I am in assisted living, and my roommate doesn't like me, but they won't let me swap rooms. what can i do?

Question

hi. i am 19 yrs old and i live in an assisted living home. my roommate, howard, is an older man, about 60 or so, and he really doesn't like me. that doesn't really bother me, and i just mind my own business, but lately he really makes me uncomfortable.

he calls me names, and talks bad about me because he hates all young people. then if i just try to ignore him, he will usually get mad and say i've got no right to treat him that way because he went to war.

howard is scizophrenic (sorry if i spelled that wrong) and i understand that he's not too mentally stable, and i try not too take anything he says too personally, but it's really starting to get to me.

and the last couple of nights when i was taking a bath in the bathroom i swear i can hear him like leaning against the door, and it really worries me cause we're not allowed locks on the doors here.

at night he talks to himself, and sometimes paces around the room cursing and its really scary and i havent really been able to sleep lately.

i talked to one of the nurses today, and told her that i'm not comfortable rooming with howard, and asked if i could swap room with someone else. she said that i cant swap now and that howard and me will just have to try to get along for awhile longer.

i dont think that they are taking me seriously because a few days ago when the nurse came to the room, he mentioned something about me being a loud teenager. i know i'm not loud because i hardly ever even talk to him unless he talks to me first, and i dont do anything else the least bit noisy. i just sit around and draw if in not on the computer in the commonroom.

i dont want to be a bother to anybody because i recently had to swap rooms not too long ago and i dont want them to think im complaining for a not good reason.

any advice for me?

thank you.

Answer 1

Why are you in assisted living you're only 19? Get a notebook and write down everything he does and when he does it after a couple days show it to the nurse and see what she says, if the answers no, tough it out awhile.

Answer 2

Hey

I recently did a brief study on schizophrenia, and even we did an experiment where we were schizophrenic for a day (all thanks to recorded thoughts and mp3 players)

I was extremely angry, frustrated and sad - that was only for 3 hours!! I can't imagine what it would be like for life.  Its really hard, and it wasn't even real...

I guess you can trace this anger to his mental condition.  If you just keep to yourself and try to accept his condition it may be a bit better.

I don't really know how to help but that's all I can think of..

I hope stuff gets better :)

Answer 3

You need to go over the nurses heads. And you need to document everything he says and does to you. He is being abusive. Talk to the manger of the unit you are staying in. Put your request in writing and tell them if they don't change your room that you will call a lawyer. Time to stand up for yourself. Those nurses do not have the power to give you another room I'll bet. It's up to someone else in management. Make sure you let management know that you have asked to be removed for that room a long time ago. Write dates, times and names down everyday. Get out of there. Good luck and stand your ground.