  just because you like babies and think it'd be fun to be a mom for now.

Answer 21

Babies aren't puppies to be randomly traded between you and your mother.

You didn't even mention the baby's father who also gets a substantial say in this arrangement.

Answer 22

why would you both want to do this?

Answer 23

You can but for what reason do you want to do that.  Its yourbrother/sister not your son/daughter.  If your living with your mom anyway I dont see the point of confusing the child with adoption when he/shes older.

Answer 24

Why not just be a really involved big sister. What would the point to adopting your little sister be? Is your mom capable of raising your sister? I'm not sure I understand why your mother would be wanting you to adopt her?

Answer 25

Is your mom unable to take care of the baby? That's the only way I see possible that the court will let you adopt the baby. They will want you to be financially stable. The child will always call your mother mom not you b.c your mother is in the house. I don't think the courts will let you until you move into your own place!!

Answer 26

your 18, and you live with your mom....does it really sound like your able to take care of a child by yourself??  One of these days you'll have to move out..besides..I see it as a mistake..legally the child would  be yours if you adopted... so it would not be your moms responsibility...but it just seems as if it would be a mistake b/c more than likely your mom will still act like the "MOM" and not the grandparent...  if she can't take care of the child then it can be an understandable situation but other than that..it's prolly going to be a headache..even though you'll be the guardian she'lll still make the rule...

Answer 27

I would suggest that you just wait on it. In order to be approved for an adoption you must complete a home study, be fingerprinted, pay numerous legal fees, and provide proof that you could financially support the child. Since you are living with your mother you are not likely to be able to meet these requirements. However, if you continue to live with your mother and raise this child as your own until you are a bit older and better able to provide for the child on your own (AKA, have your own place and enough income) I would suggest that you pursue the adoption at that point.

Now, all of this is assuming that you are only wanting to adopt becuase your mother is older and perhaps less interested in raising this child than you are. If that is not the case and your mother is UNABLE to care of this child (on drugs, no income, etc) then the child will be in danger of being placed in foster care and I would highly suggest that you get out on your own as soon as possible and that you DO pursue this adoption at this time. Under these circumstances you would not be required to pay the legal fees mentioned above.

As for the child being unhappy or feeling unwanted under these circumstances...not likely. Children adopted within the same family are often more well adjusted than children adopted to non family members (generally speaking).

Answer 28

She may feel unwanted. But why do you want to adopt your sister it would only complicate things

Answer 29

what you want to do is senseless and i don't  understand why you want to go through all the paper work. there is no need for what  you want to do because you'll be living under the same roof as the child and most of all you are depriving the child of the same privileges that you had.