I am in Judo and Aikido my instructor is an army major. We was sparring or doing rondorie and he had me in?

Question

an armbar I couldn't get out of it and was trying very hard. He slapped me on my *** and stated get mad and you'll get out of it. I came out cussing and almost walked out. His girlfriend was standing their laughing and watching, and she did nothing. Four weeks prior to that he came up with a dill that he wanted me to move in at the dojo I told him no. His girlfriend stands their and does nothing but laughes. I am the only girl their besides his girlfriend, and he wants me to go for my blackbelt and not get paid to teach his class. What should I do should I stay in it till I get my green or brown belt or should I just quit? He wants me to compete to and I don't want to. Whats your advice about the situation?

Answer 1

If he continues to harass you tell him that the whole reason you started doing martial arts is to protect yourself from a## holes like himself, and if he continues to harass you you will either quit (preferable if he does something relatively tame) or call the police.

Answer 2

I say you should get out and go to another judo aikido club, you should get to keep your rank. Then you should get really good and go back and belt him and his girlfriend. It is wrong of him to put you into such a position.

It's harassment.

Answer 3

Leave immedietly and find another school and instructor. there is no way in any shape or form that he should have slapped your behind. Yes accidents can happen in training, and do, but any smart person knows the difference between and accident and an "accident" which it seems like he did not even pretend it was an accident. the "deal' he preposed was also out of line.

I would actually take it  astep further and contact the local authorities or at the very least the BBB in your area. Chances are if he is going to do it to you he will probably do it to somebody else down the road, and that has no business in a martial arts school.

We have had people who have had "accidents" at our school before, and I can garuntee you it only happens once.

Answer 4

Keep with it, if you enjoy the art that much. He may just have did that to try to get you mad, when anger kicks in, so does your adriniline, it does show you what you are capable of, some women have been known to lift cars to get there children out from underneath them.

Have a talk with him, tell him you would really like to proceed with training, that you enjoy it, but tell him that you do not have feelings for him that way, tell him that you want to be treated as one of the "guys", not seperate or special. Tell him that it really bothers you when he does stuff like that. If he is honorable then he will stop.

Also, if someone offered me to move in, h**l ya, I would jump on it, as long as its a fair deal, if he is not singling you out or doing it because he expects anything extra of you.

If it was a one time thing, then I would say let it go, it might have been one of those things to get your adriniline up, but then I could be wronge. Some of the time girls do make a lot of things guys don't really think matters to much, in the locker room guys snap eachother with towels, ect, its just goofing off to us, but if it does persist, why not try to find another school?

He wont dare try to hold you to contract if you offer to slap him with a sexual harassmeant, more then once, thats a d**n big law suit. You could take him to the bank for that one there. Its up to do you though. if I was a girl, I would talk to him, if it happens again, I would seek different training, tell him I am leaving and I will not hold up to the contact, hecause he knows why. If you trys to do anything about it, take him to court, simple as that.