I am just as shallow as the next guy!?

Question

That was just to grab your attention, but...

I hate the idea that men think women do not value looks on their man as much as men value women's looks. I do! Along with intelligence, veracity, education, etc etc...everything is just as important! I resent that men think this way...

Perhaps it is modern times, but I am attractive, educated and plan to have my own income. I look for a mate that matches ALL of these qualities, looks being one.

Is that why unattractive maintenance men think it's appropriate to hit on beautiful grad students half his age?

Answer 1

Well, Channy, all I can say is good luck on your checklist.

But the fact of the matter is the gender gap in education is there and it's getting wider. If you want all those things in a man, you should be more concerned with what YOU have to offer because education is not on most men's shortlist of attributes in what they look for in a woman. Also, in case you haven't noticed lately, men are less concerned with looks than ever before. Are you as shallow as the next guy? No, you're a little more shallow than the next guy.

CAustin - I am not here to chat with you. If you don't like my answer, provide one of your own. But I will say that some of the least intelligent people I've met hold a Master's.

Answer 2

Women (as a social group) don't offer enough to hold that kind of bargaining leverage. Sure, there are some women who are above the curve, yet women in general are so majorly valued only for their looks (mostly their own doing) that any one women going against this mold would be swimming upstream.

I mean look at the question asked here. The OP felt they had to create an ostensible 'man persona' just to even get attention to her question. I'm surprised why women just don't - look smart, be smart, act smart/ if they want to be considered smart. You see how often they resort to: complaining about it, demeaning men for not valuing them for their intellect, and operating under a guise- as we have here.

btw, I am attractive, educated and plan to have my own income as well--- and "why does that matter?"

Answer 3

You're right, you are very shallow.

And very stereotypical as well may I add.  

Answer 4

Sounds like this isnt a theoretical Q...and you been on it for a few days now.

Look getting hit on happens.  Getting hit on by guys who make your skin crawl happens....you have a choice ignore/brush it off, or let it bother you.

It's bugging you, and it's time to move on darlin.  

It's a free country they/he has the right to try, and you have the right to tell them to go on.

Answer 5

all the guys are dickheads haha  

Answer 6

I agree. It's always been something that rattles me too.

I've got another kicker for you. I'm full-figured. So it's practically a moral imperative that I don't care about what a guy looks like. Never mind that I present myself well (well-dressed and groomed) and have other attractive features (clear skin, pretty, healthy auburn hair, killer cheekbones and a nice hourglass shape). I'm supposed to be grateful if one of those ugly maintenance men hits on me! No thanks!

I could never discount a man's appearance. I'm not nearly shallow enough for that.

Answer 7

Why is it inappropriate to "hit on" somebody half your age?

Charlie Harper does it, and he's successful at it! (google charlie harper if you dont get the referance)

I'm sorry, but you seem to have an ego problem. Your saying that you find it offensive if a man who doesn't meet your standards asks you out?

You must need a 3 bedroom apartment for that ego.

Answer 8

If most highly-attractive women had to choose between a toned model-looking guy who made $35,000/year age 25-35 or a less-toned mediocre looking guy who made $300,000/year age 35-45, they'd choose the second.  Sociologists and Social Psychologists have done numerous research on this.

If you like hot guys, and you're under 24, let me know ;)

Answer 9

"...education is not on most men's shortlist of attributes in what they look for in a woman."

I have to comment on this quote made by another answerer: do you LIKE trying to have a decent conversation with someone who stares at you blankly if you talk about anything weightier than the latest celebrity romance scandal?  

A disregard for education in a partner can only result from either inexperience in dating (e.g. not having dated that person yet and realizing how frustrating it is), or an extreme ego problem where having someone 'inferior' around is more important than having a partner you can communicate with.