I am a 14 year old soon to be father and i need answers?

Question

i made a mistake by thinking i was ready to have s*x and now i am faced with so many complications and problems that i dont know how to fix. But i do have a great understanding mom who is behind me 100% and i am very much in love with the girl i had s*x with and we both want to keep the baby. The only thing is we dont know how. Can someone give me advice?

Answer 1

That is great that you are standing behind your girlfriend many boys would just walk away.. Your girlfriend can check into medicaid for pregnant women and WIC that will help with medical bills and formula expense.  Your girlfriend and you need to sit down with both sets of parents and discuss arrangements. To keep your baby is the decision of your girlfriend ultimately but her parents can influence her decision. Unfortunately dad's don't get a whole lot of say in this situation.

The only advice is take things one day at a time, communicate with eachother and your parents. You both are too young for jobs so you will need your parent's support.  You both need to show some responsibility to them.

good luck

Answer 2

well first off, every pregnancy deserves a CONGRATULATIONS even if it was a big mistake.  And it is also good that you did not run away from the situation.  Many boys your age leave the mom to care for the baby.  It is also good that the girl was not just someone you wanted to have s*x with just because you wanted to get the s*x thing over with.  My best advice is to go with the flow.  Ask your mom for advice and make sure to stay in the babies life.  I'm sure you will make a great dad.  And one more thing, maybe you shouldn't have s*x again until you are more of and adult, and if you do, use a condom.  Good luck, and don't worry, your mom will be there to help you the whole way.

Answer 3

what in the h**l were you doing having s*x at the age of fourteen. your worse than jamie lynn. god it deturmens on if you make a decent living for you child. lmao, s*x at fourteen. your messed up. you should have at lease used condoms or control pills

Answer 4

Being a father at your age would be very difficult and challenging, a well as very time consuming. It depends how old your girlfriend is, and you should have a very serious talk with her about it. Having a baby would be much harder for her than for you, and if you want to keep it, why not consider Ziggy for a name?

Answer 5

WELL I THINK THAT YOU REALLY SHOULD GET DONE WITH SKOOL FIRST BUT I THINK HAVING A BABY IS REALLY NICE CAUSE IM HAVEING ONE AND IM SO HAPPY BOUT IT AND IF YOU PARENTS IS WILLING TOO HELP THEN MAYBE YOU JUST MIGHT BE A GREAT FATHER AND IF YOU LOVE THE GIRL MAYBE YOU GUYS SHOULD HAVE A FAMILY BUT YOUR STILL 14 THEREES MY EMAIL WRITE ME SOMETIMES MY EMIAL IS [e-mail]

Answer 6

give up the baby to foster care. its not fair to the kid  to raise a child at 14.

Answer 7

Until you are physically ready have one of your parents or hers take care of it until you are old enough to work and such.  Make sure you finish your education.

Answer 8

It'll be hard.... Just love the kid. And your going to need the support.....

Answer 9

first off, it was very brave of you to share your feelings and to accept the responsibility of your actions. it's going to get much harder to stay around because you'll realize that you aren't the one who's carrying around a child. you need to make a committment to yourself that you'll follow through on your word. i hope you've both told your parents. all i can truly offer is to be someone to talk to when you need it. it's always good to have someone to count on. please message me and we can keep talking that way. i'm sorry you put yourself in this situation but i am 100% willing to help you both out. i'm a very good listener. i also have a facebook group called "dear steph:" that you can join and i can talk through that as well. i'll be praying for you both. let me know if there's anything i can do. you sound very mature for your age and i'm very proud of the decision you've made.

steph

Answer 10

omg wow well... hmm

Answer 11

I was a mom at 13. I am now a mom of 2 kids a 1 and 1/2 year old boy and a 1 month old daughter.  I know a lot about parenting. If you need any help or support beyond this question I am willing to help you.  Email me if you need support or anything like parenting tips.

Answer 12

I assume that your mother knows about the pregnancy?  What about her parents?  When you say "keep the baby," do you mean letting the baby be born or do you mean raising the baby yourselves?

I recommend that you provide a lot more information about what your parents and family are saying.

Answer 13

dude--

s'okay, what you need to do is if the child is at your house, you need to be the one taking care of it. not your mom!!!! always be understanding even with your mother, and RESPECT her, bc she's so understanding and all. stock up on diapers and all, learn to cut coupons, ect. you're in a bit deep, but i'm sure your parents gf will help you through it. but you have to be willing to take advice.

shes' lucky she found you, somebody willing to stick to her. don't stray away.....

Answer 14

Do what Juno did...

give the baby up for adoption and keep in touch with the parents your giving the baby to. Tell them to send you pictures, keep you in touch with everything, and all that stuff.

You're way too young brah.

Answer 15

you are going to have a long road ahead of you. I had a baby at 14 but the father wasnt around. the best thing you can do is be there for her and your baby.

Answer 16

wow a baby at 14...not i even im that crazii...lol

but yea at least you ♥ your gf && your mom can help you with this...better than what most people get you know?

well you can get help from planned parenthood && you might wanna find some kind of job that can help support your new family some.even you you only make 200 or so....its something aint it?:]]

also you migth wanna buy some baby supplies like clothes,a crib,some toys just so when the time comes your baby is ready to move in.

remenber also you need to feed,change, && keep a good eye for the baby...dont leave your gf to do all the work.itll make her feel like you dont care.

if you need anymore help on anything add me yahoo messenger or message me...id be glad to help my friend has a baby && shes 14 so i know what your going through.♥

congrats && good luck

andrea--

Answer 17

well is your mom is very supportive you will probably be able to get a lot of help from her, if you girlfriends parents are supportive you will probably have some kind of help from them, but you 2 need to take care of the baby as much as possible because it is your responsibility

Answer 18

You are doing the right thing for staying by her. You need to get a job and work HARD at your schoolwork so you can have some sort of a future for the kid.

This will get u money and help u succeed, try tudoring, teaching kids at ur own grade level will help u brush up on stuff and you will be helping someone else and get a couple bucks.

You could try volunteering at a daycare center or a veternarian clinic.

Answer 19

Your so brave.

I am 13, and pregnant.

The father is behind me 100%.

We haven't told our parents yet.

Just be there for her. It's what we need.

Can I ask, how did you tell your parents, because I'm afraid too?

Answer 20

You need to give up the child to someone else. Neither of you are ready for this. You need to be able to live your lives and not be raising a child. Yes you have made a dire mistake but, this is the best solution for your situation. You can arrange things so that you can be allowed to see the baby even though it is in foster care so you won't totally be out of the child's life but, seriously. Adoption is your best option.

Answer 21

good luck

Answer 22

Don't now how what?

Good on you for not abandoning the girl and sticking with her, you're the type of guy worth having!

Well you should probably get a job, and encourage your girlfriend to get one too. You'll need all the money you can get when this baby comes along.

Stay together and show all those people that could and will judge you that it doesn't matter your age. You're doing the best for yourselves and the baby. Be there for your girlfriend. She'll have a rougher time than you, what with having a huge bump to carry around. She'll get stairs, disapproving looks and no doubt harsh comments. So that's not going to be easy for her. That's why you need to be there for her.

Most of all be excited about this new baby you've got coming along. Go to scans, feel him/her kicking, take pictures and when the baby comes enjoy every minute of fatherhood.

I wish you, your girlfriend and the baby all the best! Enjoy!

Answer 23

You will be fine. You are not the first 14 yr old to be in this situation or the last. Don't listen to people with negative comments. I applaud your mom for being their for you. Be there for your child and the mother. And finish your education. Times are rough and are getting rough. There is help out there. Tell your girl to apply for WIC and She is eligible for medicaid because she is pregnant. There is programs that help with getting baby items. I wish you the best and think positive. This is not the end of the world thou it might seem. You will be alright and this will definitely make you grow up.

Answer 24

if your mother is 100% behind you then follow her advice . dont depend on her or your gf parents to raise the child , that your 2 responsiblitly . just get ready for the  middle of the night wake of feedings , you 2 can switch doing that if the little one is bottle fed . just do the best you can and everything will work out . good luck !!

Answer 25

WOW!!!!

you better NOT have an abortion, that's all I can say.

You got yourself in this mess now it's time for you to GROW the h**l up and raie this baby or put it up for adoption.

Don't kill the baby. IT IS MURDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(if this is true)

Why were you having s*x at 14 anyways, don't you have something better to do. s*x is for mature people. and all you are is a little kid. How old is your girlfriend??

Why are there so many 14 y/o's  pregnant?

I'm starting to not believe all this stuff.

Answer 26

Did you guys @ least tell both parents?? Now, your fourteen, you are NOT ready for a kid and neither is she. You need to tell your parents and then get her an abortion or have then kid and give it up for adoption. I wonder what was going through your heads?? Actually, I don't wanna know. I understand you and her have something special but your fourteen, you don't know if your gonna marry this girl in the future or not. and if you haven't told your parents then prepare for a whole lotta ugly comin' at you.

Answer 27

omg your 14 & having a baby WOW. well atleast it's with the girl you love and not with a complete person you didn't want to be with. and atleast you guys want to keep the baby and your mom is 100% behind you thats like three steps up from everyone else. but it's not that hard supporting a baby i mean yeahh money is going to be the biggest problem but i mean it's not that hard. all you really have to do is feed it burp it after dress it change it and basically put it to sleep. not that hard right??  i wish the best for you and your girlfriend and your baby.

if you need any advice on how to do anything dealing with the baby let me know =)

Answer 28

watch baby shows ask ur mom with a baby u have to be ready they eat sleep pee in p**p like we do they cry it upsets u cause u dont know whats wronge its too young to talk to tell u its needs be a man in do ur best be there 100% u not to young to get a job kroger u have to be 14 yrs old be a paper boy help out the older people they love to pay take care good luck ...... ur pal Shar!

Answer 29

Well its amazing to see that you are going to be able to keep the baby. If your mom is 100% behind you then she can help you out right? i don't know exactly what you are asking if you mean by supporting you baby and girl then i would suggest you try to get a job since you are so young then you should try to get one as mowing lawns,clean ups. Check out Craig's list or post something on an add saying you want to work as ...... and people from there would7ld call you. A paper rout would do too. I'm glad to see that there are people out there that deal with there actions. It wont be easy at all but not impossible and thanks to your mom that you Will be much better off!!  Good luck and i wish the best to both of you and your new baby ;)

Answer 30

The first thing you should do is see a lawyer and have him draw up a legal agreement about who is responsible for what and for how long.  A family law attorney can advise you.  This is for everyone's protection, especially the baby's.

You're not the first to be a father at 14, of course.  You might find the profile page below useful and encouraging. Matt was also a father at 14, raising his little girl by himself (with the help of family, of course).

No other advice here, just prayers that it all works out, for all of you.

Answer 31

well you arent old enough to work. i sugest go to your local health department and get some resorces. But you number one help is both your parents listen to them they will be the biggest help