I am so worried, i cant stop crying?

Question

i am absolutely terrified of having my 12 week scan tomorrow.

at the beginning of the year i had a missed miscarriage/blighted ovum and didnt know untill my scan and i am so scared it will happen again. i am seriously thinking of not going for it tomorrow. i know u all not doctors but i just need some words of comfort i think.

i thought i was mentally ready to go through another pregnancy after our loss but im guessing i never dealt with the grief at all.

thankyou x

Answer 1

You have to go!  If you didn't, you would be waiting even longer to find out that its probably much better news.  I know what a hard time you've had and how scared you must be right now.  I had a miscarriage in Feb. and it was devastating.  We are now 17 weeks 2 days again and going for our anatomy scan today to hopefully find out what we are having.  Please try and stay positive!  Keep us posted.....

Answer 2

I was scared of this, too. I didn't have a missed miscarriage, but I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks and was going in for a ten week scan on this pregnancy and had had some cramping and was so scared of getting there to find no heartbeat. I sat there and prayed and was all shaky and finally she did the scan and there was my little one dancing around, healthy as can be. I cried because I was so happy. You will get through this, just brace yourself, have support there with you and chances are you'll be seeing your beautiful little baby dancing and waving to you and you will feel so much relief. You can do this! Good luck!

Answer 3

I had a miscarriage about 5 months before I got pregnant again. I went to the doctor and there was no more heartbeat.  And I was so scared to go to the doctor for my 12 week scan when I got pregnant again. Scared to tears. But you have to go. When everything turned out fine during the scan, I actually cried out of relief! Just try to keep positive and go. I know it's hard, but this is the only way we can have a baby! I am sure everything is fine, and you will be walking on air after your appointment. Congrats and good luck!

Answer 4

Oh that's so sad! I can see why you'd be scared..but remember they do those scans to check on your baby and make sure everything is ok. Don't cancel it! Can you get someone to go with you? Sounds like you need the support!

Good luck! I hope everything is ok!

Answer 5

Its going to be hard.. but go to your scan otherwise you will live in fear.Get your husband, boyfriend, or maybe your mom or best friend to go with you as comfort. Remember being upset and causing yourself stress causes stress on the baby.  

Answer 6

I totally understand your fear. It's totally normal and natural to feel like this.

But what you have to remember is that the chances of everything being just fine are strongly in your favour. A blighted ovum is a random event. There is absolutely no reason at all to think it will happen again to you or that it has happened.

My best friend was in exactly the same position as you this Tuesday. She called me that evening, in tears. I was so scared for her, but they were tears of joy from where she'd seen her baby jumping around on the screen for the last 30 minutes!

The scan will be wonderful and such a happy time for you.

Let us know how you get on!

Answer 7

You are not going to get over what happened before unless you go for your scan tomorrow to put it simply.

Missing your scan is really not a good idea as it will make you even more worried. x*x

Answer 8

Please please don't worry too much. The chances are that your baby is going to be just fine this time. You've only had one miscarriage so there is nothing to say that there will be anything wrong.

Don't not go, that will definitely only make you worry more. I thought I had lost my baby, my HcG levels were really low to start and then shot up, and I have to wait 3 weeks for my scan to be sure, so I knw partly what you're going through.

I'm sure missed miscarriages are less common, so try to relax and take it easy. Let us know how it goes tomorrow. Big hugs! X

Answer 9

Not going to the scan wont stop an event as tragic as that from happening. All it will do is cause greater complications.

HOWEVER

I am sure that will not happen =)

Going to this scan will help to put your mind at massive ease!

If you go, you will see your little bean on the screen, hear his/her heartbeat. If you don't go, you will constantly be worrying about what is going on, how the baby is doing etc.

Like everyone else has said, take your partner/mum/close friend with you for support, and just think about all the good, happy things that will come from going to the scan, rather than the past and things that have gone wrong.

Best wishes, I am positive everything is going to be fine :D x

Answer 10

I am so sorry for your loss! I had my 1st scan at 6 weeks and I go for my next at 10 weeks which is in 6 days and I to am terrified their gonna say something is wrong, it's been almost a month since I've been to the doctor but I am really looking forward to going once it's over you will feel alot better! But all anyone can really do is hope and pray for the best! Good Luck..

Answer 11

I like you had a miscarriage a few years ago, I then got pregnant again and bled at 5, 7, 8 and 9 weeks.  Each time I was scanned and each time I felt sick with worry that the baby would be dead, but each time it was ok.  I then had my 12 week check up and saw the baby on the scan again and a few days after this bled heavily, went to A& E and was told I was losing the baby.  The hospital put me in a room alone over night and the following morning I was scanned AGAIN and guess what?  The minute the thing was put on my belly, there was my baby bouncing around and looking like she was waving (I have never cried so much in my life.)  She is 5 years old now and nicknames The Menace, lol.  So don't stress, it's the not knowing that is the worst and yes you will feel sick as you wait your turn, but how much better to know that all with probably be fine.

Good luck xx

Answer 12

Try not to worry.

Go see your little bub tomorrow and put your mind at ease.

I also had a blighted ovum 2years ago, and when I got pregnant this time, I woried so much the Dr sent me for a scan at 5 weeks, and i had one yesterday and am 7 weeks + 5 days and saw a little heartbeat.

I was terrified but am so happy now.

Good luck tomorrow

Answer 13

I have the same fears and I also have my 12 week scan tomorrow.  I will be 12 wks 6 days tomorrow.  I have a history of 3 miscarriages and then I was able to have my daughter thanks to progesterone supplements.  I am on progesterone supplements again and if I did miscarry that would probably cause it to be a missed miscarriage.  So I know exactly what you mean.  However, you (and I) have to go tomorrow for the scan, the chances are overwhelmingly in your favor.  You also have to consider that if the unlikely and awful has happened then you need to find out sooner than later as that is something that can affect your future fertility if not taken care of as soon as possible.  Also, no matter how long ago a loss happened, how well you have dealt with it, or whether or not you have carried another baby successfully, you will still be plagued by fears for a good part of each pregnancy.  Or at least I am.  Good Luck tomorrow, I am sure that if you go you will be glad you did.  You're not quaking in your boots alone.

Answer 14

imagine how you'll feel when you see your baby kicking around and his/her little heartbeat going. Focus on the positive, you'll be fine.

Answer 15

I know you are scared but you need to go for the health of your baby. Don't let what happen before ruin this pregnancy. I understand where you are coming from and I would be scared too but I'm sure you will be fine! Besides you'll feel better if you just go! Good Luck

Answer 16

I have been where you are right now, i miscarried 12mths before i found out i was pregnant and i didnt know i had lost the baby until scan day so im with you and i was terrified to go for that scan, it turned out i was 16weeks with the child i now have so i worried for nothing. You have to have faith , i can remember physically shaking going for the scan so i really do know how u feel, but please calm yourself i dont want to worry you more but stress isnt good for you right now or your baby.  my conforting words are my son is now 2years old, and throughout my pregnancy i was convinced something was going to go wrong, through this worry i was at the hospital for every twinge every tiny thing i felt was wrong. My boyfriends cousin even kicked a football and it hit my bump and it hurt so much i thought he was gone, But all was fine, also the staff at the hospital understood my over concerns on everything . x*x

Answer 17

I'm sure your fine! I go in tomorrow for my 20 week scan, (i never had a 12 week with this baby)

and I am so nervous but also excited to see my little one for the first time.

Save the tears for tomorrow, and you can have happy ones when you see your little baby swimming around!

Answer 18

I well if you had to go i would go but if you don't have to go then don't go i mean your not comfortable so it's alright to not go!!

Answer 19

Generally, unless you have something really wrong with yourself or your partner in the reproductive department, the chances of having another miscarriage in a row is relatively slim.

It's not easy, my mother had lot's of complications with carrying me, and lost many due to complications with her ovary, so knowing that grief really made me worry those first 13 weeks, h**l I didn't stop worrying until I got the results back from my 20 week ultrasound.

Good luck, do go to your scan, so they can make sure everything is ok, and if not...they can get you properly treated/diagnosed.

Answer 20

Hi honey. From what I read, it is normal for you to be worried. But chances of it happening again, and the exact same way, are pretty low. Try to relax, cause this stress could affect you baby. I'm certain everything will be just fine. If you don't go tomorrow, you'll be stuck with that doubt in your mind. Either you miscarried or not, you can't do nothing about it anyways. But I'm sure everything is perfect. Try to think of the positive instead : you are going to see your baby for the first time and it's such a great experience. Take care hun, don't worry.

Answer 21

Just because you deal with the grief of a miscarriage doesn't mean it wont still upset and scare you, believe me, i had mine over 2 years ago but it still upsets me now and haunted me through my last 2 pregnancies.

You're bound to be scared of it happening again and because you had no signs of a problem last time you've got nothing to look out for now. I cant give you any statistics or odds on how successful you may be but what i can say is it's possible to go on after a miscarriage and have perfectly normal pregnancies. I've had a daughter and a son after my miscarriage and they're both perfectly healthy, as was i through the pregnancies, it didn't stop me being scared though.

Good luck with the scan, i'm sure you'll be just fine.x

Answer 22

Its normal to worry a little but making yourself get all worked up isnt going to help anything. Just because it happened once does not mean it will happen again. I know its easier said than done but try your best to relax and not worry. Everything will be fine.

Answer 23

As much as you are scared you have to think of the baby. You want it to be healthy so the best thing to do is go for the appointment. Being a mom is scary especially when you are dealing with the health of any child. You have to treat the baby like it is alive because as far as you know it is!!! I feel sorry for you and I hope that everything goes well and I think it will. Even if you feel like you are not mentally ready for this pregnancy it doesn't matter because you are pregnant and have to be strong. I hope this helps and I hope something really good happened to you today to that you don't spend the whole day crying.  

Answer 24

Awww Hun don't worry so much-tell yourself it is very rare whathappenedd to you to happen once-let alone twice. and its natural for you to cry during pregnancy-your hormones are all over the place. just think of therelieff and happinessafterr the scan knowing your baby is healthy. good luck x

Answer 25

You must go to make sure you are pregnant and that the baby is okay.  I had my appt a few weeks ago and was nervous too for the same reason.  I thought 'what if there is no baby' or 'what if there is no heartbeat,' but I HAD to know either way.  

Go, but take someone with you for support if needed.  Good luck to you!

Answer 26

I can understand that you must be feeling really scared and nervous, but you have to go otherwise you won't know if all is ok or not.  Surely knowing is better than not knowing, which is why you are getting yourself so upset.  Can you not talk to your partner?  Let out all your emotions that you obviously bottled up when you miscarried.  

I wish you lots of luck and best wishes.  I'm sure all will be fine. xx