I am 18 years old and pregnant, and I would like some advice from people who have been in this situation.

Question

I am heading out to college in a month and I am going to a private Christian institution which has a no tolerance policy for unmarried prenancies. I am very unsure of whether I should keep this baby and postpone college for a year, or if I should have an abortion and wait until I am ready for children. I am also in a stable relationship with someone who will support my decision either way.

Please, I am not looking for what you think I should do, but what you did or what you would do in my situation.

Thank you.

Answer 1

I agree with Meghan above....not because I am against abortion or anything because you never know what wonders that child inside of you could bring into youre life!!!

I also think its mean for the college to have that policy.

Answer 2

If the college is against unmarried pregnancy they are most likely against abortion although they would never know. I would call the school first and see if they have any programs that would help me because I'm sure they would much rather you have the baby than an abortion.

  

Or you could solve both problems by getting married but that may not be a commitment that you want to make.

I would probably freak and get an abortion but then I would regret it. This baby will probably be one of the best things that could happen to you so i would keep it and if there is no way of going to that school I would go to one that is more accepting of your situation. Dont forget about your education.

Answer 3

i am 18 and i have a son who is 4 months. At the time when i found out i was pregnant i was 17 and bout to go off to college.  i decided not to go off ,instead i go to a community college. I'm happy with my decision, my son is the best thing that has happened to me and his father

Answer 4

I was in your position a long time ago, 10 to be exact. i was 18 and pregnant, i thought about all my choices but knew in the ned i wanted that baby more then anything even though i was scared silly. I got the glares and looks to, and the ever so popular "your to young" lecture, but in the end it was my desicion and choice and would be my responsibility. i kept my lil girl, shes been heaven sent, i love her to bits, things have a way of working out when you least expect them to. as in any advice, i would say buy WHATEVER you can as you go along, diapers,blankets,unisex clothes, anything you will need, its so much easier to have everything early then not be prepared. good luck and you will see things work out and they are meant to be, theres a larger plan out there for all of us, we just dont see it yet.  

Answer 5

I would definitely wait for college, even though it's important.. nothing beats a life.

I agree with all the answers before mine (and not because I want best answer points). Everybody that I've talked to that has had a baby young instead of an abortion says it was the best decision they ever made. Somebody told me that her daughter was the best mistake that's ever happened to her.

SO PLEASE, keep your baby. It makes me want to cry when I think of either anybody I know, my friends, or even myself - if our mothers would have gotten an abortion. I would have never known the great person I know today.

Answer 6

I am also 18 and I'm 19 weeks pregnant. I strongly advise you NOT to take any time off of college if you decide to keep this baby. The chances of you ever going back are very slim, and it's empowering to see a young woman to take the initiative in such a hard time of her life. Instead, is it a possibility to transfer into a different college? Personally, I wouldn't tolerate a school that would look down upon my situation. The school you have chosen is a Christian institution and they are choosing to look down on a young woman that decided to KEEP her baby instead of abort? This school has it priorities mixed up!

As for abortion, that is soley your decision and should be thought upon very carefully as it has the ability to affect your life for the rest of it (as does having this baby!). Sit down and find out what is most important for you--going to college without being pregnant? Taking a year off and running the risk of never getting your education but keeping your baby? Or keeping your baby, getting an education, and going to a different college (albeit a harder path at first with the demands of school and pregnancy/a child)?

As I am in a very similar situation as you, I am going to college next fall and hopefully, if all goes well during the delivery in early january, I can return before Christmas break is over. My mother went through the same thing in her years in college (but she had 2 babies while in school) and she is my inspiration. I've read about a lot of young women choosing to stay home instead of go to college, but they never decide to go back. If you decide to take school off for a year, you will have to be very strong-willed in order to start college afterward.

Good luck and do whatever you feel is best for you and your life right now!

Answer 7

I am 18 and also 10 weeks pregnant. I have decided to put off college for a year.

Answer 8

i cant tell you what to do but ill tell you my situation.

i was 21 when i had my son and i love him to death and would do anything for him but i wasnt able to finish college because you just get so caught put in being a mother. it was really hard even though my boyfriend was there for me the whole time and worked two jobs so that i could stay home with the baby.

i wish i would of waited to have him so that i could of finished school. im 23 now and just know going back to school.

its all up to you and what you know that you are capable of.

good luck because its a very big decision

Answer 9

well im 18 prego and in college. im keeping my baby

Answer 10

i would keep the baby. i would never kill an innocent child because it interfered with what i wanted to do.  

Answer 11

unfortately, I would put college off just for a bit.  Dont have an abortion.  You will regret it and you need to ask yourself if you could live with yourself if you were to abort.  You can still go to college, just not when you want anymore

Answer 12

im 18 and found out i was pregnant this summer.. i thought my mom would be supportive since she had me at 17.. but she wasnt at all.. she sent me to my grandparents and told me i ***** come back until after i take care of it. i wanted to keep it at first because i used to consider myself against abortion.. but i had no support.. my grandparents were only letting me stay there temporarily until i got the procedure done.. and my dad wasnt talking to me. My (now ex) boyfriend and his family were all drug addicts so i didnt want to live with them. i had no where to go and had never felt so alone.

my family went about it all wrong.. but i know i made the right choice in getting an abortion. whatever you end up doing will be the right choice for you.. know that!!

Answer 13

I'm 17 and have a 7 month old. Me and his father are still together.

I think that if you're ready for the baby you should have it. As far as your schools no tolerence, your own flesh and blood is a lot more important than their stupid rule. I'm going to be going to University too. You can do it if you want it bad enough.

Good luck with your decision.

Answer 14

I am not in this situation, but my sister was, at 17 years old. She had to try to make the decision to keep the baby, get an abortion, or put the baby up for adoption.  We are a pretty religious family, so it tore us up because while no one was in favor of abortion, it was also a huge undertaking for her to have the baby (on our whole family since she was so young!)

She kept the baby and it was the best thing that ever happened to her and our family.  That baby is now almost 13 years old and I couldn't imagine my world without her, and she change my sisters life (for the better).  It is VERY hard to have a baby, but you can do it! You can still do college - take courses online, and if the father is supportive, maybe you can even do classes at a local community college while he watches the baby for you.  

Answer 15

I got pregnant at 17 and I was 18  before my baby was born, but I wanted to go ito the air force after high school. I knew that they wouldn't accept me into basic training at 9 months pregnant. So I told my recruiter that I wanted to take a year off and have some fun before going into such a strict environment. He said that was a good idea.

So I have my baby but I didn't keep her. I gave her up for adoption. That was a very hard thing to do but I knew it was the best thing for her because I was too young to care for her and I definately wouldn't be able to carry around a baby while climbing walls and 4 am P.T. I knew it was the best thing to do to make her future brighter and to ensure that I can secure a future for myself and any babies I decided to have in the future.

The only difference between you and I is I didn't have a stable relationship. The father ran like a scared little boy the second I mentioned being late. That is basically what sealed my decision. I knew I couldn't raise a baby making minimum wge flipping burgers at Mickey D's the rest of my life.

I know that my baby is doing great because I elected for an open adoption, which I got to choose which family I thought she would thrive best in. The couple sends me pictures and she even writes my letters every few months.

Everything worked out for all of us. She is a healthy, happy, and very well-cared-for 11-year-old. I am now a proud mother of 4 that I can care for and I am very happy with the decision I made.

Whatever you decide to do make sure you factor in how it will affect your baby, because that is the most important thing in the situation.

Good luck with your decision. I know you will do what you feel is best for everyone involved.