I am having a huge problem w/ my 2 yr old daughter on disipline.?

Question

My daughter is 2 yrs old and the stubbornist, prissiest thing I have ever seen in my life. She wants it her way or the highway. My husband says that she runs me. Its just so different b/c my son was never difficult until just recently @ 6. She throws tantrums @ the drop of a hat if she cant have what she wants. We are emmbarrassed to even take her out to eat or in public b/c we don't want the confrintation of her attitude. She tells me no, or screams at me if I dont give her her way, she will fall out in the floor. The littlest thing can be the biggest challange like putting on her coat! She will fight me tooth and nail about not wearing it until half the time I give up. She definatly knows how to quickly make us lose our cool and I have noticed how fast I lose my patience w/ my children now. I dont want to be this type of mother, please help me! She is a sweet child for the most part.

Answer 1

You need to first make sure she sees that you have complete respect from your six year old.  Then you to make it apparent that no matter what it is what going to happen when you say something to her.  If you say to her go get your coat, if she says no.  You say it again, she follows with no again, you say go get your coat right now or we will not go to the park or swimming pool or whatever was the original reason. Or if she does not want to do something you told her to do you make sure she knows you will not give up.  She needs to know you are mom and mom rules all.  I don't know if you watch supper Nanny but a naughty spot is what works for my family.  We use it religiously with my sisters.  My sister is 4.  If you watch Super Nanny you will see that she says that you worn the child of something bad by saying next time you will go to the naughty sot, next time she does it you put her on the designated naughty spot tell her why and leave her there for 2 minutes because she is two.  If she gets up say nothing to her grab her by her arm and put her back on the spot and do this till her time is up when done make sure she knows what she did wrong.  You should probably watch Super Nanny.  Good Luck!!

Answer 2

You have to learn to ignore it and make it seem as if she is getting her way. Just say both no and ok calmly. Swat down to her level and talk to her softly and sweet. She is only two and you only want this to be a stage not a long term habit.

Answer 3

There is nothing wrong with your child. She's two ,come on you can't expect her to act like she is grown. Being a parent is not about having the perfect child it is about being the best example for that child to mold themselves after. She will eventually calm down when she gets older. If you think you can't handle it maybe you should go to parenting classes. Try to take a break from her let your husband watch or get a baby sitter for an hour or two.

Answer 4

If you don't want to be that type of mother then STOP being that type of mother.  YOU have allowed her to find out how to push your buttons and she has you very well trained.  She has control of all situations becuase YOU handed her that control.  If she throws fits in public don't take her out in public, leave her with a sitter.  Tell her that if she can't behave properly she can't go places with you.  Start putting her in time out, or purchase a child gate, put it in the doorway of her bedroom and when she starts throwing tantrums put her in her room and walk away.  Ignore the falling on the floor etc.  She does it because she knows she can get her way.  You have to learn how to acknowledge the good behavior with praise and privleges and ignore the bad behavior.

Answer 5

Your daughter sounds like she is in charge and running the household I'm afraid.   You and your husband are afraid to take her out in public because of her attitude problem.    You and your family are missing out on a lot of family outings because of this child.   The best bet, if she continues this is just to pick her up (even if she is fighting you) with out a word and remove her from the store or situation.   You have to somehow 'outwit' her because she's playing you and winning. She's two - hopefully she'll grow out of the "terrible twos"

Answer 6

For me in reading that it was the words, "...half the time I give up...", meaning you give IN. Don't give in and don't give up.

I put my kids in the time-out spot when they tantrum...and leave them there. They will not get what they want by throwing a tantrum...ever.

-Be consistent and be firm

-Give choices- but stick to 2 and only those 2.

-Follow through.

-After time out talk to your daughter about what happened and what she needs to do differently.

-Get a timer and set it for 2 minutes- she is not to move for 2 minutes.

Our son has autism and once threw outrageous tantrums...all of the above worked very well to quell them.

Good luck!

Answer 7

At 2 she is starting to push that first boundary. If she throws a tantrum while you are out just walk away from her. The shock of seeing you ignoring her will make her forget the tantrum. At home put her in time out. If you have a portable cot set that up as a time out area. She can't get out and she can't hurt herself. If you make it clear to her that you will not accept that type of behaviour she will soon stop.

It is hard but well worth it when she grows up knowing her parents have set boundaries for her.

Answer 8

spank her SAY IF YOU HAVE A TT I WILL PULL DOWN YOUR PANTS AND SPANK YOUR ***" THEN PULL HER PANTS  DOWN AND SPANK HER ***. THEN SAY YOUR DAD WILL DEAL WITH YOU IF THERE IS TROBLE AGAIN WITH A SPANK. if she does not stop threat her. I WILL PUT A DIAPER ON YOU" SINCE YOUR TWO STILL, TERRIBLE TWOS. bad age but cute

Answer 9

what stopped my bro, im kinda quiet, was that when he bit or scratched or w/e, my mom would put him in the closet until he would stfu.

Answer 10

Next time she does it laugh at her,and tell her to do it again. when i was younger my mother laughed at me and I never did it again. Trust me...it will work most of the time. Time-outs might also help you in this situation.

Answer 11

My 6 year old was like thatYou know what i did when she fell on the floor in the video store Ignore her when she saw i wasent reacting she got up. Hang in there my 6 year old may not throw tantrums any more but she mouths off like a p*****n and refuses to do anything she is told. We seem to fight as if she were a teenager.

Answer 12

i cant give advice because mine started like this at 2 and is still a handful at 5.she is a lot better but i do believe kids are born with a certain type of personality.we can go out for meals now but i still dont like to take her shopping.i think i was too soft but i do think she would of still been strong minded if id of been tuffer.they are soooo adorable arent they.lol

Answer 13

It's the terrible 2's. Just a phase. It will pass soon. For now you have to learn how to deal with it as best you can.

Answer 14

you should know that she has figured you out. she has found out a way (obviously a highway, as you've mentioned) to get anything she wants from you by throwing tantrums. she knows you would be embarassed and give her what she wants once she starts screaming. Its normal, all kids think that way. the best way to deal with this is  keep your head cool and let her go on with the tantrums. I know its hard especially when you're in public places. when this happens all u gotta do is act like you dont care and keep walking or doing whatever you're doing without paying any attention to her. she'll catch up with you immediately. let her know that she is not the one to control you and her way doesnt work on you anymore. She'll learn. good luck.

Answer 15

Well, im no expert, but what really taught me, was when my parents took something special away from me, or ignored me. they would literally stick me in a closet until i shut up. i learned from that. also, what works, is just tell her how rude, disrespectful, and mean she is being. (ok, well this only works with us older kids, but still.) and whatever you do, don't lose your cool. for me, yelling gave me nightmares. i hated it. i guess you may use it though. yes, in the end i guess it probably was helpful. but, make sure that your yelling is specifially aimed at your daughter, and that is to her. yelling at god or jesus is no help. if your daughter starts crying, use the closet techinque. only use walk-in closets, however. as a final note, keep in mind that i am only 12, i can only tell you my experiences as a "terrible two", and that i am most definitley NOT a parenting expert. good luck though!