I am at my wits end...Does someone have some good advice?

Question

My 5 year old will not eat what I fix for breakfast lunch or dinner....I don't allow him to eat any junk at all...but that for some reason is what he wants...We practically force him (not physically) to eat a few bites here and there just so he'll have something in him...We tell him he has to go to bed if he doesn't eat some dinner...He only had candy at Halloween and Easter before he started preschool last year and they gave him a piece of candy everyday...He isn't growing....He was getting dressed the other day with his back to me and I could see every rib...I'm so worried about him....What can I do?

Answer 1

i think you need to take him into the doc to be evaluated.

But he needs to eat food. some kids go through a faze where they dont eat that much, but not to the point of losing weight that badly.

If he is hungry, he should eat on his own. maybe ask him what he wants for breakfast, lunch and get him to help you prepare it...supper, well thats what you make and everyone eats..

Answer 2

Stop trying to force him to eat.  If he won't eat, simply excuse him from the table with a warning that he won't have anything else to eat until the next meal.  Then follow through.  No snacks of any kind even if they are healthy.  Children get into the habit of not eating meals thinking they will get a snack later so they really don't have to eat their meals.  If he doesn't eat dinner allow him to get up from the table but no snacks before bed.  He isn't going to starve to death if he misses a couple of meals and he will know that he does not determine mealtime but you do.  Also, fried chicken isn't all that healthy, especially the "crunchies" and ribs aren't that great either since what makes them flavorful is the fat.

Answer 3

What does he WANT to eat? Think high calorie meals...

Put Instant Breakfast mix in his milk.

Make lots of mac and cheese and potatoes.

Make smoothies in your blender.

Feed him food he likes. Does he like spaghetti? Make it. Beans and weenies? Great. Make it.

And if he eats well, give him a cup of ice cream for dessert. Sounds like he could use the calories and a little ice cream won't hurt the boy.

Answer 4

Although I agree junk food should be avoided as much as possible, you can't completely control what your child eats or you will make food a bigger issue than it should be.  It's important to give kids choices and teach them to make healthy ones.  Try talking to him about why his body needs protein, veggies, fruit and water. Boys love to know how things work.  Let him have something sweet as a reward for eating a good dinner.    I promise you when he is 16 he won't refuse to eat unless he gets a cookie - he will be eating you out of house and home. :o)

Answer 5

Ask the teacher to not give out candy, because I honestly do not believe in that. Only fix him healthy things, and tell him he has to eat a majority of it. Maybe make a deal with him, if he eats a decent amount of food he can have 1 piece of candy - you don't need to completely cut him off, once a day isn't a lot, and as long as he gets other nutrients then at that age he will burn it right off.  

Answer 6

Make a deal with him. For every two things that he likes to eat and eats he has to have one of several choices of food that you select for him. If he refuses tell him that you are going to send him to Mr. Smith in Maine. Thats what my folks told me. I never found out who Mr. Smith in Maine was because my folks never sent me.

Answer 7

If he is that small, he needs to be seen by a doctor.  As far as him eating...between ages 5 and 6 is when their taste buds change.  It's not unusual for him to be a little pickier than he used to be...but to flat out refuse to eat at all...there might be a medical problem.  I would have him checked out.

Answer 8

I wish I could help you, my parents didn't have that problem with me. I'd eat anything not nailed down and sometimes some of those too..:) Hopefully, it's just a phase he is going through. If he gets too bad you probably do need to take him to a doctor.  

Answer 9

At 5, kids are looking for control. Right now he can't control a lot of things in his life, but one thing he CAN control is what he puts in his body. Try giving him choices at mealtimes. Instead of preparing breakfast and trying to make him eat it (he will only struggle for that control) offer him a menu of sorts. Say, "ok, today for breakfast you can have cereal, eggs, or waffles. Which one do you want?" That way, he has control, he is choosing what he eats. But also, he is still eating foods that you approve of. Also, talk to your doctor about your concerns with his weight loss. It could be that he is growing faster than he is gaining weight (especially if he is not eating regularly). Your pediatrician will be able to look at his records and spot troublesome weight loss patterns.  Use treats as a reward after he eats healthy meals, that might encourage him to finish. Instead of saying "no sweets!" make a compromise: "you can have ice cream for dessert, but you have to eat your dinner."  Again, this gives him control, and he will see real consequences for not eating.  And "junk" can be healthy, like frozen yogurt instead of ice cream, or even popsicles which are mostly just water.  He won't know the difference. Good luck! Hope that helps.

Answer 10

my first instinct is to tell you that he'll eat when he is hungry. But if you can see every rib I would definitely speak to a doctor and then maybe think about a child psychologist! There is an underlying reason for his not wanting to eat, whether it be attention or control or just plain non hunger...but if he is losing weight then it also has become a medical problem. Id talk to your pediatrician first thing!

Answer 11

So sorry for your concerns. Mine is 5 also and eats like a horse but is very small and I see his ribs. I go back to the doc and am told - he is small - like me and eats well, there is nothing they can do as he is not deemed underweight or height - just on the low side of those.

I know how you worry.