I am 7 months unwed pregnant mom. What happens if my EX wants to share custody of the baby and I don't? ?

Question

He didn't want the baby in the beginning. He even suggested to have it aborted and now out of the blue he came back telling me he wants to be involved with the baby's life and want to share custody as well. I just think it's unfair and how convenient for him to just have a change of heart and things will be easy for him.

Answer 1

you should be happy that he has had a change of heart,your child will deserve to have both of his/her parents in its life.  Even if you feel that it is unfair you should let him in the childs life, because it is unfair to your child for you to try and keep its father away.

Answer 2

Your best bet would be trying to find a attorney and seeing what he/she says. I wouldnt go by "good word" from the ex. It dosent sound good. If he were to try to take full custody of the baby, everything that was said between you (about the abortion, etc...) is just he said, she said bullcrap. You may not have much of a choice about sharing custody, unless you can prove him unfit. But I would lawyer up before he does. Good Luck!~     EDIT:  I didnt have a father in my life and is would be better if the child did. Just be cautious in doing so.

Answer 3

If you don't agree to it then you can fight it and just stick to him only getting visitations.  Unless you two can get along really shared parenting and joint custody doesn't work.  I would talk to a lawyer now about your options and find out how the courts usually work in your area.  Here in this county of Ohio they won't grant shared parenting or joint custody unless the parents live no more than 1 hour from each other and can prove they can communicate in a civil way and get along for the sake of the kids.  If there is any problems seen they won't do the joint because they said it just wouldn't work out anyways.  

Answer 4

well give him a chancce and maybe u guys can be  afmialy

Answer 5

I think you should cautiously let him back in, as bad as he may have been in the beginning, it looks like he realizes how important it is for him to be in his child's life, and it is important that the child have a father (unless of course there is come type of abuse going on)

Answer 6

I don't know what his intentions are. It would be convenient for your child to have a father. Focus on having the baby and work out custody later. If you don't want him around, then you're going to need a parenting plan and a restraining order along with visitation without you present. Hope it all goes well all the same.

Answer 7

He has a right to the baby to. If you didn't want him to end up being able to go for custody you shouldn't have gotten pregnant.

Answer 8

It's his baby too.  Don't punish the baby by keeping him away from his father, just because you are upset with how he reacted to the pregnancy at first.  He wants to be a part of the baby's life, and that's a good thing.

Shared custody might not be the best idea, but maybe you could suggest a generous visitation schedule.  

Answer 9

the only thing i know of (its kinda cruel and i don't know the situation) DON'T PUT HIS NAME ON THE BIRTH CERTIFACTE!!! Instead, put unknown!! i've had a friend that did this b/c he started doing drugs!! not sure if it's the route u wanna take but....... good luck

Answer 10

well it is his baby too. and yes maybe he did have a change of heart, don't you want your baby to have it's father in it's life? I think you're being selfish. I understand that you have anger when he didn't want it in the beginning, but he does now. maybe he thought about it a lot. not trying to be rude. but a lot of kids don't have dad's. not only that but he can take you to court and most judge's favor for the child to have both parents. unless you can prove that he will be an unfit father.

Answer 11

You know people mess up give the man a chance to be a father for his child.  If he wants to be let him.  Stop thinking about your own feelings and think about your child.  If he wants to be there let him.

Answer 12

if the has not been there for you then s***w him

if it gets bad and you have to go to court over it i think you will be fine. what judge would let someone have custody when he didn't wanna be there in the first place. who knows maybe he will disappear for another 7 months! good luck hun!

Answer 13

Take him to court.. Get a good lawyer if possible. Fight it. My ex did the same exact c**p. Didn't bother wit me my entire pregnancy, had another woman pregnant at the same time, decided he wanted to be involved the day before I had my son.. now I'm on what seems to be a never endin' roller coaster ride. Just fight and fight hard because it isn't fair and I'm sure u didn't get an ounce of help wit ne help durin' ur pregnancy from him wit ne of the babies stuff. They only seem to want to save cash 'n use children as a piggy bank.