of my mom being overbearing, im sick of her negative comments and im sick of being told what to do.
She has her parental little fingers in every aspect of my life. School, work, friends, who, how much I text people, how much time I spend online, what I go do and who with, how late I stay out, all that good stuff.
But she takes it to extremes, like telling me when I go to bed and what time I should get up and then getting angry at me and punishing me if im not up by a certain time. Example: I didn't feel like updating the version of MSN that I have so she blocked me off myspace. Control freak much?
She is also very negative or has oh-so-lovely criticism on everything.
Like my hair, make-up, clothes, sun-glasses, nail polish, I have to hear her negative comments about that everyday, I am so sick of hearing her complain she thinks my sunglasses are too big or if she doesn't like the rips in my jeans, get over it already!Its not like I walk around looking like Whorezilla.
I look like your average, uber-prep. I like my look.
Oh and I can't forget the criticism. I play soccer. She can't just come to a game and tell me good job on the stuff I do well, nope, I have to hear her criticism. And my brothers field fairy comments, which BTFW aren't needed. She criticizes me on everything, yes serisously, I mean, everything, get the picture? She criticizes me on what I eat, what music I listen to, my friends. If it doesn't suit her, I have to hear about it, long discussions on why I actually like whatever it is and an even longer persuasion on why I should like someone or something different.
Now, as for being sick of being told what to do, im not talking about normal teen stuff. She is lenient on my curfew, I don't really have one. But she is always asking me to stop texting, its not like im going over the amount she alloted me. Im staying within that amount I was given. She is always asking me to take my iPod out of my ears. I love music and she and my brother rather have [negative,boring] discussions in the car than listen to the radio, therefore, I put my headphones in. She is always asking me to keep my bedroom door open and unlocked. I like my secludedness, I don't want to be bothered.
Lately, its even escalated to her telling me when to go to bed and when to get up. She wouldn't even allow me to hang out with friends if I didn't do so.
So what if I stay up to 4am and don't get up till 1pm. Thats not keeping her from living life, she can go do whatever she wants, im not stopping her. So what if I stay online late at night, big whoop its summer, I have nothing better to do. She has been blocking me off Myspace, Facebook, Yahoo, MSN, Google[wtf?] after 1am, so that way I won't have anything to do and she thinks ill go to bed. It doesn't work.
I know she is here to help me along in life and set rules and standards and whatnot to help me grow and become a good person. But there is a fine line between parenting and suffocation. I know it is her house, her rule. I know that if I don't like her rules I am free to leave and get my own place and make my own rules. Truth is I have semester of HS left, even after then I won't be financially stable enough to make it out on my own. My grandparents are paying for my first two years of college[didn't ask and am very grateful for] but if I were to move out they wouldn't pay. So im here for another two and a half years. I need my mom right now. I need her help. But what I don't need is her making negative comments to me all the time, I don't need her constant hurtful criticism and I don't need her dictating every part of my life.
I want some room.I want to make decisions for myself such as if I stay up all night during the summer, if I want to text my little heart out without going over, if I want to sit on Y!A like a lame-o for hours answering ppls question. If I go to a concert or not. If I go on vacation with them or not. If I play sports during the summer or not.I want to decide what time I go to bed and what time I wake up. I want her to back off and give me some space. I have friends who live the life I dream of, their parents give and trust and are open and give room and decision making abilities. They let them go out and experience life and don't have huge discussions on why and whatever.
My mom doesn't see the difference between if im out doing things that are bad or if im out doing something she wouldn't do. She doesn't quite grasp the concept that I am a different person than her and I don't agree with a lot she says and that she shouldn't force her "ways of life" upon me, that I need to find my own. I don't know how to get her to back off. The more I try to get her to back off the more she uses her Momzilla parental powers to squish me and oppress me. I feel as long as if I were to stay on top of chores, not go over on my cell phone or pay if I do go over and im not out doing things that could get me into trouble then the rest of my life should me mine to dictate and her negative comments wouldn't be a part of. I don't want to spend the next two and a half years giving into her and living "her way" and being unhappy because of it, yes I would be unhappy because of it.
I am 18 almost 19. I am a free-spirit, I don't like to be held back or not have control.
I need advice, I need lots of advice.
I need a solution.
I need stories from people who have a mom like mine.
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